sql_query_rowset error: sql_query_rowset error: sql_query_rowset error: sql_query_rowset error: Teen Pregnancy Forum - Mom relationship & teen pregnancy
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krystineM

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Mom relationship & teen pregnancy
Posted: 03-08-08 00:20am

so i had another movie and dinner night with my mom,
and this one did not turn out well AT ALL.
everything seemed to be going fine, we chatted the whole way to the movie theatre and were laughing and what not.
Then after the movies we went to have dinner, and thats when everything went down hill...
We were talking here and there, and i told her about when i heard the baby's heart beat, and when my next appointments were; she's hasn't accepted this pregnancy of mine fully yet, which i understand, but i still like to ahare things ive been going through and visits to my Dr's with her too to keep her updated, and maybe that way she would accept it little by little along the way.
Then, she started a conversation with:
'im having a really hard time with this and finding it really hard to accept this, and i cant seem to shake it'
and i said, i understand, i know you still need time.
then she said 'i guuess what im finding really hard is that i cant do the things i imagined doing with you, like being there when the baby's born, being there at the baptism or shopping with you for the baby...'
and i was like woah..your not gonna be there when my baby-your grandchild is born? and your not going to want to be at the baptism either??
she was like, i dont want to be around George[bf/fiance] and his family.
That's her reason for not wanting to be apart of this.
she also said how i did not even invite her to a DR's appointment, and to be honest, seeing as how she didnt really like my situation on keeping this baby, and how she does not even show an intrest or the slightest bit of concern/intrest when i talk about the baby and appointments, i never thought she would want to come to an appointment.
I was upset and stopped eating, and didnt say much after,
then we got into an argument and we got ready to leave and i called George to pick me up.
And as i left i said since your not wanting to be apart of the birth i wont call when i go into labour... and she was like you think i wanted this? you took this away from me this is your fault!
This isnt my fault, im doing what i feel is right in my heart, she's the one whos stopping herself from doing all these things, im not saying she cant be apart of this...
you kno...i knew she was not going to be pleased when hearing im pregnant, but i never thought she would say she wouldnt be there for the birth or baptism...cuz i want her to be there, but it doesnt matter what i say.
All i know is that this is not my fault for her reason as to why she doesnt want to be apart of this, thats her fault and problem...
all i want to do is just curl up in a ball and cry...
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benc152

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Posted: 03-08-08 02:12am

when it gets closer to the time i'm sure she'll decide to come.
i can't imagine somebody missing that =\
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Verizon-y

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Posted: 03-08-08 03:30am

What is her problem? What is the deal with her and George? How can she blame George for her not being at these important events?

I'm so sorry you had to go through that rejection from your own mother. She needs a good slap.
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jessamyn

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Posted: 03-08-08 03:34am

Al I can say is hopefully she will come around... give it time and focus on you!
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krystineM

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Posted: 03-08-08 11:02am

thats what my bf said too, we're not telling her she cant be here for these beautiful and wonderful things, shes choosing not to be there. which is her fault and problem.
just cuz im pregnant at 18 shouldnt make it all my fault for lack of intrest or wanting to be there when my baby is born.
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Verizon-y

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Posted: 03-08-08 12:25pm

krystineM wrote:
thats what my bf said too, we're not telling her she cant be here for these beautiful and wonderful things, shes choosing not to be there. which is her fault and problem.
just cuz im pregnant at 18 shouldnt make it all my fault for lack of intrest or wanting to be there when my baby is born.


SHE KICKED YOU OUT! She only has herself to blame if she is what she is angry about is that you are pregnant and unmarried and 18.

Is that what she's angry about, though? Because in your original post you didn't mention that at all. You only said she was mad at George. What else did she say that makes you think she's angry about you being pregnant at your age?
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krystineM

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Posted: 03-08-08 18:50pm

i didnt say she's shes angry,
but not accepted it or adjusted, which is understandable, shes disappointed right now with the situation.
She doesnt want to be there for any of these things [birth, baptism etc.] cuz she does not like George's family.

We've both accepted the fact that i am no longer living at home.
Her kicking me out and me not living at home has nothing to do with the reason as to why shes mad or unaccepting
What she's not accepted fully yet is that im having a baby, at 18.
And she does not like George's parents/family, which is why she doesnt want to be around for anything.
Which is not my fault. She's the one whos choosing not to be apart of this.
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Mints_MeatPie

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Posted: 03-09-08 05:54am

I say give her some more time for it to completely sink in. Having said that, it is not your fault. It's her choice not to attend the birth and baptism. She had/has the option to tolerate your boyfriend/fiance, at least, if she wants to be part of this, but she hasn't taken it, yet.
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krystineM

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Posted: 03-09-08 11:18am

yeah, i even called my dad last night and told him what happened, but had said to him dad i really want you and marilyn[step-mom] to be there for the birth and baptism and other things cuz it would really mean alot to me, and this baby is as much a part of your life as it is mine.
and he also said just give it some time she might come around.
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Verizon-y

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Posted: 03-09-08 18:11pm

Good. Your dad is reasonable. What is there not to like about George's family? They seem like nice people.
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Ingi

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Posted: 03-09-08 18:14pm

Your BF's name is George and his nephew? Guess we know you won't be naming your baby George if its a boy, huh?
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krystineM

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Posted: 03-09-08 19:11pm

lol its a tradition in greek families to name the first son after the grandfather, so you can imagine how many George's are in our family Razz
to give you a taste, we have Big George, Little George[my bf/fiance] and Baby George our nephew and theres a lot more too lol
And then also to name the first girl after the grandmother, but George isnt too much into tradition, so we might just stick to a Greek name instead lol

His family are such nice people, i really cant understand why my mom has something against them...but then againmy mom holds onto grudges like she does to how many shoes she has.
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Verizon-y

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Posted: 03-09-08 19:50pm

But a grudge usually means there was an argument somewhere along the way.
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krystineM

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Posted: 03-09-08 22:40pm

if you knew my mother, youd understand.
she can just think of a reason to be mad and hold on to it for a long time.
the only argument i can think of, is when she kicked me out. but that was resolved and we've come to an understanding that i live here now and thats that.

Sometimes people hold on to things like that cuz they know they were wrong some where along the line, but dont want to admitt it. Which could be the case in this situation with my mom. And now shes blaming me for things i could and should have done in her eyes.
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Verizon-y

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Posted: 03-09-08 23:16pm

Gotcha. You're right, people do that all of the time.
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krystineM

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Posted: 03-09-08 23:27pm

after like...years of her doing the same thing, it really gets annoying..
but hurts now cuz after all i am doing what i feel is right in my heart, and with what she says, like not wanting to be apart of all this, it makes me wonder sometimes.
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Verizon-y

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Posted: 03-10-08 00:03am

Don't get mad, but your mom sounds a little bit immature and selfish. She doesn't exhibit the unconditional love that one would expect from a parent.
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krystineM

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Posted: 03-10-08 07:34am

it really seems more like a love/hate relationship.
like she'll love me one minute and be super nice and we can joke around, but then she snaps out of no where...she is a real two faced person.
And even now, with the responses and things she says...i mean i know she needs time still to accept this, but with what she says, she is making this whole situation harder on me than it has to be..you kno?
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Reptar

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Posted: 03-23-08 23:06pm

Congrats on not being pregnant.
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