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Taking care of yourself
Posted: 03-28-08 04:53am
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How do you, as a caregiver, take care of
yourself?
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^Serenity^
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Posted: 03-28-08 08:10am
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This is a tough question. I end up venting
to my husband about the latest event I've
encountered with my grandmother or mom. I
also try to remind myself that this
happens as we age, it will happen to a lot
of us. I've been caring for the elderly
for years but it is a whole different
story when it's someone in your family.
Sometimes a good cry gets me out that funk
and back to reality..Does that make sense?
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Seraph
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
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Posted: 03-28-08 09:25am
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I wonder if it's not perhaps, the amount
of time you have been doing it. You might
not realise it, but it might have been
just as difficult with strangers in the
beginning. As you take care of your own
family more frequently it would, not
necesarily get easier to do, but
definately easier to "handle".
My Biokineticist spoke to my about that
the other day. It is sometimes very
draining to her, not physically but
mentall, especially with problem cases
(Which now includes yours truely). She
says that most of the time, she would get
home and just not feel like doing
anything. She struggles to explain it to
her family and friends...
She had done boxing for quite a while and
that used to help her a lot...but the
patients is getting more as she has now
gone from being an intern to a regular at
the Biokineticks centre.
There is one day at the Biokineticist that
I just have to share with you 
Due to the marfans, I am a very tall guy
and even though I am scrawny, I have a
very large chest and wide shoulders, so I
don't look "weak". My Biokinetecist on
the other hand is a head shorter than my
shoulder and has a very "petite" build.
As I am lying flat on my back on the
exercise matt, one of the other
lady-patients walks by and goes "Oh my
word! I have never seen such a huge guy
being manhandled by someone of your
size!".
In the moment, it was really
hillarious...I think for any other guy it
would have been quite embarresing but
strangely enough, it didn't bother me in
that way 
But I think it does make sense that close
family will allways upset you more than
"strangers".
You should also count your self lucky,
rather than embarresd by the fact that you
can just sit down and cry out all those
painfull feelings... It's definately
doing you more good than bad
* Huge Hugs * & * Big Respect *
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Tmddyan
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Posted: 03-28-08 13:21pm
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yeah tough question. ive gotten tired of
taking care of myself in a way. i have to
do it. i just dont do enough for my self
---and i should. i take care of my guys
more than i do myself.
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^Serenity^
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Posted: 04-25-08 20:04pm
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It's been a while since any replies on
this topic. I haven't had much time to
take care of me...in the time I have had,
I've been sitting outside trying to
relax.
I've been through a few deaths this past
week (3 in 5 days).
To say the least it was and still is a
rough time. I'm trying to stay upbeat for
my grandmother, she lost her brother. now
she is having an emotional time. I wish I
could be there for her more. It's so hard
to be in many places at once and when
other family members don't help out it
makes it very tough on the ones that are
there.
In response Seraph's post...Thank you. It
was and still is tough when I lost a
client. Some of them become "family." When
we spend 30 hours a week with them you
really get to know them and they know you.
You share stories and it is very
heartwarming to know we are helping to
make their final years a little more
comforting.
Tmddyan...you need to take care of you
also...I know I need to do the same. We
all have big hearts to this type of work
whether we get paid or not, it is built in
us to be caregivers.
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Seraph
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
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Posted: 04-29-08 01:28am
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*HUGS* Butterfly.
Hope you are doing o.k. It must be really
tough to lose so many in such a short
time.
It's really saddening when family don't
seem to care. My grandma recently
collapsed so we toke her to the hospital.
When an old person falls down, it usually
means major trouble, so we notified the
family. My aunt arrived and sat through
all the tests and x-rays but when all came
through clean, she went ballistic and
screamed at us for "wasting her time" and
then later on, she screamed and yelled at
my grandma for not looking after her self.
Now, my grandma has made us promise that
we would never again notify my aunt of any
health problems that she is having...
All of the best to you guys. You are
doing a huge service to those in need!
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Tmddyan
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Posted: 04-29-08 10:22am
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| butterfly6169
wrote: |
Tmddyan...you need to take care of you
also...I know I need to do the same. We
all have big hearts to this type of work
whether we get paid or not, it is built in
us to be
caregivers. |
yeah i know---i have sever tmd---ive had
it all my life among other things---im
tired of blendng things,shoping for things
i can eat and walking out emptyhanded
cause its all to hard---i just wanna be
"normal" I have to go throughgreat lengths
to take care of myself---im just a little
tired of doing it
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^Serenity^
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Posted: 04-29-08 10:24am
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Seraph
Thanks for the hugs.. I'm doing OK.
Your aunt sounds like mine but my aunt
wouldn't even go to the hospital, she'd
say call if it's anything important. We
already said if something happens they
will be the last to know and some of the
"family" members won't give us their
numbers so they can read it in the
newspaper. It's really sad things have to
be this way but it's what they want.
I'm glad your grandma is OK. Keep an eye
on her and keep us posted, please. Does
she have any help coming to her home
(nurses, homemaker or companion)? It helps
to know that for a few hours someone is
there to help us out.
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^Serenity^
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Posted: 04-29-08 10:26am
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| Tmddyan
wrote: | | butterfly6169
wrote: |
Tmddyan...you need to take care of you
also...I know I need to do the same. We
all have big hearts to this type of work
whether we get paid or not, it is built in
us to be
caregivers. |
yeah i know---i have sever tmd---ive had
it all my life among other things---im
tired of blendng things,shoping for things
i can eat and walking out emptyhanded
cause its all to hard---i just wanna be
"normal" I have to go throughgreat lengths
to take care of myself---im just a little
tired of doing it |
I understand...I'm here if you need to
talk.
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Tmddyan
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^Serenity^
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Tmddyan
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^Serenity^
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Posted: 05-07-08 13:28pm
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Hanging in there...
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Tmddyan
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aflsh
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Posted: 05-19-08 20:29pm
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Hi guys
Been busy working and getting my oldest
son ready for Grad.Hope everyone is well.
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^Serenity^
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Posted: 05-20-08 06:33am
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That's another part of caregiving..taking
care of the kids...my youngest is
graduating high school next month and my
oldest is graduating college next
week...happy and sad at the same
time...does that make sense?
aflsh
How you holding up emotionally with his
graduation?
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