I'm soon 12 weeks pregnant. I had no support from the very 1st minute and now it seems everybody turned his back against me. I live far away from my home country with my boyfriend. I know noone here so I' m practically alone. I have noone to talk to. So i thought I would tell my woe here. We weren't planning a baby but we've decided to keep it eventually. I have to mention that i live in a very small town where without spealing the language I have no possibility to get a job. So i live on my boyfriend's money. I totally depend on him. We had a great relationship but about a month ago everything changed. He has severe clinical depression btw. He's been in the hospital and since he got back I can't recognise him anymore.This is not important now. The problem is that he had to make a doctor s appointment and he kept forgetting it for weeks. Now he finally called but I have to wait another month till a doctor can see me. I told him I can't wait that long and asked him to find me another doctor. His answer was that I should do it myself. Which is impossible.I know nobody, I'm new here , don't speak the language.We also have a cat and i should get myself checked because of that. I feel left alone and desperate and noone can help me, and the worst thing is I can't help myself either in this situation. He is not making any plans, he's just waiting for us to die. He doesn't even care if we have anything to eat or not. I'm living on bread and butter for weeks now...I love my baby and I'm really worried about him.I can't just wait to die....I have a child to raise. I'd have so many things to say...but i don't think this is the place for it. I'm also very nauseaus and weak all day. I can hardly drink water. it is a very difficult pregnancy so far...I really feel like our only option is killing myself and then the baby would die too. And i won\t have to live with the guilt if something bad happened to my baby....i don't know how to go on....just don't know.Can anyone give me some advice? I'd really appreciate it.