I just needed to write this down somehwere
or have someone understand where I am
right now - Its fine if you don't; I don't
understand myself sometimes.
I'm 22 - and recently I have these strange
fears that everyone is simply going to
leave me no matter what I do, even family
and friends - its worse with my boyfriend.
Whenever I find myself alone even if its
for a few hours I panic - I want to call
everyone and see if they're okay and when
they don't pickup or return my calls I
panic and blame it on myself
- I tell myself that my friends won't
call me because I'm boring and stupid. If
my boyfriend doesn't pick up I tell myself
its beause he's cheating on me and he's
found someone prettier or smarter than me
and he's probably happier without me. I
usually find myself useless untill I see
or hear from my friends/boyfriend when I
typically "perk" back up but after a few
hours i go back into worrying again.
I hate this no matter how I try to
distract myself or talk myself out of this
irrational fears it never works and I'm so
sick of crying by myself that I can't
stand it. - thank you for reading even if
no one can help
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WishOnStars
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Aug 2008 Posts: 3 Location: Massachusetts, USA
might help...idk Posted: 08-06-08 18:35pm
well im 21 and i dont understand myself a
LOT of the time so your not alone there. I
think everyone at one point in their life
has not understood themselves.
I worry like you said sometimes also, not
as much so idk exactly what your going
through but i have a little idea. i know
you probably do but what i find that helps
is telling myself that they are busy at
work or in the shower and will get back to
me when they can. also i try and go online
to see if anyone is on MSN,Yahoo,AIM or
anything so i can know everyone is not
gone.
i worry about little things a bunch also,
im starting to work on it by telling
myself "everything will work out in time,
there is no reason to worry about little
things" its starting to work. cuz its not
good for you to stress or worry about
little thing.
well i dont know if that helped any but i
tried.
if you ever want to talk feel free to PM
me!
take care
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Tmddyan
Moderator
Joined: 13 Jun 2006 Posts: 4438 Location: post falls, id usa
Thanks: 101
Thanked:68
Posted: 08-06-08 19:10pm
i know exaclty how you feel. ive actually
had more than one person-family members
included leave me--now its imprinted in my
brain that no matter what i do people will
always leave me and that its no use making
friends because they will just stab you in
the back and leave. I spend most of my
time alone, or working. its sad. I know
people arent gone but to me it seems like
they are.
if you want to talk you can pm me
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acullen1912
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 05 Aug 2008 Posts: 2
thank you Posted: 08-06-08 20:39pm
I want to thank you for replying to my
original message. Things actualy got a
little worse today, when I told my
boyfriend how i feel the discussion
eventually would down to us breaking up,
He feels that I ought to be able to find
someone who can be there more for me. I
don't know what to do, we've been together
for three years and I can't picture myself
without him and as depressed as i am over
this i find myself panicking even more,
what if I never find anyone else - its
hard enough to meet people but he's the
only guy I've ever liked - I was blown
away when he asked me out... i don't know
I'm so miserable right now and i can't
even get a hold of my firends to talk to
them - I'm all alone
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Tmddyan
Moderator
Joined: 13 Jun 2006 Posts: 4438 Location: post falls, id usa
Thanks: 101
Thanked:68
Posted: 08-06-08 22:05pm
well we are here for you--if you ever need
to talk im just a click away.
is there a way that your bf can make more
time for you? i think that would help. if
he gave you and extra 30 min a day would
that help?
