recently my fiance has gotten in a
traumatic car accident, after many
surgeries, 4 days later he was put on
morphine. he doesnt want me in the room
and thinks im going to pull his wires and
kill him. his family is jehovah witnesses
and says hes going back to the truth and
wants nothing to do with me. im sure hes
depressed, but my question is does anybody
know how morphine will affect a person?
why he is saying these things to me? will
he change his mind? im so confused.
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CarolDiane
Moderator
Joined: 23 Sep 2007 Posts: 2393 Location: ,
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I Hear Ya Posted: 09-23-07 17:30pm
I would say, don't start worring yet.
Sounds like the Morphine is talking and
not him. My mom did the same thing on a
similar IV pain med. I would not take his
words to heart right now. Hard core post
surgery drugs or in this case post truama
drugs have a different affect on everyone.
Personally, I think it is the drug
talking. Chill and relax and let this
person get well first before you make a
jump you might be sorry for.
BTW: Morphine does not usually come in
drip form. It is either on a pump (push on
command method) or what we call "IV Push"
where the doc order a shot throught the IV
line as he feels needed. Usually every
four to six hours depending on the
severity of the truama. Sometimes if the
truama is really bad they well put you in
a medically indused coma untill you are
out of the woods (so to speak).
MsSky
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lonestarguy
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jun 2007 Posts: 592 Location: , Hoosierland, USA
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Morphine Posted: 09-23-07 18:21pm
Hi....I think MsSky is correct about the
morphine talking instead of your fiance. I
was wounded in Vietnam and went through
several major operations and was put on
morphine.
The morphine causes terrible dreams and
disorients you to real life. I had trouble
distinguishing which people I knew and
trusted and my mind would make me
paranoid. My dad told me I thought he was
the President and one of the nurses was
the first lady. I also felt like I was in
a dream state much of the time.
I would not get too alarmed until he
starts to get better and they start to
wean him off morphine. He should return to
the guy you know. That morphine is very
good as a pain medication, but it is also
dangerous stuff.
Hope this helps. Good luck.
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hmagliocca10
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Sep 2007 Posts: 3
Thanks Posted: 09-23-07 19:02pm
i just found out today that he was taken
off the morphine. he has had a lot of
surgeries, and at this point im just
staying away because i dont want to set
him off. between the trauma, surgeries,
meds....obviously he has had it rough.
they called it a morphine drip, but yes it
was the button that he could push whenever
he felt pain, someone had to push it for
him, because his arms are broken, but
nevertheless, he seemed to be making
perfect sense when i talked to him, not
slurring his words, not like you would
assume it would seem like. either
way.......thanks for the advice.
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CarolDiane
Moderator
Joined: 23 Sep 2007 Posts: 2393 Location: ,
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You Are Right Posted: 09-23-07 19:39pm
He will seem like he is making sense.
There does not have to be any slurred
speach. It is just the reaction to the med
and that is normal. My mom seemed to be
with it too when she threw us out of the
room. I went right to the nurse and said,
I want her off of it right now! But, take
into consideration she was a post op
patient had having a hysterectomy. No
comparrsion to your fiance.
Just give him time to get through this. I
think part of this may be, that he feels
you won't love him any more. Looking at
the physcialogical side of this it makes
sense. Maybe he is taking it out on you so
he does not have to feel that you are with
him just as a care giver with sympathy. In
that case just give him alot of TLC that
he needs even if he tries to reject you.
But, don'nt be over pushy. That would not
be good either. Know when to draw the line
OK. From the sounds of it, he is not only
going through a very horrific physical
ordeal, he could be going though a
horrific mental ordeal along with it. This
is just my opinion and maybe some sunshine
for you. Hang in there OK. It will work
out.
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hmagliocca10
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Sep 2007 Posts: 3
... Posted: 09-25-07 16:07pm
so much for that idea. i see how the
morphine drugged him up, but hes off now,
and still has so much hatred towards me.
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CarolDiane
Moderator
Joined: 23 Sep 2007 Posts: 2393 Location: ,
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Thanked:156
I Still Stand On My Thought Posted: 09-25-07 16:23pm
OK, this first thing is, It is you that I
am worried about. This is not going to
happen over night. He is lashing out here.
This has nothing to do with him loving
you. Which I am sure he still does. He is
going through the grieving mode, and I
have been through this. He feels that you
will not love him anymore due to his near
fatal accident. Now you have to give him
some space. And you my dear need to seek
some counseling for this. Remember, this
is the person you are going to marry. This
happens and it is normal. He has alot of
healing to do. A lot (and I mean a lot) of
therapy ahead of him. You still have to be
buy his side. I is not going to be easy.
You giving up on him way to fast here. Ya
know grieving does not have to be about
death. It is about loosing ones ability to
be the person you once were and the life
you use to lead. Once he goes through
rehab and starts getting his life back
totgether you will start to see small
sutle changes in him. I still say he will
come around. Now, after he regains most of
his life back. If he still feels this way,
then and only then would I give it up.
Now, on the other side of the coin. You
are going to have a lot to deal with here.
You are going to need the streangh to
either stick with him or walk away. That
has to be your choice. Nevertheless, this
is going to be just as hard on you as it
is him.
If you need someone to talk to, please PM
me and seek a counselor. If you love him
enough, you will see him though this.
Now, it is time to give him some space.
Stay away for awhile. I know it is going
to be hard but you have to do it. This
will give him time to regroup and think
more clearly.
I am worried about you. Very worried.
Please keep in touch.
