Addicted to pain killers don't know how to stop Posted: 06-14-08 15:33pm
I'm going to give you my whole story cause
I need to let it out. My name is Paul and
I've takin pain medicine for the last 6 or
7 years. It used to be just Codeine
Aspirins when I was younger. Then I got in
a car accident a few years ago and my
addictions have spiraled out of control
and I'm afraid I'm going to OD one of
these days. I have constant back pain but
I'm not sure if its the pain killers or
the accident that is currently causing the
pain. I took Vicodens for the 1st year and
have been battleing to stay off of them
ever since. I have a history of depression
(I've been taking Cybalta for it for 4
years) and anxiety problems (I've been
taking Zanax for 2 years). I haven't taken
any Vicodens for a few weeks now. I tried
taking Tramadols instead of Vicodens cause
they're not as strong but I found myself
taking 12-14 of them a day so I figured I
should try another pain med. Here is what
I currently take every single day - 6 or 7
650 MG Darvocets, 1 Cymbalta, 4 or 5 750
MG Methocarbamol's (a muscle relaxor), 1
or 2 Zanax's, and 1 Flexeril 10 MG so I
can go to bed at night. I also take Nexium
cause my stomach's messed up from taking
all of this crap. I have severe back pain
all the time now even when I'm taking all
of this medicine. In the last few weeks
I've been getting really nervous that I'm
going to accidentaly OD but I don't know
how to stop. I've taken some kind of pain
killer everyday for the past 7 years. I've
tried stopping at least 5 or 6 times but
never make it more than a few days. I've
talked to my doctor about how I didn't
want to take the Vicodens anymore so he
gave me a prescription for the Tramadols.
Those never got rid of the pain so I've
been taking a mixture of muscle relaxors
and Darvocet's everyday to numb the pain.
I really, truly want and need to stop
before something bad happens. This morning
I missed my Godson's 3rd birthday cause I
was uncontrollably crying all morning and
didn't want to cry in front of my family.
I have lost my relationship with my
parents cause of my addiction and I am not
there to see my neice and nephew grow up
because I stay in my apartment and take
pills every second I'm not at work. I
can't go into detox or rehab cause I can't
miss any work cause I used up all of my
sick and vacation time for the car
accident. I NEED to stop but dont' know
how or what my next step should be. Please
help me. I need someone to talk to about
this but have no one I can. Thank You.
|
Believe1114
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 15 Jun 2008 Posts: 1
Paul Posted: 06-15-08 15:34pm
I'm sorry to hear what you are dealing
with, but you have made the first step,
admitting you have a problem!!
I had a family member addicted to pain
killers and the only way he could stop is
to go into treatment. Withdrawals can be
horrible and you should not stop your meds
unless you are under the care of a medical
facility.
Contact your local hospital or treatment
center. Don't do it alone. You need a
professional that can help and give you
meds for withdrawal and monitor you very
closely. If you can't miss work they may
have options for you. But I think you
will need to be in treatment because of
your withdrawals.
Do you not want to call and tell your
parents or other family members you need
help? They may be able to assist you
financially until you get on your feet.
You may be surprised how supportive they
will be.
Did you check with your HR dept at work to
see if they have a program for addiction?
If you have insurance they should cover
it. Tell them you will take time off
without pay. This is your life and you
must think of yourself.
The family member that went in for
treatment had back pain. He found out
that the back pain was from the pain
killers over time. Though he started the
pain killers for a back injury they said
one of the side effects of long term use
is body aches, and possible back pain.
Keep us posted! You can do this!!
Blessings,
Leslie
|
glassnug
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 14 Jun 2008 Posts: 4
I flushed the pills down the toilet last night Posted: 06-15-08 18:54pm
I was a mess yesterday. I ended up
flushing my muscle relaxors and Darvocet's
down the toilet last night cause they are
always too tempting when they are around
the house. As for the answers to some of
your questions. My parents know I have had
problems in the past with the pills. I
actually moved back in with them a year
ago after living on my own for 5 years to
try to quit. I stopped taking Vicodens
for 3 months while living with them but
continued taking less powerful pain
medicine (tramadols). They think I only
take medicine when I need it now. I did
finally talk to my father yesterday
afternoon cause I couldn't stop crying. I
think part of the crying was because of
the Darvocets. I went to see a conselor
through my work's Employee Assistance
program while I was living at my parents
but I only ended up going once because it
was 45 minutes away. Last week I went to
see a Back Specialist and he was the one
that prescribed me the Darvocets. He wants
me to start going to a "pain treatment"
center where his office is located when I
get my X-Ray results back sometime this
week. Today I've taken 5 Tramadol's, 1
Nexium, 1 muscle relaxor and 2 Xanax. That
is by far the least amount of pills I've
taken in a day in months if not years. All
day I was in pain though. This sucks sooo
bad. I wish I didn't have to go through
with this crap and the pain would just go
away.
