the Man I Love Is a Skitso Posted: 10-11-07 10:36am
i met a guy via chatting. We are thousand
miles apart. We both fell in love to each
other, until one day, we have decided to
meet up and he promised that he will come
over to my country. I was so delighted and
looking forward meeting the Man i Love.
One morning, i recieved a message that he
cant come because his doctor didnt allow
him. He then divulged bout his sickness
that he is a skitso and under medication.
I was really devastated! He should have
told bout his sickness from the begginning
of our relationship. Now, my problem is im
still so in love with the person despite
of his sickness that i feel and believe
that im even more responsible most
especially now that i know bout his
sickness. Im so concern if i will leave
him bcoz i know that he needs me. I love
and pity the man i truly love. but , how
bout me? what are the things to expect if
i decided to live with a man that has
skitso? Should i take the risk? or follow
what my heart tells me?...to be with
him.... please help
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redeme
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Aug 2007 Posts: 71 Location: australia
Posted: 10-11-07 12:38pm
really it depends on the serverity of his
condition (if hes violent ect ect) ..if
youve met him previous to his illness and
not just talked to him on the net go for
it if you 2 love each other. but schizos
are known paranoid/delusional people so be
prepared for whatever symptoms and
situations his mind decides to have or
create. ive lost alot of people, friends
and relationships because of schizophrenia
even before i was diagnosed.
so in short to answer your question, its
probably not a very good idea to get
involved with someone thousands of miles
away who has a serious mental illness..
but hey some people find love in the
strangest places. hope it all works out
-Rdm.
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PsychNurse007
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 15 Oct 2007 Posts: 14
Posted: 10-15-07 01:07am
It is hard to divulge all personal
information when you first meet someone.
And be honest. If during your first
conversation he told you he had a serious
mental illness you probably would have
stopped all contact with him, this is
probably why he waited to tell you. To
make your decision you need to know the
severity of his symptoms. Most people
with psychotic disorders are not violent
or bad people. Symptoms can range in
severity from being well controlled with
medication and therapy, to long-term
institutionalization. Find out more on
how serious his illness is. Also, you
mentioned that you "love and pity" him.
Love cannot be based on pity and you must
realize that while being in a relationship
with him may improve both of your lives
and be a source of happiness for both of
you, that you cannot "fix" him and things
will be very hard if you try to enter a
romantic relationship with him if you
approach it from from a patient/therapist
viewpoint. I would not look at the actual
illness as much as i would look at other
aspects of his life. Can he hold down a
job? Can he provide for himself? Does he
have friends and family? These aspects of
his life can probably give you better
insight as to what kind of person he is.
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Georgia59
Moderator
Joined: 11 Apr 2007 Posts: 5250 Location: Along the Mississippi, USA
Thanks: 60
Thanked:27
Posted: 10-18-07 12:44pm
Some people with schizophrenia manage to
keep it treated, under control, and live a
perfectly happy life. Find out more about
his condition, his treatment, and see if
you could handle it.
|
Birch
Supporter
Joined: 07 Nov 2005 Posts: 3736 Location: A perpetual state of busy, In the land of Tired.
Thanks: 75
Thanked:9
Posted: 10-18-07 18:08pm
Did he say he's "skitzo" or has
schizophrenia? There are other diseases
that "skitzo" could be, in which case you
would need to be aware of the
differences.
Do you want to be with a man you pity?
|
Philo
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 12 Mar 2007 Posts: 331 Location: Montreal
Thanks: 4
Thanked:0
Posted: 10-19-07 11:09am
Birch
wrote:
Do you want to be with a man
you pity?
Or, do you want to pity the man that you
love?
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Georgia59
Moderator
Joined: 11 Apr 2007 Posts: 5250 Location: Along the Mississippi, USA
Thanks: 60
Thanked:27
Posted: 10-19-07 13:02pm
I agree with psych nurse- don't let
yourself be romantic with someone because
you feel like you need to take care of
them.
A real relationship is one in which both
partners are caring for each other. While
that is possible with him should his
condition be kept under control- you need
to think about the reasons you would want
to be involved with him.
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mind805
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 27 Oct 2007 Posts: 1
Hello My Name Is Lisa Posted: 10-27-07 20:34pm
anyway i call my ex boyfriend he is
schizophrenia we have broke up 5 times it
wasnt me that what his ideal anyway me and
cory try be back together and he tell me
he love me alot and want to see me and we
talk on the phone for hours good talk
joking thing like that so how can i help
my ex boyfriend his is schizophrenia how
can i do and do u think it will help
realationship for last ??
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Georgia59
Moderator
Joined: 11 Apr 2007 Posts: 5250 Location: Along the Mississippi, USA
Thanks: 60
Thanked:27
Posted: 10-29-07 10:13am
The only thing you can do to help him is
to make sure he is getting the proper
treatment for his illness and support him
emotionally.
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