Ending a Relationship Forum - What Does It Mean When Guys Do This?


What Does It Mean When Guys Do This?

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imsad

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What Does It Mean When Guys Do This? Posted: 10-13-07 07:57am


One thing I loved about the guy I was seeing was that he always did what he said. He always called when he said he would. It is a pet peeve of mine when he doesn't! All of a sudden w/ in the past week he would tell me in the morning that "he'll call me right back" then he doesn't until the next day. (he wasn't even busy he admitted to me) He did this twice in one week. In the same week he called, I called him back, & he didn't call me back til the next day. I didn't answer on purpose though. If I truly liked someone I ALWAYS call back no matter what I am doing. I am a woman of my word. I feel if he wanted to talk to me he would have stuck to his word and called back. Nothing bad happened w/us, we were actually getting closer & connecting more, progressing I guess you would say. If he is playing mind games to make me think he's "not giving in to the relationship" or "doesn't want me to know how much he likes me" then he's going about it all wrong. I don't play games and It is a turn-off when he plays mind games. I am lost interest in him because of that & I'm about to tell him it feels awkward now and he screwed up. Guys or girls..what do you think?

deebaby621

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Posted: 10-14-07 09:42am


honestly, guys and phones just do not mix. i have been with my boyfriend for almost 2 years now & God forbid if he calls more than once a day. it is a true annoyance but i've learned that it's just in his nature. imo, i think it has something to do with the fact that men respond more to visual things.. meaning they'd feel much more comfortable talking in person. the women out there that have guys that call "just to say hey" -- GOD BLESS YOU! i know my man loves me & he shows me that. but when i see the day that he calls me out of the blue just to check in - that will be a day to remember hah. i get tired of doing all the calling. sometimes i don't call at all.. then he calls me later in the evening and wonders why my voice sounds irritated towards him. hmmmm.. i wonder! men are funny. but we love 'em still right. idk exactly what to say about your particular situation.. it seems like he almost has mixed feelings. or if he really is trying to play "hard to get" - he's not doing a very good job of it because it's steering you away. you need to have a talk with him and let him know that when he doesn't do what he says he will - it really lets you down & makes you wonder how he'll act later on in the relationship. let him know that if he doesn't act on his word now - how can you expect him to in the future. hope this helped.

imsad

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to Deebaby621 Posted: 10-14-07 09:49am


Thanks for the info! It's good to hear that it may not mean anything at all since your bf does the same thing. I actually asked him if anything was wrong and he was surprised I thought something was wrong. He actually apologized and said he will make an effort to try and not to do that anymore. (but he did it again last night. LOL ) Now I feel kinda 'guilty' but at least I know nothing is wrong! I think my ex-bf spoiled me because he always kept his word and would just call to say 'hey'. I cannot think of ONE time he said he would call & didn't! He was truly one in a million. ( I was the one who screwed up the relatitionship though. )

s_kalb

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Posted: 10-14-07 10:10am


One guy's point of view if it can help: I'm pretty ponctual on phone calls only when I have nothing to do. But at times, I have those bloody busy moments where I'm idle of any communication for a whole while. Then a few hours later I get a phone call or a text message and before answering I tense myself saying "DAMN I forgot !!", but it's too late at that moment heh. Now go explain to the lady that you were busy and that work isn't more important than her... It's called monoprocessing. When concentrated, I can't think of anything else than the onfocused subject. But that was out of my gf's comprehension limits. For the long run, I will from now and forever say upfront: I DO NOT ANWSER QUICKLY. In fact, you'll get quicker results coming over my house by foot and talk to me directly than to use the cell phone. Sometimes I see this device as a poisoned gift. Looks angrily at the battered old Nokia Last edited by s_kalb on 10-14-07 10:12am; edited 1 time in total

young Girl

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Posted: 10-14-07 10:11am


lol boys are scared of phones

Mikolas

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Posted: 10-14-07 10:32am


Haha guilty -_-. I'm not a phone person, I used to view it as a luxury and still do sometimes despite my blue tooth and chocolate phone. Hate it by the way, don't get it! But yea, some of my lady friends get mad cuz I never call them, but I'm like pssh, you wanna talk to me, then you call me woman! It's not like they call me either sheesh. This is from a friendship perspective though, so I don't think it applies too much. I don't know what to say over the phone though, if one of them is sad and tells me about issues, I just can't say what I want to say properly. I just tell them, tell you what, let me know where you are going to be and if you want I will come over and give you a bear hug and we can talk about it then. I can't do phones -_-. But I'll remember this is an issue you ladies don't like for future references =). I'm punctual though, I hate breaking promises and time when it involves other people waiting for me. I don't think you should worry about anything just yet, I understand how small things can mean a lot to a girl, or anybody. Especially about how you feel that if he cares, he would stick to his word and call, I feel that way about friendships. But guys tend to suck at knowing how to make a woman happy in the little things, and he may not have viewed that as vital to your needs, or he forgot, or a bunch of other possibilities. I'm sure things could be a lot worse then that. GL! and don't be sad, get glad!

lonestarguy

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Posted: 10-14-07 10:33am


Not scared of phones. Just like Mr. Kalb said, sometimes we get tunnel-vision working on something we are concentrating on. I'm very loving and always on time and call my wife at least once a day, but still I could be occupied with something and put off calling until later. We usually focus on one thing at a time. Women are the multi-tasking ones.

Pocahontas101

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No excuse Posted: 03-10-08 14:59pm


If he could return your call when he say he is in the begining then he could do it any other time. He chooses not to. I would understand maybe not returning your call for a couple of hour but for a whole day theres no excuse. Talk to him and tell him how you feel about the issue and if he doesnt chance then you do the same thing he does call him when you feel like it or dont call at all and see how he feels about that. If he still doesnt chance its time for you to move on. Good luck. XOXO

Truth_serum

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real talk Posted: 03-10-08 15:37pm


Consistency is the best policy, but lets face it men don't have a consistent bone in their bodies. They will lie, cheat,and steal as long as you allow the behavior to transpire. Each man has bs and you choose how much you want to deal with.

Neek

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truth serum Posted: 03-14-08 11:38am


i appreciate your honesty.. i am in a i hate men mood..and seriously you make me see the light! ITS TRUE they all come with BS, just depends how much you're going to deal with.

Amethyst_Butterfly

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Posted: 04-15-08 00:31am


hmmm...almost the same thing happened to me, but its because he was avoiding me because we just found out a few weeks ago that I'm pregnant. So....yeah

Biani

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Posted: 05-20-08 13:24pm


I don't buy that whole bit about 'multi-tasking' not being their thing. Either they care enough to call when they say they will, or they don't. Guys DO have a brain, even though sometimes they like to pretend they don't, or act like they don't. It MAY happen that they truly are very busy, but if they are not that busy, it just means it wasn't important to them, or they are not calling on purpose, god forbid you think they like you. I've seen it happen lots of times... when a guy is really into a girl, he drops everything and calls. Even if he's so very busy at work or whatever, he at least sneaks 2 minutes in to call. When a guy doesn't think it's important to call or doesn't really care about letting the girl wait for his call and letting them down, they don't. At other times, they think they will seem too desperate or to eager to please, or that the girl will take advantage thinking they 'have' them or something, and start acting like keeping their word is simply not a priority, hence, you're not a priority, so get off you high horse! Which is totally stupid, but i've seen men do this.

alien

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Posted: 07-12-08 10:43am


it's just a couple of phonecalls. I think u're over analysing it... try to be a bit understanding and don't be so needy, it'll make u seem like a much more secure lover.