combination of eating disorders Posted: 05-04-08 22:01pm
I've developed my own kind of eating
disorder over the past year. On good days,
which vary from 5-6 times a week, I'll eat
around 600-700 calories. However, on bad
days, which I've been having way more
frequently than I used to, I can eat
somewhere between 2000 to 4000 calories. I
used to be a little overweight, dropped
about 30 lbs, gained 10 back, lost 5 more,
gained 2 back.
I feel like a useless piece of fat crap.
I haven't had my period since last July.
I'm 15, I got my period when I was 11, and
it was very regular up until then.
On Friday in school, I was sitting in my
desk when I suddenly fainted. I've still
been feeling dizzy and weak since then,
and my heart is weirdly hurting. However,
for the past three days I've been eating a
lot - ranging from 1200 to maybe 2500
today.
Whenever I hang out with friends, we
usually buy tons of crap food and just pig
out. I hardly ever "binge" by myself. I
started to binge with friends to almost
prove to them that I didn't have an eating
disorder because I was losing weight so
rapidly, but now it's just out of control.
I can't stop myself from just stuffing my
face until my stomach is about ready to
explode.
I don't know what's going on with my body
- I'm confused, lonely, worried. I've been
dealing with on and off depression. I have
this need to be perfect - I just want to
look effortlessly flawless to strangers
and friends (most of my friends are
skinny, tall and blonde), and I have no
idea why. It's almost like a subconscious
thing - As I'm typing this now, I know it
seems silly and absurd but I just can't
help it.
I don't know what I'd call myself, eating
disorder wise. I don't know why I'm
fainting or why I haven't had my period -
I'd think that the "binge" days could lead
to enough body fat to prevent those.
I'm so torn between caring and not caring.
I don't want to gain weight and be fat
again, but I don't want my life to cycle
around dieting and calories. I want to
enjoy just one or two slices of pizza
without feeling guilty OR without shoving
the whole thing down my throat. HELP!
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v00d00cita
Advanced Support Team
Joined: 04 Mar 2006 Posts: 718
Thanks: 0
Thanked:3
Posted: 05-09-08 03:38am
You should go to a doctor and ask for some
exams in the first place.
You must be getting weak every day and
probably you are losing vitamins and
protein as well.
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blueyesmile
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 Mar 2008 Posts: 7 Location: Lee's Summit, Mo USA
Posted: 05-11-08 16:50pm
i do the same thing. and i don't know what
to do. i've been trying so hard to be
'normal' again. if someone has any
suggestions...please help.
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v00d00cita
Advanced Support Team
Joined: 04 Mar 2006 Posts: 718
Thanks: 0
Thanked:3
Posted: 05-11-08 17:00pm
You can get healthier, really. Now, you
must seek professional help. You are aware
of your problems, right? So that's one
thing left for you to do
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