mzLiLi
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Sep 2007
Posts: 60
Location: ,
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Posted: 11-05-07 09:49am
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Like I've said before I have a steady job
and and stable support system. also my
mother and my aunt did it. and was in
college which is still my plan. I have
everything planned out. I could do it and
I'm going to the doctor tomorrow to see if
I will be doing it. wish me luck
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rosejackson
Supporter
Joined: 23 Dec 2005
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Location: hertfordshire, england
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Posted: 11-05-07 11:09am
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me and my other half aren't married and we
work for a living so thats how we pay for
everything. i think you need to be in a
stable relationship with good income
coming in before thinking about having a
baby. it doesn't necessarily mean you have
to be married
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Verizon-y
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Aug 2007
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Posted: 11-05-07 13:44pm
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rose, but why not get married?
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rosejackson
Supporter
Joined: 23 Dec 2005
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Location: hertfordshire, england
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Posted: 11-05-07 13:46pm
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i am engaged to get married, but we think
of waiting until next year or the year
after to get married. i just dont think
that you have to be married to have a baby
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Verizon-y
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Aug 2007
Posts: 3291
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Posted: 11-05-07 13:49pm
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| mzLiLi
wrote: | | Like I've said before I have
a steady job and and stable support
system. also my mother and my aunt did it.
and was in college which is still my plan.
I have everything planned out. I could do
it and I'm going to the doctor tomorrow to
see if I will be doing it. wish me
luck |
You didn't answer my question:
| futureshock
wrote: | | How are you going to pay for
everything with a newborn at
home? |
Who is the father? Does the guy even know
you are trying to get pregnant? Do your
mother and aunt know?
I noticed you didn't mention:
A bf for yourself;
a husband for your mother;
or
a husband for your aunt.
Is anyone married or in a stable
relationship in your family? Or do you
all live off of the government? Are you
planning to live off of welfare after your
baby is born?
Do you know where the money comes from
that the government gives poor single
parents? It comes from hard working
people who are trying to save up enough
money to get married and have children,
and from married people with children just
trying to get by.
Why should they give you, or any other
single parents who got pregnant on
purpose, their money?
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Dannzibelle
Supporter
Joined: 23 Oct 2006
Posts: 3811
Location: South East, England
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Posted: 11-05-07 14:45pm
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Right futureshock i've held my tounge for
a while now but you're really starting to
get to me now. Marriage is not everything
you can have a perfectly happy and healthy
family without walking down the aisle, why
don't you understand that?
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Verizon-y
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Aug 2007
Posts: 3291
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Posted: 11-05-07 15:16pm
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Because the only reason why someone
wouldn't get married is to get welfare,
and I don't feel like paying for other
people.
I am referring to people who get pregnant on
purpose only.
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rosejackson
Supporter
Joined: 23 Dec 2005
Posts: 4388
Location: hertfordshire, england
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Posted: 11-05-07 15:18pm
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| futureshock
wrote: | Because the only reason why
someone wouldn't get married is to get
welfare, and I don't feel like paying for
other people.
I am referring to people who get pregnant on
purpose
only. |
i guess there are people who get pregnant
just for a place of their own and
benefits, but i've never met anyone like
that, especially in this forum
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mzLiLi
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Sep 2007
Posts: 60
Location: ,
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Posted: 11-05-07 15:36pm
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| futureshock
wrote: | | mzLiLi
wrote: | | Like I've said before I have
a steady job and and stable support
system. also my mother and my aunt did it.
and was in college which is still my plan.
I have everything planned out. I could do
it and I'm going to the doctor tomorrow to
see if I will be doing it. wish me
luck |
You didn't answer my question:
| futureshock
wrote: | | How are you going to pay for
everything with a newborn at
home? |
Who is the father? Does the guy even know
you are trying to get pregnant? Do your
mother and aunt know?
I noticed you didn't mention:
A bf for yourself;
a husband for your mother;
or
a husband for your aunt.
Is anyone married or in a stable
relationship in your family? Or do you
all live off of the government? Are you
planning to live off of welfare after your
baby is born?
Do you know where the money comes from
that the government gives poor single
parents? It comes from hard working
people who are trying to save up enough
money to get married and have children,
and from married people with children just
trying to get by.
Why should they give you, or any other
single parents who got pregnant on
purpose, their
money? |
as far as my family goes my mother
divorced my father and we we're never on
welfare, thats a system that is not made
for you to get off so before you go
talking junk reseach it. my aunt is
married and has 5 kids. and my other aunt
is married with 3. I am back with my
boyfriend that i've been with since my
freshman year of high school and im now a
senior. The guy that i am maybe pregnant
by knows that i maybe i told him when i
first started thinking so. He knows that
i've been wanting to get pregnant since my
last 2 i lost. And he didn't seem to mind.
By the way just incase your trying to
figure it out my boyfriend is not the guy
i maybe pregnant by. But my boyfriend, his
family, my maybe baby's father and his
family, my family, and my best friend are
more than happy to help me, just like i
was his child.
and i did answer your question i will pay
for everything with my steady job and with
the help of my stable support. You know
that makes up alot of people don't you.
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Verizon-y
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Aug 2007
Posts: 3291
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Posted: 11-05-07 15:42pm
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How do you support yourself while you are
at home with a baby?
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mzLiLi
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Sep 2007
Posts: 60
Location: ,
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Posted: 11-05-07 15:53pm
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well i will be moving to North Carolina
once i graduate. I will be living with my
boyfriend and my best friend. My
boyfriend's mother already told me that if
i am pregnant and her son is going take
care of it like it's his that i'm not to
leave the baby at no babysitters. so there
goes that. And the college that i have
already got accepted into has a program
for women that had children young(weekend
and night school). Since i am going to
school to be a counselor or a nurse
haven't decided. It doesn't take that much
schooling but pays well. When i go to
school by boyfriend will be at home from
work he works at a group home and if he's
not my bestfriend said she has that under
control. and by time my child will beable
to speak a full sentence i will be almost
done with school and everything will be
fine.
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Verizon-y
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Aug 2007
Posts: 3291
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Posted: 11-05-07 15:56pm
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Why would your best friend, and a guy who
isn't even the father, and HIS mother, all
want to sacrifice SO MUCH when your
decision to have a baby has nothing to do
with them?
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mzLiLi
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Sep 2007
Posts: 60
Location: ,
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Posted: 11-05-07 15:59pm
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actually me and my boyfriend had been
trying to get pregnant both of those time
before that i had gotten pregnant were by
him. And he loves me unconditionally. And
if i have a child it has everything to do
with him, since he loves me and to love me
he has to love all of me even if that
means a child. And his mother know that
one day me and him are going to get
married why be petty and hate me. And as
far as my bestfriend goes i've done so
much for her she doesn't even care.
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Verizon-y
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Aug 2007
Posts: 3291
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Posted: 11-05-07 16:05pm
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I don't hate you at all. You sound like a
very sweet person, and I am sorry if I
gave you that impression.
To me, it seems like you are on a tall
building getting ready to jump, and I am
trying to stop you.
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Maddie34
Supporter
Joined: 06 Oct 2007
Posts: 1897
Location: ,
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Posted: 11-05-07 16:09pm
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I'm just curious but why, if you were
planning on attending college, would you
try to get pregnant?
I know a lot of teen moms from my high
school but they never intended on college.
They just work in mines or their partner
works in mines while they work somewhere
dumb. They are almost set for life becuase
they never intend to leave. But thats not
what it sounds like you're planning so its
not registering for me.
College is hard enough. A baby is hard
enough. Why would you PLAN to put two
extremely hard situations in one?
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young Girl
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jun 2007
Posts: 13932
Location: everythings better in, texas USA
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Posted: 11-05-07 16:12pm
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futureshock i really dont think you see
that mariiage does NOT mean anything when
it comes to raising a child
at all
good parenst are good parents reguardless
of if they are married or not
why does this matter to you so much?
because it REALLy bugs me and lots of
people on here when you insist on pesting
about marriage all the time
you may think marroiage is high and mighty
and a huge deal but we dont so can you
please stop bringing it up?
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Verizon-y
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Aug 2007
Posts: 3291
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Posted: 11-05-07 16:17pm
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First of all, don't read my posts if they
bother you, and I am sorry that they do.
If someone could give me a reasonable
answer as to why they don't want to get
married, I'd appreciate it.
Marriage does matter. A boyfriend can
pick up and take off anytime. Marriage is
harder to walk away from, and harder to
leave a wife and child penniless. If two
people are making a lifelong commitment to
have a child together, why not het
married, too? It seems suspicious to me.
The only reason I've heard not to get
married is so a person can qualify for
welfare.
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rosejackson
Supporter
Joined: 23 Dec 2005
Posts: 4388
Location: hertfordshire, england
Thanks: 9
Thanked:14
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Posted: 11-05-07 16:22pm
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maybe people dont want to get married is
to concentrate on the baby at that time.
marriage does not matter. i know friends
who have been together over 21 years and
not got married. not everyone wants to not
get married so they can qualify for
welfare
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Katrinadoodle
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Nov 2007
Posts: 1231
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Posted: 11-05-07 16:27pm
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| futureshock
wrote: | First of all, don't read my
posts if they bother you, and I am sorry
that they do.
If someone could give me a reasonable
answer as to why they don't want to get
married, I'd appreciate it.
Marriage does matter. A boyfriend can
pick up and take off anytime. Marriage is
harder to walk away from, and harder to
leave a wife and child penniless. If two
people are making a lifelong commitment to
have a child together, why not het
married, too? It seems suspicious to me.
The only reason I've heard not to get
married is so a person can qualify for
welfare. |
I'm not getting married until I'm older,
and I don't think you should be pushing
for teen moms to marry the dads. That's
just going to bump the divorce rate up
even further. 59% of marriages of women
under 18 end in divorce within 15 years.
Why would you wish that on her?
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rosejackson
Supporter
Joined: 23 Dec 2005
Posts: 4388
Location: hertfordshire, england
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Posted: 11-05-07 16:30pm
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| Katrinadoodle
wrote: | | futureshock
wrote: | First of all, don't read my
posts if they bother you, and I am sorry
that they do.
If someone could give me a reasonable
answer as to why they don't want to get
married, I'd appreciate it.
Marriage does matter. A boyfriend can
pick up and take off anytime. Marriage is
harder to walk away from, and harder to
leave a wife and child penniless. If two
people are making a lifelong commitment to
have a child together, why not het
married, too? It seems suspicious to me.
The only reason I've heard not to get
married is so a person can qualify for
welfare. |
I'm not getting married until I'm older,
and I don't think you should be pushing
for teen moms to marry the dads. That's
just going to bump the divorce rate up
even further. 59% of marriages of women
under 18 end in divorce within 15 years.
Why would you wish that on
her? |
i agree, you should only marry a person if
you're sure what you want. you should
never rush into a decision, even if you do
have a baby together. it does not mean it
would last forever. my boyfriends mother
has married each of her children's parents
because she thought it was right. all
ended in divorce
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