Were both 18, we have been going out for
about 2 years. Yesterday I was going to
meet up with him at target and he says
that i can only see me for a few seconds
and then I have to go with nick. Before
that he was at Alex%u2019s house and then
went to his Alex%u2019s sister%u2019s
house. I told him I couldn%u2019t see him
earlier that day because I%u2019m baby
sitting my little sister because he
insisted of picking me up. Harry asked me
if he wanted to hangout at his house with
max, everyone knows I can%u2019t see any
men because of my boyfriend.
I%u2019ve known Harry longer than my
boyfriend and max is 14 years old. But
for the past two years I have lost many of
my friends because I have to make up
stupid excuses why I cant see them. While
I let my boyfriend run around with his
friends. He says, %u201CIf you had any
friends that were girls I would be okay
with it.%u201D The only friend that was a
girl moved away, I cant have any friends
who are girls because I%u2019m too weird.
It was a slap on the face on my 18th
birthday when I invited 10 girls and none
of them show up while all the guys did.
(last year)
Last Saturday my mom had a going away
party for one of her friends and I invited
2 of my friends and my boyfriend. My
boyfriend was the only one who came.
Another slap to the face of how uninvolved
I was with my friends that it%u2019s not
even worthwhile to come to my house for
free food. I don%u2019t dress nice I
always cover my body with a big black
sweater. And I still manage to make guys
like me more than I can count on one hand.
My boyfriend knows of this and
doesn%u2019t want me around any of my
friends, because most of them like me.
Yesterday I did go to Harry%u2019s house
and I played video games and showed them
funny videos on youtube. I went because I
felt that it was unfair for him to see his
friends and I can%u2019t see mine. And
now my boyfriend will probably ignore me
for a week for "punishment". Which drives
me crazy because I talk to him all the
time and I love him.
I have chronic depression, I throw up food
every day for past couple months, I%u2019m
just not myself. Every so often he puts me
in chokeholds, grabs my neck and pins me
down, grabs my neck and pushes me against
something, (seems to happen in public
places)
A month ago I was going to see him after
work and my friend Rico meet up with me I
wasn't sure if I was going to see him
because his dad took him shopping out of
the blue. My boyfriend planed for his
friends to meet up with him after his
work. He got angry at me because I didn't
tell him Rico was coming and I didn't even
know if he was coming. I got in the car
with my boyfriend%u2019s mom driving. And
then he grabs me and starts pinching my
arms he says it%u2019s for punishment. I
told him to stop and I tried to fight back
but I couldn't hit him hard enough to make
him stop. I know pinching doesn't sound
bad but I had more than 5 bruises and it
was like torture someone you love wanting
to hurt you, punishment because he didn't
get his way. I am scared to ever say
anything because it might piss him off.
I%u2019m 4''10 he%u2019s 5''6 and can over
power me easily.
He also gets mad when he can%u2019t see me
I want to be with my friends. I
don%u2019t understand why though. If
he%u2019s with his friends and he
can%u2019t see me. Why can%u2019t I be
with mine?
I feel trapped, I don%u2019t want to break
up with him even though he sounds like an
ass, and he loves me and shows it so much
at times.
Advice? D:
|
Beline
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Mar 2008 Posts: 178 Location: , South Africa
Thanks: 15
Thanked:11
Posted: 04-21-08 09:33am
You are obviously a very beautiful girl,
and that is why guys love to be around
you, and girls don’t pitch up when you
invite them over.
I very concerned about your boyfriend
though. Don’t get me wrong. I can
understand that he is jealous, but the
physical abuse worries me. Men who abuse
woman normally start out with ‘minor’
things like pinching or a slap on the
butt. But he has reached a point however
where he doesn’t care who sees him. You
mentioned that he even does this in public
and in front of his mom. You should be
seeing red lights now. Really bright
ones.
Another big concern for me is your eating
habits. You need help in this department.
Tell your mother, a friend, or anybody
that you trust, and get the help that you
need. Anorexia is a very serious
condition.
|
Rosie H
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Jun 2007 Posts: 908 Location: Phoenix, AZ, USA
Thanks: 0
Thanked:0
Posted: 04-21-08 09:59am
Sorry to hear that you feel trapped right
now. I know that that is not a good
feeling. My advice to you would be to
really look at why you love this guy. Also
look at all of the pros and cons of being
with him. Once you have a list together
see how good or bad he is for you. From
what I have read he sounds like he is a
very negative influence in your life and
he is making you into someone you arent
happy with. If there is more bad to out
weigh the good then maybe you should
rethink your relationship with him.
You sound like an intellegent and
beautiful girl whom people love. you
should not have to hide yourself from the
world just because your boyfriend is
possesive and insecure. It just isnt fair.
There are so many good guys out there that
trust their girlfriends and respect them
too.
My main concern is him physically abusing
you. One thing I have learned is that once
a man lays his hands on you he will most
definately do it again. If he doesnt see
anything wrong with what hes doing right
now then there will be more violence in
the future. He has no right to hit you or
choke you! He doesnt own you you are a
human being! Please rethink this and
rethink your safety. I know its hard when
you love someone but try to think of
yourself 1st.
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This page was last updated on April 1, 2008
