Teen Pregnancy Forum - I want a baby at 13


I want a baby at 13

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Reptar

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Posted: 04-10-08 17:14pm


you ARE A 13 year old. You're a teenager. You don't have a grown up body. You don't have a grown up mind. It will NOT fulfill your life. You'll lose out on some of the most important years of your life. You'll end up with a child who hates you because you wanted to have them for you, not because you were anywhere near capable of having one. You're acting very selfish and immature. How much do you make a week? What's your paycheck? Do you know how much it costs to give birth? Do you know how much it costs to raise a child for just one year? Multiply that by 18 and add another couple thousand for good measure and you're still not even close to how much money it costs. You'll fail school, your boyfriend WILL leave you, and you'll be working two jobs for the rest of your life. If you think anyone is going to give you advice, you've got another thing coming. You already know how to get pregnant. However, actually caring for that child is another thing. But go right ahead, we could use another baby in the adoption system.

krystineM

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Posted: 04-10-08 17:46pm


So let me get this straight, you missed school, failed a few classes, teachers KNEW about your situation, and did nothing. Didn't call social services, didnt get social workers involved, just said oh well! She'll be fine. You are so oblivious it blows me away. Any guy at 13and over will say anything, JUST to get laid. lol your giving him a free ride hun, of course he'll say 'i feel the same way baby' WAKE UP! He's the man of your dreams...correction he's the BOY of your dreams, and sweety, your 13. You dont know what love is! Hell you think it comes from a child secretly. You stated yourself parents who are older dont even know what their doing, so why would it be different for you? IF anything, it would make it harder for you! Your saying you'll give the baby the things it needs, but you have no clue how much it costs, or how much stress you suffer from worrying if you have enough for diapers or formula for the month. You can die during child birth, or miscarry the baby, and like Reptar said [i think it was Reptar] there is no way the govornment would let a 13 yr old child keep a baby when she is a baby herself! You know why none of this scares you? Because your stubborn, and you dont want to listen or think of concequences to what you want to do. You block out the information people are giving you. And its not meant to scare you, its to give your head a shake and realize how ridiculious you sound.

kcsgirl_101

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Posted: 04-10-08 18:36pm


thts not true my friend kept her baby and she's 14. mayb thts what i want

Reptar

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Posted: 04-10-08 19:06pm


Did your friend have reliable parents? They're the ones raising the baby. Not your 14 year old friend. You don't have parents that will help you out. You apparently raise yourself and your siblings. You CAN'T AFFORD A CHILD. Jesus, I've never met someone so thick-skulled. You can't even reply to anything we're asking because it's obvious you have NO CLUE HOW TO RAISE AND SUPPORT A CHILD. You don't have the brains, the maturity, the body, the money, or the time. You're being selfish and immature. Maybe you want a child for your own bloody reasons, not because you're capable or ready or even really want to love someone. You only care about your needs, which you've demonstrated time and time again by not answering how you'll care for a child.

krystineM

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Posted: 04-10-08 19:16pm


maybe thats what you want. maybe thats what you want...have you asked you friend how stressful it is? If she says its all peachy and roses, its a lie my dear. Just like i said in the other post, you proved my point exactaly right. You block out the IMPORTANT things we all are saying, because it has no intrest to you and doesnt matter in your head because all you want is a baby so badly! you are being 100% selfish only thinking of yourself, not what could possibly go wrong. You've be raising this baby on your own, your friend like Reptar said, most likely had supportive parents, because there is no way a 14 yr old would be able to do it on her own. You not going to prove to any of us that your capable and fit to raise a child. You a kid. You dont have to maturity, the education, the financial stability, support..all you have is a boyfriend who you think is god, and actualy wants this, but he is just doing it for a free ride. hes a 14 yr old KID, they will agree to anything just to get in a girls pants. At 18 and 22weeks pregnant, i am worrying about if we have the money to raise our child, if i will be a fit parent, if i will do a good job and much more. But you, at 13, think she knows it all. Get a grip. Your a kid.

manuftw82

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Posted: 04-10-08 20:22pm


Everything everyone says is SO true. You really need to listen to them. Don't you want to be able to provide for your family? Why don't you at least get your high school degree or your college degree and a real job and then think about having a baby. You wanting a baby is incredibly selfish. When you have a baby you have to sacrifice nearly everything for that child. You want a baby to fill some void that you have yet you can not provide for that child. That child does not have a choice in this situation. It would not have chosen to be born to parents who weren't financially ready. Instead of thinking about your own needs think about the needs of this potential baby.

kcsgirl_101

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Thank You Posted: 04-10-08 20:41pm


i understand thank all of u i was being stubborn and stupid. im still going to want 1 but i'm not going to act on it thanks i apprecitae it

manuftw82

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Posted: 04-10-08 21:12pm


okay good I am glad you are making the right decision. When you get older you will be able to enjoy a baby a lot more.

krystineM

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Posted: 04-10-08 21:36pm


i bet youll look back on this and say thank god i waited! it seems like a walk in the park with the way some parents are with their child, but behind all the cuddles and praises, its hecktic, stressful and frustrating. I think you'll be glad that you waited.

Reptar

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Posted: 04-10-08 21:59pm


Thank you so much. You're really saving two lives here. When you're more ready to have a child, you will, and you'll love it. But thankfully you've made the right decision in deciding to wait until the stress won't kill you.

lele25

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Posted: 04-10-08 22:49pm


I more than likely have no room to speak....I'm not a teen parent, in fact I'm not a parent at all, but I can tell you what I think, which I realize not everybody will agree with.....I graduated from high school, went to college, I had the great dreamy college expirence of going through rush, being in a sorority, meeting a great guy, having a wonderful engagement followed by an even more beautiful wedding and honeymoon. I realize that this is not for everyone but at the age of 13 your passing up all of this and more. There is no way that any of this would have happen if I were strapped down with a baby. I'm now 25 and my husband is 28 we both have very successful carreers, just finished building a house and we are still waiting on a baby. I know that not everyone thinks like us but you should know that there is so much more that you can do with your life. You are so young and to have a child at this age is stupid, foolish, immature, and self serving. Think about it really....do you honestly think that "taking care" of you siblings qualifies you as a parent??? I think that more than anything you are in need of serious therapy. I hope that your boyfriend will wise up and put on a condom or even better...quit having sex with you.

gobbledygook

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Posted: 04-11-08 07:56am

kcsgirl_101 wrote:

no but i have w/ his parents

How are your bf's mom and dad going to get custody of you? Don't your parents have to be declared bad parents or something like that?

Are his parents going to adopt you, or just be your foster parents? What about your child, who will be their legal guardian? Who will be responsible to pay for everything, and who's health insurance will you be under?

sarahhendrickson

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Posted: 04-11-08 09:56am


Legally your a child at 13, you can't get a real job until sixteen. Believe me I know about living and being a grownup child. I raised my 2 sisters and have paid bills since I was 6 and learned how to use a calculator. And then at sixteen I became independent and I did it all on my own! But I thank GOD that I never got pregnant, I finished HS and then meet the love of my life and we married and had our first baby. It's hard, and we were married, and both had jobs and we were 19-20! There is no way I would wish that upon you, and definatley not for that child. Hold on to your baby dreams, and work on getting a good place to bring a baby home to that no one can take away. Finish growing up, do things like go on spring break to FL or to Maridi Gras! My hubby and I won't get to do those things like others our age. Enjoy getting to be a child!

Rosie H

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Posted: 04-11-08 11:19am


I can see why you want a baby. Your life sucks even your own mom doesnt want you or love you enough to take proper care of you and your siblings. You want someone to love you back and someone that deserves all your hard work and dedication. Your parents didnt care about all the times YOU had to take care of their problems. Or no one noticed all the times you were left alone helpless and afraid, but a baby might???? Cause that child will always love YOU. YOU gave that baby life. Now I may be totally off base but my childhood was a lot like yours and I remember wanting to either kill myself or just die when I was 13. Thats why instead of having sex I started to do drugs with my mom. See I have 5 other siblings that I still clothe and take care of. Yes I fed them yes I bathed them and yes I made sure they got on the school bus in the morning. We, The 3 older ones always went hungry to feed the three babies. I know exactly how it feels to raise kids. My mom was always gone or wasted. I had to steel food to feed my bros and sis. My mom got beat all the time and I was molested. Needless to say i was a mom way before I even knew what that was. I am now 21 and all my bros and sis still rely on me as their support as their mother. But now I am pregnant with my own baby. Me and my hubby have been together for 2 1/2 years. We have a home a car and good jobs. but I dont think any of my past motherhood has prepared me for my own child. Cause I really have no idea how it is to be a mom. My bros and sis werent my kids and at any time I could run, but this is my baby and my responsibility now. Financially emotionally I am prepared to care for a baby. but that still does not mean I know squat about being a mom because I NEVER HAVE BEFORE. Until that baby comes home with me I am not a mother. I have no clue whats in store for me. I am however thankful that I have waited until now to have a baby, Cause now I wont have any regrets. I wont lose my teenage years. I am gaining the best gift there is. SO please just think about this. You are so lucky right now because you have the power to make yourself into somebody great. You no longer have to care for children. You can focus on your boyfriend and school and work. You can save money and get an education. You and your boyfriend can seriously give your baby everything you never had. But IT IS IMPOSSIBLE TO DO ALL THAT RIGHT NOW. PLease just face that one fact and wait. I am sure you will make an awesome mom just because of all you have had to go through. But if you had a baby now you would be depriving yourself your bf and your child of the life you all deserve. You are such a strong person though I can feel it in your posts. You have been through so much but as you get older you can change that. I started working at 14 and turned my life around. I got out of drugs and graduated high school. I am now making 18.00 an hour and am so happy cause I worked hard for where I am at. You can do this too. Trust me you were meant to make it through this. And when the time is right you will make an awesome mother.

michellep2

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Posted: 04-11-08 12:10pm


U really should wait,i wanted a baby so bad ever since i was able to understand what being a mom was ( when i was 12). So i took care of my puppy prissy, but i still felt like i would die if i didn't become a mother. But then i realized something i can't give this child the life that i want to give it. I've had a horrable life! From being raped so many times, trying to kill myself from depression, and being homelessand living on the streets and along highways. And i've always told my self that i would give my child a better life! I would make somthing of myself! Have enough money to stay in a home and keep food in our home. But you can't do that untill you get out of highschool, graduate, maybe even go to college so u can make more money. Do all this so that your baby will grow up happy, healthy, and proud that there parents weren't thinking of there own needs. My mom was16 when she had me, i never want to do that to my child. I am 18 now and i'm expecting my first baby on october 24. I know my child will respect me more because i chose to wait, and i knoe s/he will have a better life because of it. Please think of what that child would have to go through.

krystineM

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Posted: 04-11-08 12:20pm


no need for caps michellep2

michellep2

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Posted: 04-11-08 12:25pm


i didn't realize my caps lock was on. sorry

krystineM

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Posted: 04-11-08 12:27pm


its cool just some people take it suckers or rude on here.

kcsgirl_101

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Posted: 04-11-08 13:56pm


thank you i appreciate all of this especially rosie and mishelle and i am going to a therapist your right i shouldn't have a child the reason that i'm going is bcuz my parents found a suicide not and an empty bottle of prescription pain killers by my bed i really do just want sum1 2 love me god now i'm crying thank u every1 tho

Ingi

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Posted: 04-11-08 14:11pm

kcsgirl_101 wrote:

thank you
i appreciate all of this
especially rosie and mishelle
and i am going to a therapist
your right i shouldn't have a child
the reason that i'm going is bcuz my parents found a suicide not and an empty bottle of prescription pain killers by my bed
i really do just want sum1 2 love me
god now i'm crying
thank u every1 tho

I was serious about getting a pet. They will love you and look to you for support and attention while allowing you to be a teenager still. And your BF loves you. As do your parents - or they wouldn't be taking you to see a counselor!

This will work itself out and in a few years you will be happy you didn't give into the baby fever. Those will be the years you are racing around in cars with boys and going to dances and on dates. All the things girls can't do with babies on their hip.

I'm glad you are getting help.