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signs of bpd?

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halfemptyheart

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 May 2008
Posts: 3
signs of bpd?
Posted: 05-13-08 14:53pm

i dont know what to do or who to go to...and im hoping someone can help me. im 26 yrs old and have been having problems as long as i can remember but they have only started to worsen in the last 5 yrs...i can say its the worst when im under the tiniest amount of stress and that is usually at work somedays im fine laughing and joking around , flirting with the guys i work with, and then other days its all tears and wanting to hurt myself ...hating myself and everything else in the world...it gets to the point where i want to walk in front of a car or i think of swallowing a bottle of pills i see pictures in my head usually of blood , i also become very paranoid at work mostly i feel like people are talking about me or if theyre making comments about someone i feel like its directed at me and ill just completely break down its so embarrassing but i cant make it stop...ive also always feel like people are leaving me ...theres a guy at work that i like we flirt around alot and the other day he left without saying good bye and i felt like i had done something wrong or he was mad at me and i dont even know how to describe it really but i was just so upset over it when i know i shoudnt have been
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ive been looking around and i feel like its bpd or a mixture of things
im taking celexa 40mg and trazadone 200mg and its just not helping me theres more if you want to know anything just ask k thank you
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antigone

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Joined: 27 Jan 2008
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Location: IL
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Posted: 05-13-08 22:28pm

Have you talked to a psychiatrist? You are describing mixed moods. Perhaps you have a mood disorder. A psychiatrist could evaluate you and give you a diagnosis. With the proper medication you could have relief from the symptoms. I hope you will go see a psychiatrist. You don't have to live life feeling this way.
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halfemptyheart

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 May 2008
Posts: 3

Posted: 05-13-08 23:41pm

i checked myself into a clinic about 6 mo. ago and they told me that it was depression but i think i left out alot of stuff because i was so nervous and had so much to say....i want to go back but dont have the money to pay for it ...thanks for replying
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halfemptyheart

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 May 2008
Posts: 3

Posted: 05-14-08 00:42am

also i have been thinking ...my mood changes got worse after i started the meds...i remember the first month after they started to kick in that i talked alot more than usual a little to much actually and was happier...i thought that i was getting better...i had told my doctor how i felt and he told me that was good....could he have been wrong because i read that ssri can trigger bipolar disorder...(my grandma was bipolar from what ive heard)
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