Am I normal if I'm 16 and I've never had girlfriend, sex, or kiss?
Yes
100%
[ 6 ]
No
0%
[ 0 ]
Total Votes : 6
Author
Message
MMAFighter
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Sep 2007 Posts: 359 Location: WA, USA
How to Get Over Lack of Love From Girls Posted: 09-23-07 23:23pm
I'm 16
and I've never had a girlfriend before,
never had sex, never been kissed, been
hugged 4 times. According to world
almanac and scientific american, 51.9% of
11th graders aren't virgins and only 34%
of kids graduate from high school as
virgins. I feel
left out and unwanted by the women and
sexually inadequate and I feel unmanly as
a result. I'm almost developing a hate
for girls. Especially those cute
cheerleaders that go after only the
football player and have sex a lot.
I really don't know how to get a gf or how
to get over my frustration. Here's some
basic info on me to make commenting
easier.
Height: 5-10.5 (with head shaved and socks
off)
Weight:140-145lbs
Age: 16
Ethnicity: 63/64-chinese, 1/64 caucasion,
chinese for all normal purposes
Grades: 4.0 cumalitive, going for IB
diploma
Built: Athletic, six pack
Sports: Mixed martial arts, weight
lifting/general conditioning, running,
swimming
Personal problems/emotional trauma: Have a
fair amount, but I'm currently seeing my
school counsellor
Facial handsomeness: Varies tremendously,
look like an angel when I take time to
properly groom myself, look like a freak
when I'm tired or forget to comb my hair
(which is a good amount of the time)
Fashion sense: Don't care about fashion
|
young Girl
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jun 2007 Posts: 13932 Location: everythings better in, texas USA
Posted: 09-23-07 23:25pm
hun you may want to put this in
relationship forum. youll get more
answers
plus
the womens chat forum is for women only
men cannot post here
just like women cant post in mens chat!!!
|
young Girl
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jun 2007 Posts: 13932 Location: everythings better in, texas USA
Posted: 09-23-07 23:27pm
and hey i was a cheerleader and i NEVER
dated football players
|
Tylanas
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 Jul 2005 Posts: 12985
Thanks: 3
Thanked:0
Posted: 09-24-07 08:42am
Hey, I never had a boyfriend or kissed
until I was 18 and in college!!
I had no use for boyfriends in highschool.
I got one in college because there I met
guys that weren't total jerks.
I never kissed or dated anyone in
highschool.
I didn't have sex until I was 20. Its my
personal opinion that 16 is far too young
to be having sex anyway! (there are
exceptions but most teens are too young.)
Just because all of your friends are being
irresponsible and having sex doesn't mean
you have to be! You simply have no reason
to be dating right now.
You feel unmanly? That's because you're
not a man yet. Neither are your friends,
no matter how many vaginas their penis has
been in. I've never met a man in
highschool aside from the teachers. You
are KIDS. There also ain't any women in
your student body! All those females are
GIRLS and you are a BOY and guess what?
That's okay! Be a kid for god's sake!
Cheerleaders (for the most part,
Girlfriend!) are slu-s and who-es! Don't
try dating them anyway. Girls like them
are shallow, mean, annoying, and only care
about their fingernail polish. I hate them
too!!
|
young Girl
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jun 2007 Posts: 13932 Location: everythings better in, texas USA
Posted: 09-24-07 12:33pm
Eiri
wrote:
Hey, I never had a boyfriend
or kissed until I was 18 and in college!!
I had no use for boyfriends in highschool.
I got one in college because there I met
guys that weren't total jerks.
I never kissed or dated anyone in
highschool.
I didn't have sex until I was 20. Its my
personal opinion that 16 is far too young
to be having sex anyway! (there are
exceptions but most teens are too young.)
Just because all of your friends are being
irresponsible and having sex doesn't mean
you have to be! You simply have no reason
to be dating right now.
You feel unmanly? That's because you're
not a man yet. Neither are your friends,
no matter how many vaginas their penis has
been in. I've never met a man in
highschool aside from the teachers. You
are KIDS. There also ain't any women in
your student body! All those females are
GIRLS and you are a BOY and guess what?
That's okay! Be a kid for god's sake!
Cheerleaders (for the most part,
Girlfriend!) are slu-s and who-es! Don't
try dating them anyway. Girls like them
are shallow, mean, annoying, and only care
about their fingernail polish. I hate them
too!!
yeah most of the girls on cheer were like
that too... i cant stand the ditzy act
they try t put on that makes us look
stupid
"and so like i was like totally
like...duh?!"
who needs to talk like that?
to the OP eiri is right
be a kid! dont try and grow up so fast!
because when it happens and its time to
grow up life gets tough...its not easy and
its not fun.
|
MMAFighter
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Sep 2007 Posts: 359 Location: WA, USA
Posted: 09-24-07 16:53pm
I know that I should wait...but, I feel
like I'm weaker than all the boys and
girls that are having sex since I'm not as
sexually aggressive as them. Should I
feel that way?
|
young Girl
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jun 2007 Posts: 13932 Location: everythings better in, texas USA
Posted: 09-24-07 16:55pm
MMAFighter
wrote:
I know that I should
wait...but, I feel like I'm weaker than
all the boys and girls that are having sex
since I'm not as sexually aggressive as
them. Should I feel that
way?
hell no!!! why should you feel weaker?
you know im 16 and guess what i was
havening sex!
and guess what?
...im pregnant from it
|
everyday_struggle
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 30 Jul 2007 Posts: 304
Re: How to Get Over Lack of Love From Girls Posted: 09-24-07 17:04pm
MMAFighter
wrote:
Fashion sense: Don't care about
fashion
aight, so your an asian cat. I think you
can work a smart, cool, too fast too
furious asian thing to your benefit. To
let you know FASHION COUNTS. you gotta
dress to impress. Girls can tell if your
having sex or not just by how you dress
and smell and if you want to have sex with
them, you better act like you are or
already have. It would also help to make
freinds with some of the football players
that way you can get some shrapnel from
whatever bomb nani they get. (pm me for
the meaning of shrapnel). These
cheerleaders are ditzes, just look at the
comments from the obvious cheerleader.
Dont go for those type of girls because
they just want to be miss popular and get
a lot of attention. Thats why they date
the football players and end up getting
knocked up. You dont want to deal with
that. My advice is to start with some of
the chicks that dont have that much self
esteem and then learn how to talk to them,
that way you can be comfortable with girls
and climb up the ladder to talking to the
ones you do want.
|
entices1
Supporter
Joined: 25 Apr 2007 Posts: 120 Location: North Florida, USA
Re: How to Get Over Lack of Love From Girls Posted: 09-24-07 18:55pm
First off, can we eliminate the flaming.
please? Thank you.
MMA Fighter:
First off, I'm definitely old enough to be
your mom so I can give you adivice from
"the other side". You also may consider
me to be a bit old-fashioned in my views
but they've gotten me this far.
Your unhappiness is timeless. I mean, I
went through it when I was your age and
I'm certain that generations before me
(even the dinosaurs!) went through it.
Except maybe the sex part.
I'm not entirely certain what the rush to
have sex is. If you do everything now,
what will you have to look forward to?
There's a difference between having sex
and sharing physical love. Which are you
looking for? Sex for the sake of sex can
leave one feeling very empty afterwards.
I speak from experience. Sex for the sake
of sex involves no intimacy, just hormones
calling to each other. IMHO you're too
young to be doing this because of all of
the permanent diseases you can catch from
having unprotected sex, much less becoming
a father at 16. Think about it--is it
really worth taking chances just to "do
it" (as it were).
You know, it's very easy to lie on
surveys--just because they're in Big Name
Magazines doesn't give them credibility.
The statistics are based solely on answers
and if the answers aren't true the
statistics aren't worth anything.
When I was in high school I never dated
anyone. I was "one of the boys". My
interests were more male-oriented (I loved
professional baseball and could hold my
own with the best of them). I wasn't
interested in dressing up, using makeup
and playing the silly games that girls
would use to go after boys. Plus, I was
in the "smart group", so to speak and we
were interested in other things.
Whilst it was great to be "one of the
boys" it was also a killer. One of the
guys in the group I really liked for much
of high school. He considered me "a pal"
only and I'd listen to his girlfriend
problems. And absolutely died inside.
More than once I cried myself to sleep
because no one expressed an interest in
me.
In senior year I met a friend of a friend
of mine on a school field trip. We hit it
off grandly and towards the end of the
year we exchanged class rings (do they
still do that any more?). We were "going
steady" and when my male friends saw his
ring on my finger they suddenly realized I
was A Female and dropped me. I felt like
I had a rare and possibly communicable
disease. I couldn't stand being
ostracized so I gave the guy his ring back
after five days. I hated myself for what
I'd done to him--dropping him for this
group.
You're judging yourself by artificial
standards. I know you've heard this
before in a different context, but jumping
off a 10-story building defined you as a
"man" would you do it (even if everyone
else was doing it)?
A Real Man is comfortable in his own skin.
He is in touch with his feelings and is a
friend to himself. He accepts his good
and bad points (and works on the bad
ones). He doesn't follow the crowd for
the sake of following it and doesn't have
to explain to anyone his reason for not
following. He defines himself in terms of
himself and not in terms of anyone else.
He accepts people for who they are (he may
not necessarily *like* a particular person
but acceptance is not the same as
liking).
A Real Man is multifaceted. He is always
interested in learning something big or
small. He moves forward and looks ahead.
He has a plan for his life (alhtough that
plan doesn't have to be for the rest of
his life, it can be for the semester, for
the year) and he is flexible enough to
revise his plan in the event he finds out
the plan isn't working.
You may possibly have a strike against you
because you're bi-racial and people at
your age can be extremely cruel about
race. Young people place importance on
things that older people have gotten past:
looks, money (often reflected in the way
one dresses)--stuff that fade over time.
Older people (maybe about 10 years older
or so than you) start to look for
character, honesty, friendship--the
intangible things that don't fade.
The semester has started. How about
joining a club or an organization, or
leaning a new skill? You'd be with other
people who had stuff in common with you
and form new friendships. THE BASIS TO
ANY RELATIONSHIP IS FRIENDSHIP!! Maybe
form a study group with people from a
class, males and females.
You talked about the cheerleaders.
They're what I call the "first row" women
(think of bleachers). Everyone sees them
and many are shallow enough not to see
past them. Take comfort in the fact that
many of them have reached their peak in
high school and will on the downward slide
for the rest of their lives.
Now, look in the rows above the
cheerleaders. There are all kinds of
women. They may not have the looks that
the first-row females have and are
probably somewhat shy. But I'll bet
there's someone up there who is just dying
to go out with you but she's too shy to
even approach you. She may even cry
herself to sleep because no one notices
her.
Do you make yourself approachable? It
*is* important to keep good grooming
because, as the commercial said, you only
get one chance to make a first impression.
It's like this throughout life--even in
job interviews. Do you walk around like
you have a storm cloud over you? If you
do, STOP IT! It's possible you could be
sending out signals saying "Stay Away".
Project an air of confidence (even if it's
just an act). Show people that you are
someone worth knowing.
You seem like a very likeable young man,
just a little frustrated. I'll bet you're
very smart, too (seem lately that Asians
have it all over Westerners in terms of
getting good grades). You have a great
deal to offer some lucky young woman but
it may take a little time. It's OK,
really it is. I think you're putting too
much pressure on yourself (I know, it's
easy to say because I'm not in your
position).
I didn't have my first "True Love" until I
was in second year of University. It was
also my first Big Heart Break.
Relationships are like roses--they look
beautiful but they have thorns that can
hurt. Every relationship has a 50/50
chance of working out (and I include
parting as friends and maintaining that
friendship for the rest of your life--I
have some of those). I didn't get married
until I was 38 and actually wasn't ever
planning on getting married.
I was happy being by myself. I
accomplished many things I wouldn't have
otherwise. Yes, I was alone but I wasn't
lonely (well, sometimes I was). There's a
big difference between "alone" and
"lonely". You can be in a large crowd and
feel terribly lonely. You can be alone
and be terribly happy.
I'm sorry for the rambling. I have a
migraine coming on and need to address
it.
Good luck, keep posting and ignore the
flamers.
|
young Girl
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jun 2007 Posts: 13932 Location: everythings better in, texas USA
Re: How to Get Over Lack of Love From Girls Posted: 09-24-07 18:59pm
everyday_struggle
wrote:
MMAFighter
wrote:
Fashion sense: Don't care about
fashion
aight, so your an asian cat. I think you
can work a smart, cool, too fast too
furious asian thing to your benefit. To
let you know FASHION COUNTS. you gotta
dress to impress. Girls can tell if your
having sex or not just by how you dress
and smell and if you want to have sex with
them, you better act like you are or
already have. It would also help to make
freinds with some of the football players
that way you can get some shrapnel from
whatever bomb nani they get. (pm me for
the meaning of shrapnel). These
cheerleaders are ditzes, just look at the
comments from the obvious cheerleader.
Dont go for those type of girls because
they just want to be miss popular and get
a lot of attention. Thats why they date
the football players and end up getting
knocked up. You dont want to deal with
that. My advice is to start with some of
the chicks that dont have that much self
esteem and then learn how to talk to them,
that way you can be comfortable with girls
and climb up the ladder to talking to the
ones you do want.
MMA fighetr boys dont have a scent to them
to let us know if your having sex or not
we also cant tell by what your wearing if
your a virgin or not
please dont take advice from this man who
hits women because he doesnt want them to
snitch on him for doing drugs...
|
Marfa2107
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Jul 2007 Posts: 1552 Location: Galena, Kansas United States
Posted: 09-24-07 19:04pm
MMAFighter:
Suzy is right, girls cannot tell if a guy
is a virgin or not..
not by the way you dress
by the way you smell
or by the way you walk..
nothing tells us if you have had sex.....
but one thing that we do like is
confidence
|
young Girl
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jun 2007 Posts: 13932 Location: everythings better in, texas USA
Posted: 09-24-07 19:06pm
Marfa2107
wrote:
MMAFighter:
Suzy is right, girls cannot tell if a guy
is a virgin or not..
not by the way you dress
by the way you smell
or by the way you walk..
nothing tells us if you have had sex.....
but one thing that we do like is
confidence
yep confidence is a great quality in a
guy!!! we also like guys that act
respectful to women.
|
MMAFighter
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Sep 2007 Posts: 359 Location: WA, USA
Posted: 09-24-07 19:51pm
Confidence sounds easy but is kind of hard
for me since I have some personal problems
that I have finally started to confront
even though they've been building up for a
long time. I'll try to improve my
confidence...
|
Marfa2107
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Jul 2007 Posts: 1552 Location: Galena, Kansas United States
Posted: 09-24-07 19:55pm
that's good that you are taking a step
forward in helping yourself!!
plus, you are only 16...
you have so much time..
don't worry about having a girlfriend, or
having sex, or being in a relationship...
it'll happen when it's supposed to..
just realize how lucky you are..
you aren't in the running for any STD's or
unwanted teen pregnancies..
don't have sex b/c everyone is...
have sex b/c you love the girl and you are
serious about the relatoinship
=)
|
young Girl
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jun 2007 Posts: 13932 Location: everythings better in, texas USA
Posted: 09-24-07 20:22pm
MMAFighter
wrote:
Confidence sounds easy but
is kind of hard for me since I have some
personal problems that I have finally
started to confront even though they've
been building up for a long time. I'll
try to improve my
confidence...
hun we can help with those personal
problems you are haveing
we are here for you
if you need anything PM me ill be glad to
help!
|
Tylanas
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 Jul 2005 Posts: 12985
Thanks: 3
Thanked:0
Posted: 09-24-07 21:43pm
MMAFighter
wrote:
I know that I should
wait...but, I feel like I'm weaker than
all the boys and girls that are having sex
since I'm not as sexually aggressive as
them. Should I feel that
way?
NO. You shouldn't.
If you could benchpress one of them, then
you're not weaker! If you can get better
grades than them, then you're not weaker!
If you can avoid STD's and unwanted
babies, then you are not weaker!
Honestly sex is just sex, it's not the
end-all-be-all. You do not need the worry
of "oh man, is my bg preggers?" or "do I
have herpes!?" right now.
Lay back, relax, and meet your right hand.
Masturbate. Make your own world! Have the
perfect fantasy girlfriend. Don't bother
with girls your age, for the most part
they are way to immature and shallow to
bother dating.
|
everyday_struggle
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 30 Jul 2007 Posts: 304
Posted: 09-25-07 11:27am
MMAFighter
wrote:
Confidence sounds easy but
is kind of hard for me since I have some
personal problems that I have finally
started to confront even though they've
been building up for a long time. I'll
try to improve my
confidence...
What i meant to say is that females have a
sixth sense about guys. They simply can
look you up and down and see what your all
about. You have to look presentable and
clean. Fashion does matter because if you
look like a bum, you arent going to be
attracting any girls.
|
young Girl
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jun 2007 Posts: 13932 Location: everythings better in, texas USA
Posted: 09-25-07 12:07pm
MMA fighetr Pm me anytime ya need lol
sorry i didnt get back to you til this
morning i had to get to bed last night
Honestly I was 19 before I got a
girlfriend and a kiss and everything else.
There is nothing at all wrong with you.
Instead of jumping to any girl, wait for
that right girl to come along and you wont
be disappointed
Things happen when they happen, just be
yourself and good things will come from
it.
|
Mikolas
Supporter
Joined: 02 Aug 2007 Posts: 560 Location: Buffalo University, Hands off! My trained killer kitten has its aim set upon you!
Thanks: 13
Thanked:0
Posted: 10-10-07 12:22pm
Jeez man, you really want this -_-. Haha
weaker? I don't know if you are talking
about physically, but that would make no
sense. If you are saying you feel like you
are below them because of their sexual
experience, well, I understand that
because I'm a 19 year old version. But uuh
honestly, I feel superior to them because
I know that I had the mind of discipline
and control that other guys my age
couldn't control or resist because they
thought with their penis (I'm not talking
about you guys who decided to lose it to
somebody important, just one of those
American Pie scenarios). They are thus
just people who gave in to their primal
instincts, which there is nothing wrong
about, but makes those who chose not to
give in, unique.
As the ladies said, no its not as if women
can tell what you've done based on looks,
but they are people to and most people
judge from first impressions regardless of
whatever they may say. All, I swear it,
all the ladies I met in college first
year, that I've talked to about what they
thought of me, told me that at first they
thought I was a man hoe, a player, a fly
party boy, etc. Then they were very
surprised to hear that I don't quite party
so much and I don't drink, and I have kept
my virginity. A few thought I was lieing
and got kind of pissed off thinking that I
was just trying to be a player and make
myself look all clean and innocent. None
has said "I don't know you that well so I
never assumed that you drink, had sex
multiple times, and party".
Fashion... if you are just trying to find
"the one", then sentimentally and
idealistically speaking all such
superficial aspects should not be
important. They must like you for you, as
the people in this forum must have said a
million times. But from what it looks
like, you aren't looking for the one, you
just want to meet girls, meet girls, talk
to girls, lose it to girls, meet more
girls. Sorry, but you definitely aren't
writing this for assistance to find the
one and only.
If that is your goal, fashion and your
presentation are important, that is life,
whether its for a job interview, a social
dinner, wedding invite, or meeting
girls/guys, your first impressions will
make or break you.
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Schizophreniahealth
This page was last updated on June 11, 2008
I'm 16
and I've never had a girlfriend before,
never had sex, never been kissed, been
hugged 4 times. According to world
almanac and scientific american, 51.9% of
11th graders aren't virgins and only 34%
of kids graduate from high school as
virgins. 
I really don't know how to get a gf or how
to get over my frustration. Here's some
basic info on me to make commenting
easier.
