Joined: 01 Jun 2006 Posts: 8331 Location: Floating on a cloud, United States
Thanks: 183
Thanked:14
Whoa Posted: 08-21-07 17:01pm
I'm officially freaked out.
Today was Alyvia's 1 year doctor's
appointment. It went just fine (she's
perfectly healthy and got 4 shots plus a
finger stick to check her iron), but as we
were driving away from the clinic, Aaron
asks me if I'd "like to get knocked up
again".
Errr, WHAT?! Who are you and what have you
done with my husband? He was detached
from the majority of my first pregnancy,
and has reacted with nothing but
nervousness every time I've had a
quote-unquote "scare" since having Alyvia.
And now out of nowhere he's okay with
having another? Random!
He says he doesn't want us to actively
"try", but that he doesn't want to prevent
either. One of those "it'll happen when it
happens" things, I guess. He wants our
kids to be somewhat close in age, and I
think it's finally dawned on him that, at
the earliest, Alyvia will be almost 2 when
she gets a brother or sister.
The thing is, though, we still haven't
bought a house, and I've been thinking a
lot lately about going back to school. I
really want to become a Labor &
Delivery nurse, and there are some great 2
year programs here in town. We didn't want
a large age gap between our babies though,
so I don't know if I want to wait 2 years.
Emotionally I feel ready for another, but
the idea of actually having another right
now when we're still not established is a
little bit scary.
I really think I'm in shock. I never,
ever, EVER expected those words to come
out of my husband's mouth before they came
out of mine first. I'm just so torn!
|
young Girl
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jun 2007 Posts: 13932 Location: everythings better in, texas USA
Thanks: 1
Thanked:0
Posted: 08-21-07 17:12pm
|
sillyakchick
Supporter
Joined: 12 Apr 2007 Posts: 2690
Thanks: 5
Thanked:0
Posted: 08-21-07 17:25pm
Umm, yeah. Whoa! I think my dh felt the
same way when I whispered "let's make a
baby" in his ear one day when we were
making love. Talk about erectile
dysfunction!
How do YOU feel about having another baby?
Alyvia is beautiful-you make lovely
babies, that's for sure. do you want them
to be that close in age?
|
AyaMiyaki
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Jun 2006 Posts: 8331 Location: Floating on a cloud, United States
Thanks: 183
Thanked:14
Posted: 08-21-07 17:41pm
I'm really torn. We're taking baby steps
towards possibly purchasing a house (the
owner needs to get it appraised, isn't
sure what he's going to sell it for, etc)
and I've been heavily leaning towards
going to school sometime in the next year
or so - when Alyvia is a bit more
independent and possibly potty trained.
The rational side of me is telling me we
should hold off until we're somewhat
stable.
And then there's the other half of me, the
one that's screaming "baby baby baby baby
baby!" I wanted my children to be close in
age. Aaron and his brother have a 5 year
age gap and they're not at all close. I
wanted my babies to be friends as well as
siblings, and it almost feels like there's
a clock ticking now.
And I know I'm going to sound like a
complete freak, but I'm looking forward to
going through labor again. Pregnancy I'm
not wild about, but I really want to labor
again. I did about 90% of my labor with no
pain meds, and I'd love to do it med-free
next time.
I guess both sides scare me to death. The
idea of having another baby when we're not
exactly settled is scary, and the idea of
waiting and my children possibly not
having that special bond is terrifying.
I'm extremely torn about it all.
|
young Girl
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jun 2007 Posts: 13932 Location: everythings better in, texas USA
Thanks: 1
Thanked:0
Posted: 08-21-07 17:46pm
well like he said he didnt want to so much
try but he didnt want to prevent it either
right?
maybe you should just go for it and when
it happens it is meant to happen
good luck whatever you decide to do!!!!!
im exited for you!!!!
|
AyaMiyaki
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Jun 2006 Posts: 8331 Location: Floating on a cloud, United States
Thanks: 183
Thanked:14
Posted: 08-21-07 17:56pm
Thanks!
|
Willa Weintraub
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 05 Mar 2007 Posts: 3399 Location: The Beach!
Thanks: 30
Thanked:46
Posted: 08-21-07 18:16pm
Wow cool! I was wondering when you guys
were gonna do it again
have another! have another!
|
Dale123
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Jul 2007 Posts: 697 Location: Barrie, On Canada
Posted: 08-21-07 18:22pm
Do you think that you would get the chance
to take this course again if you had
another child right now? Does your husband
know that you want to take this course?
Have you told him how you felt with the
first pregnancy? ALSO Would you still be
able to get a house if you had another
one. Oh yeah you could check out to see if
there are any courses that you could take
while you're pregnant or after you have
the baby.. (Online) Just so that when you
go to school you could go part time. I
don't know it's a huge choice! If you did
wait to have the other one then the baby
that you have now could be a great helper!
My friend has a children that are 6 weeks,
3 years old and 6 years old and they all
get along really well.. They 6 year old
plays with the 3 year old while mom is
breast feeding. They get along really well
They're great kids. And my friend finds it
nice to be home with all of them through
the summer, because pretyy soon they will
all be in school and then she will have
baby time while the other two are at
school. However, she has the summer off
with all three
|
mc4ever02
Supporter
Joined: 08 Feb 2007 Posts: 3636 Location: Orlando, FL Usa
Thanks: 5
Thanked:2
Posted: 08-21-07 18:38pm
Wow...ummm...wow. That is a big thing to
just throw out there like that, there are
just so many questions and variables that
go into 'baby making', ya know?
I do have to say that I think its great
that he's open to the idea without being
pushy. If you don't mind, I like to give
you my opinion. Honestly, while having a
house first is nice...you would have 36ish
weeks to get that straightened out. But,
if it's important to have it first, by all
means wait. Now, the school thing is
different. I think if it's important to
you, and it's something that you want to
do now...you might want to hold off for a
little while. I would like to point out
that I think you are a wonderful mother
and I am sure that you would be able to
handle two young children and school....it
would be hard. It really come down to what
you want NOW. It's all there for the
taking, you just need to prioritize what
you want. Does that make sense?
Anyway, I'm sure you'll make the right
choice. And there is no rush to decide.
Feel free to pm me if you want to talk
about it.
|
musikmaker
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 30 May 2006 Posts: 1757 Location: Chicago, US
Thanks: 10
Thanked:2
Posted: 08-21-07 18:59pm
WOW! I would be so amazed if my husband
actually wanted to start trying with the
next one.
I would be nice if your kids are close in
age though.
|
Sandbox Party
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 25 Jul 2006 Posts: 7276
Posted: 08-21-07 20:50pm
girl trust me... having two so close in
age is HARD. I'm in the middle of doing
it.
If i knew that i'd get caty (the exact
same girl) had i waited til Jacob was
about 4 or 5, i would have.
|
hopefulmjz
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 31 Mar 2005 Posts: 4777 Location: , USA
Thanks: 3
Thanked:11
Posted: 08-21-07 22:30pm
I say go for it! School is something that
can wait, but the age gap is something
that will only get bigger if you wait. And
since you want your kids close in age....a
baby soon would be great! Plus when you do
go to school, and your kids are with
grandparents, or with a sitter...they will
have each other to keep company and play
with.
Sandra, I thought you were gonna get IVF?
How you gonna manage that if these 2 are
already a challenge?
|
Sandbox Party
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 25 Jul 2006 Posts: 7276
Posted: 08-21-07 22:59pm
hopefulmjz
wrote:
Sandra, I thought you were
gonna get IVF? How you gonna manage that
if these 2 are already a
challenge?
never said i couldnt do it tho, did i?
What i choose to do is my business... as
is Lauras. I think she can do it. Shes a
strong person. Just offering advice.
If i didnt think i could do it, i wouldnt
be planning on paying upwards of 15 grand
to do so.
Thanks for the input.
|
hopefulmjz
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 31 Mar 2005 Posts: 4777 Location: , USA
Thanks: 3
Thanked:11
Posted: 08-21-07 23:02pm
|
Sandbox Party
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 25 Jul 2006 Posts: 7276
Posted: 08-21-07 23:14pm
hopefulmjz
wrote:
very mature. Hope you arent teaching your
daughter how to accept others opinions
*~*so well*~* lol.
^_^
anyway, Laura.. whatever you choose you
know we'll be right here for you if you
need us.
Some more than others obviously, since
they'd rather start trouble with people
than give helpful advice.
|
hopefulmjz
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 31 Mar 2005 Posts: 4777 Location: , USA
Thanks: 3
Thanked:11
Posted: 08-21-07 23:18pm
rainfire1424
wrote:
hopefulmjz
wrote:
very mature. Hope you arent teaching your
daughter how to accept others opinions
*~*so well*~* lol.
^_^
anyway, Laura.. whatever you choose you
know we'll be right here for you if you
need us.
Some more than others obviously, since
they'd rather start trouble with people
than give helpful
advice.
You're telling ME about maturity? This
coming from the one who walks around
shooting random strangers with squirt
guns, and prank calling people?
And I made 1 comment, and you are the one
that took it wrong that was MY opinion,
glad you accepted it. That's all I'm
saying because Laura doesn't deserve to
have her topic locked.
|
babygirl24
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Aug 2007 Posts: 48 Location: ,
Re: Whoa Posted: 08-21-07 23:36pm
umm.. i think if you want to go back to
school then do it 3 or 4 years isnt too
bad in a age diffrence me and my brother
are 13 years apart. but its your choice i
think you should follow your heart
|
amethyst eyes
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Nov 2006 Posts: 1339
Posted: 08-21-07 23:42pm
Get over yourself. She was merely asking
a question about information YOU put out
there.
As for having your kids close in age, me
and my brother are 6 years apart and are
extremely close were as my boyfriend and
his brother are less than two years and
can't get along for anything. It is all
about the indivual and how you raise them.
I would wait just so you can have the
stability. Just think about how good you
will feel have an money in the bank and
that security in case of an emergency.
(Just my opinion, it is your choice in the
end)
No matter what you know you will be a
great mom and can handle anything that
life throws at you.
|
Becky
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Jan 2006 Posts: 6225 Location: London, England
Thanks: 0
Thanked:7
Posted: 08-22-07 01:43am
it's completely up to you laura. i find
having a close age gap easy and i hear you
abou the age gap thing. when i was
considering have another baby i kept
panicking about the age gap. i would of
had three under three but as my little
girl passed away i kept worrying that my
fourth child would feel left out as layla
and logan have such a close age gap.
everyone is right though, you can go back
to studying a bit later on. i am planning
to go back again when the kids are at
school because i gave it a try last year
and it didn't work out for me.
|
AyaMiyaki
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Jun 2006 Posts: 8331 Location: Floating on a cloud, United States
Thanks: 183
Thanked:14
Posted: 08-22-07 08:27am
Thank you for the opinions, ladies!
We're going to hold off on trying for a
few months and see how things work out
with that house. We're trying not to get
our hopes up on it, but if the cards fall
just right... aaah, I can't even talk
about it without getting excited.
Anyway, we'll probably start trying by the
end of this year, and "not preventing"
now.
He was detached
from the majority of my first pregnancy,
and has reacted with nothing but
nervousness every time I've had a
quote-unquote "scare" since having Alyvia.
And now out of nowhere he's okay with
having another? Random!
