I am a christian girl who has lived in a
foster family my whole life. I get very
depressed but no one seems to believe me
when I tell them that I'm feeling like
this. Basically everywhere I turn I get
turned away.
I try praying but God never answers me...I
want to feel better. The one person who I
thought I could always count on told me
today to get over it. I feel like she
doesn't care. I wish someone would care.
I wish someone would love me. I know I
don't deserve it, but I guess I think I
need it. My whole life has been about
doing things for everyone else and all I
want is someone to hold me and say that
everything is ok. I want God to be enough
for me...but honestly I can't seem to be
content with God's love. Am I being
stupid? Do I deserve to be loved? Im so
confused.
My friends think I'm attention seeking.
I'm not...atleast I think I'm not. I just
want someone to love me. I just want a
normal family who will be there to support
me, but I dont have that and all I wanted
was my friend to be there for me today,
but she turned away. I don't know where
to go now.
I have no one else. Life is not worth
living anymore. Will someone please help
me?? Lord, please help me.
|
cassandra2
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Apr 2008 Posts: 19
hello Posted: 04-12-08 15:10pm
Hello,
I read what you said and I really wanted
to give you some advice that might help
you. Well to start off you definitely
don't deserve to be treated the way you
are being treated because no one does
under any circumstance. I know the way you
are feeling and I know that it's not a
good feeling at all..it's horrible. It's
horrible to feel like you are not wanted
and everything because I've been
there..been through all of that. Right now
I'm having a lot of family issues and it's
not easy for me right now but I am coming
along I guess. Anyways, I understand that
it's probably even harder for you since
you were adopted and everything. How do
you get along with the family that you
have right now? Do you have any contact
with your real parents? Right now I am
facing anexity and depression issues so I
know what you are going through. I mean
I'm not going through the same exact thing
but my father is the same as the person
who told you to get over it..like he is
the same way, same attitude and it's hard.
Are your friends understanding of you? I
know that a lot of people do the cutting
for attention but then there are a lot of
people who do it because they think it
will make them feel better and because
they don't want to live anymore. I am sure
you are not doing it for attention but at
the same time you are..because you are
craving the attention that you aren't
getting. You know..it would be one thing
if you got a lot of attention and you were
doing it but it sounds like you don't get
any attention to begin with so it's like
your body is craving for the love and
attention that you need..that you aren't
getting already. I definitely
understand..I have been to the points
where I really had strong urges to cut but
I try to fight them off even though it's
really hard. I mean I think personally you
should be going for help..like seeing a
psychologist or something to help you cope
with your problems. Does your parents know
that you cut? Maybe if they did see your
cuts they would realize that you are not
kidding around and that you are serious.
Please let me know how you are doing and I
am willing to talk to you further about
this and help you.
Please email me!
|
nutmeg08
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 03 Sep 2008 Posts: 8 Location: Norwich, England
Thanks: 0
Thanked:1
Posted: 09-03-08 15:21pm
hi
i too am a Christian who cuts.
I am sorry to hear that you are having a
hard life.
I know how you feel about feeling as if
God is not there or is and just does not
answer your prayers. When you do not feel
close to God go into your room remove your
sharp objects put some Christian music on
and read your bible. After you have
finished reading your chosen bible passage
just pray that God will draw you closer to
him and will help you get the right help
and support you need to help you get
better. I know it is hard but it will help
as it is what i have been told to do in
the past. If you want to talk please just
PM me. I am here for you !
((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS FOR DAHKOTA
))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
)))
