Yesterday was one of the saddest days of
my life. After endless battles and
begging, our daughter went into rehab. I
drove her 4 hours away to Albany where she
was going to stay for 40 days. After the 7
days of detox, she was out. We knew who
would be picking her up and several of the
family members called him and pleaded with
him not to get her. He looked my husband
in the eye and promised he would not go.
The nurse called me to tell me that he
picked her up early Sunday morning. She
also said Juli was anxious, and cocky to
the nurses. She also refused to take the
antibiotics that the Doctor prescribed for
strep throat. We do not know where she is.
She has not called any one nor answered my
texts. The fam is sick over this. I feel
hopeless and sad and frustrated and every
other emotion that one can throw in there.
I don't know if she is eating or able to
shower or has a warm place to sleep or
even a damn blanket for that matter. I am
SO SO ANGRY. Drugs are stealing our
children. Oh My Gosh, i could say the most
awful things right now, but i would more
than likely get thrown off this site.
I will attend alanon tomorrow nite. I
don't know what else to do. My baby is out
there somewhere. I am sick at my stomach,
i smoke like a train and i drink enough
coffee to float a battle ship. My nerves
are shot. Each time the phone rings i
about have a heart attack.
This problem has been going on for so
long. Pot, coke, pills, oxys now IV heroin
use. I just feel that my girl will be
dead....soon.
To any one out there with an addiction,
PLEASE PLEASE seek help for yourself, or
ask someone to help. If you could only
know the pain and heartach that a family
feels. She has a 7 year old son. CPS
turned temp custody over to his other
gramma. Thats fine, they are very good to
him. There was a report that says that
when the CPS worker talked to the baby he
had some bad things to say. One was that
his mom would take himtohouses that had
boards on the windows. He was told to lay
down in the seat while mommy goes inside
for a quick visit. My stomach turned. He
alse found him mom passed out on the
toilet with a loaded syring in her hand.
If i don't have a breakdown after this it
will be a miracle.
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bbfeet9
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 05 Feb 2008 Posts: 62 Location: ,
?????? Posted: 03-17-08 15:58pm
After trying to post the above, I got a
warning that this posting was censored and
had undesirable text??? I don't know what
that means.
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Birch
Supporter
Joined: 07 Nov 2005 Posts: 3939 Location: Bliss,
Thanks: 121
Thanked:12
Posted: 03-17-08 16:02pm
It is so tragic that people can lose
everything, and still use.
I am glad you are going to meetings. They
will help you!
Best wishes...
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tigertail
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 Mar 2008 Posts: 1
Posted: 03-17-08 17:09pm
Has she tried methadone? It could save
her life! Its worked for years for
thousands of people. Check into it. Hugs
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Chicagogirl
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Mar 2008 Posts: 16
Posted: 03-17-08 17:57pm
^ not to be disrespectful as I'm sure you
were trying to be helpful. But in order
for her daughter to get methadone she
would have to detox. Meaning she would
need to stay in the clinic.
She's done an amazing job by standing by
her daughter and seriously more than most
would do after they've basically been
slapped in the face.
You can NOT force someone to take meds.
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CarolDiane
Moderator
Joined: 23 Sep 2007 Posts: 2390 Location: ,
Thanks: 110
Thanked:156
Re: ?????? Posted: 03-17-08 18:03pm
bbfeet9
wrote:
After trying to post the
above, I got a warning that this posting
was censored and had undesirable text??? I
don't know what that
means.
That usually means that u have used a word
or sentence that the board does not
permit. No biggie. Just have to be a
little careful on the wording you use. I
might help you to read the posting
guidlines to help you understand the
limitation of posting. There are not many,
but there are a few. Might have just been
the way you worded something.
Now to the topic at hand. If she is 18 or
over there is really no to much you can
do. Even if she were to be Bakker Acted
she still could leave after 72 hours
unless at least 5 doctors and or nurses
determine she is a threat to herself or
others. I know how you feel. I have been
in your shoes. The only thing I might
suggest is show her love and support.
Bickering is not going to do any good but
make her turn against you even more. This
is called "Tough Love". Make her
understand that you are not for the way
she is acting but that you love her enough
to want her well and safe. Living a life
that is clean and productive.
Carrie
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Georgia59
Supporter
Joined: 11 Apr 2007 Posts: 5539 Location: Along the Mississippi, USA
Thanks: 87
Thanked:31
Posted: 03-17-08 18:35pm
Hey
definitely stay in the allanon meetings-
it really sounds like you need support. I
can understand your frustration- but
realize it's not your fault!
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Jacobs
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 19 Mar 2008 Posts: 6
Posted: 03-19-08 15:44pm
Methadone is not an answer, it's trading
one drug addiction for another. Please
keep going to Al Anon. 1 meeting won't
fix anything. If you stick with it,
though, it can save your life. Maybe not
your daughter's, but yours.
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Georgia59
Supporter
Joined: 11 Apr 2007 Posts: 5539 Location: Along the Mississippi, USA
Thanks: 87
Thanked:31
Posted: 03-19-08 16:31pm
To my knowledge, methadone isn't
addictive, and actually blocks the 'high'
one would get from drugs, while decreasing
withdrawal symptoms. So in that sense, it
can be very helpful.
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Chicagogirl
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Mar 2008 Posts: 16
Posted: 03-19-08 18:15pm
Methadone is addictive and the poster is
right it is trading one addiction for
another. You pretty much have to severe
yourself completely off of opiates of
every form to be 100% clean. It takes a
lot out of you and it's hell. Which is why
a lot of people chose to get on methadone
so they can function and begin their
detox.
|
Jacobs
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 19 Mar 2008 Posts: 6
Posted: 03-20-08 11:34am
I have never met anyone who has used
methadone to detox from another narcotic
and then was able to get off the
methadone. I am not saying it isn't
possible, only that I have never seen it.
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ldgcat5
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 14 Feb 2008 Posts: 30 Location: tampa, FL
Posted: 03-21-08 19:55pm
Methadone is addictive. It's a substitute
for heroin. My friend has had many
problems with this drug.
Like they said, it's switching one drug
for another. That isn't the answer.
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Galaxy
Supporter
Joined: 15 Mar 2006 Posts: 512 Location: U.K,
Thanks: 5
Thanked:0
Posted: 03-21-08 20:15pm
Bbfeet, has your daughter turned up yet?
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a sad mom
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Mar 2008 Posts: 3
status of your daughert Posted: 03-23-08 11:23am
I am in a similar situation almost. My
heart goes out to you so much as one
mother to another.
continue your meetings as suggested and
make it a priority. My kid won't even
speak to me and my ex husband knows all
about the addiction and leaves me out...my
other kid is now mad at me also. It is a
sad mess.
I suggest some one on one counseling
perhaps too. Like others, we want to
hear some good news. I hope you have
some to share with us. take good care.
God bless you.
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Galaxy
Supporter
Joined: 15 Mar 2006 Posts: 512 Location: U.K,
Thanks: 5
Thanked:0
Posted: 03-23-08 19:16pm
Yes, it is an awful situation and I can't
begin to understand what it must feel like
to be in bbffteet's situation, not knowing
where her daughter is.
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Chicagogirl
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Mar 2008 Posts: 16
Posted: 03-23-08 23:39pm
I logged onto this forum JUST to see if
there were any updates. You are in my
thoughts daily.
I hope you are well and you've had contact
with your daughter. reading your posts
makes me appreciate my parents soo very
much. I've called them daily and have
apologized to them as well. There is hope,
she will come around. Sometimes we have to
rock bottom with NO one to help us for it
happen.
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bbfeet9
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 05 Feb 2008 Posts: 62 Location: ,
Your all so kind.... Posted: 03-24-08 07:27am
Thank you all for the concern and prayers.
I have spoken to Julie. She is now on a
Soboxone treatement plan with a REAL
perscription. She dotoxed on Methodone in
the clinic, but didn't want to continure
on that, which led her to the sob. She
went to her court appearance and they
mandated her to drug court. If she is hot,
she goes to jail. There are days i don't
hear from her at all, which scares me to
death. I think she relapsed on Saturday
though. She went MIA all day. I thought
that odd as she promised her son a trip to
Horizon (skate park). She didn't call him
at all and he waited all day. He is only
7. Her mail box was full on her cell. When
i finally did talk to her, she told me she
was in the ER for her throat. She had a
high temp. I should not have done this but
i call the hospital, and suprprise
surprise, they never heard of her. Once
again, i felt my heart drop into my
stomach. I noticed her voice was crackly
and sluggish, just like before. I don't
know. At this point, she has no place to
live. She is going from friend to friend.
With all the bridges she has burned she
doesn't have many friends either. I wait
day to day. I'm very edgy. Thanks again
for all the kindness. Keep us in your
prayers.
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Galaxy
Supporter
Joined: 15 Mar 2006 Posts: 512 Location: U.K,
Thanks: 5
Thanked:0
Posted: 03-24-08 07:50am
Thanks for keeping us updated, bbfeet.
It is awful for you to have to watch your
daughter go through this, and I know you
are feeling it for her little boy, too.
Of course she is going to lie, and have
relapses and the whole deal, but you sound
strong, and you know that it is her
illness that is making her like that. You
seem to have the strength to cope, when
others might have thrown in the towel.
You have my admiration and respect for the
support you are giving her and her little
boy.
I think she will come back to you. At
least she knows she can, and that is a
huge factor in predicting the outcome.
She may have no friends left but you are
still there. There might just be that one
epiphanic moment when she realises that
she *can* turn back, that she does not
have to stay on this path.
Meantime, make sure you have your own
support structures in place, for this must
be taking a lot out of you. Keep in touch
with all your friends and tell them what
is happening. These days, no one is
immune to the possibility of drug abuse
reaching into your home and destroying
your family life.
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a sad mom
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Mar 2008 Posts: 3
blessings Posted: 03-24-08 15:42pm
I am glad you somewhat know where she is.
You are so right. We cannot fix them,
they have to hit bottom, whatever THEIR
bottom is...hopefully it is before they
die or go to prison for robbery to get
money to help their habit, or before they
get behind the wheel of a car and kill
someone or end up as a paraplegic
themselves, you can tell...I am a real
worrier. But, we (parents and others who
have gotten themselves straight) all know
that this stuff happens to many of those
who get so addicted to drugs.
my son is also on this site. He has a
post currently up there and cannot even
communicate with me at all. I really fear
for him. I will pray for your daughter.
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bbfeet9
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 05 Feb 2008 Posts: 62 Location: ,
Feel like i'm walking in circles.... Posted: 03-26-08 18:12pm
Well, Julie relapsed. Didn't make it to
drug court yesterday. I am furious because
the Court agreed to give her a second
chance to show up today. I don't know that
she went, tho she says she did. She calls
me today after 4 days of no talking to me
to ask if i would register her car!!! I
just about crapped myself!!
The car she is driving (With no license by
the way) has a very bad leaking fuel line.
She bops all over in this death trap
putting 2.00 worth of gas in it at a time.
She also carries a gas can in her back
seat. OMG, she smokes as well. I can just
see her doing it a cig out the window
and....can't even say it.
I just want to go to bed and pulll the
covers over my head. My hub is getting
quite disgusted with me, and my lack of
sexual desire has got him in a tither. I
can't blame him at all. I am thankful for
all your advice.
