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Scratching has become an addiction

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Besatine

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Scratching has become an addiction
Posted: 08-04-08 00:42am

Hello, everyone.
I am nervous about writing this, but I guess I have nothing to fear. I know that my case is not serious, but I am still worried about my actions and the future. I am 21 and have only been inflicting harm upon myself for about 1 1/2 years. However, I have always liked pain. As a child, sometimes I would bite my hand for fun or stick pins under my skin once in a while. More recently, I have been picking at hair on my face or using a tweezers to pull out hair on my stomach or face. I just realized that it is actually a painful action. A couple of years ago, I would sometimes slap my arms or use a scissors to scrape my arms (doing no damage). Then later, I did actually cut my ankles badly three days in a row, but I was able to stop. I still continued to sometimes do minor harm. Then several months later, I cut a couple of more times. I was able to stop that again, but I still am hurting myself now. I started scratching my arm and sometimes, biting or hitting/slapping it. Currently, I use keys to scratch my arm, but I try not to do it badly enough to bleed. There is my history. Originally when I started, it was to feel something or to release tension from anxieties or anger, but now that is not the case. I feel like I am addicted. All I want to do is scratch myself. I love seeing the marks on my arm (I just scratch my left arm for some reason). I have begun to not only do it every day, but I do it whenever I have the chance. I am really scared. I know that I am not in any real danger right now, but I know that this is not good, and I know that I shouldn't be doing it. I had gone through some hard times during the last several years, but now I am doing fine psychologically and am very happy. I really am doing well. However, I am just so used to the feeling and love it so much, that I can't let it go, even if I don't really need it. I am working on stopping. I'm sorry this is so long, but I thought maybe someone could help me or at least tell me something about this feeling of needing to do it without any real motive. I do have a couple of confidants, and I will get connected with a counselor as soon as I can. Thank you all very much. I wish you all well. God bless you.
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PestimisticAngel

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Joined: 27 May 2008
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Location: Jamaica, New York United States of America
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Posted: 08-29-08 18:03pm

I think yea you should speak with a consuler but most of all just try to do other things with your time, when you have the urge or find yourself grabing the keys well start head out the door and go driving to the grocery to shop, visit a friend and spend the night and TELL THEM how your feeling and what you were about to do ask for there support MAKE SURE that they are supportive may be some of the confidants that you were talking about earlier
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Users who thank PestimisticAngel for this post: Besatine 
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