recovering from anorexia and bulimia

HEY!!
Welcome back, remember me? I haven't posted on here in awhile either but I sometimes login just to read other posts.
I understand what you mean about feeling fat and wanting to have your ED to make you stand out as well as improve other things in your life. But ask yourself can anyone but you tell that your body is somehow different than it was when yuo were less worried about being good at your job and getting attention from your boyfriend.

Recovery has been such a rollercoaster for me. Almost all summer i was doing so well and feeling in control and then last week I purged everyday. The good news is that I didn't purge today! Yesterday i started writing a journal to my therapist. For some reason it really helps me stay on track with my eating.

Talk to you soon

[quote="inezrina"]HEY!!
Welcome back, remember me? I haven't posted on here in awhile either but I sometimes login just to read other posts.
I understand what you mean about feeling fat and wanting to have your ED to make you stand out as well as improve other things in your life. But ask yourself can anyone but you tell that your body is somehow different than it was when yuo were less worried about being good at your job and getting attention from your boyfriend.

Recovery has been such a rollercoaster for me. Almost all summer i was doing so well and feeling in control and then last week I purged everyday. The good news is that I didn't purge today! Yesterday i started writing a journal to my therapist. For some reason it really helps me stay on track with my eating.

OMG Hey girl!!!Of course I remember you!Thats so crazy that you looked at my post.the main reason i got on here was to get some advice about pregnancy.I havent had my period in two months but my blood work said it was negative.Well anyways,it made me miss you guys!!!!They def werent as nice as the poeple on here!lol.I know this recoverey is hell.I mean I "look well" but dont always feel it.I try to stop eating,but then I get so hungry that I can stop,but not like a binge or anything.I just need food and I hate it.Im so scared to purge bc Im scared I wont be able to stop it.I hated being known as bulimic,and always wanted to be anorexic.I know ,I know that sounds so sick but Im sure you know where Im coming from on that.And please hang in there,you always have been so strong!!!And Im so proud of you that you havent purged today!!!!!!!And thats wonderful that writing to your therapist helps.For some reason it has never helped me but I thouht i would give it a try by making a new account.btw,you have a sn?

have you taken another preganacy test? do you want to be pregnant? The first time I realized how much I want to have kids was when I fell in love the first time. The whole idea of having kids with someone I loved was amazing.

hey nice ppl,

i am ex Mia/Ana and now suffer from bingeing and insomnia.

u seem to be good old friends. great that ppl r so kind here on the forum. i wrote in my ed girl diary, how does it come that so intelligent and loving ppl get ed? and this question comes to my mind again while reading ur posts.

i think it is impossible to be very very skinny without being on a strikt diet. and a very strikt diet without a huge motivation gets u back to ed. so it is a HUUUGE challange, i think

cheers

Hi!
It is interesting that you brought up the type of people who get eating disorders. I have been thinking about that quite a bit in the last couple years. I was dating a guy who i had not yet told I was bulimic and he starting telling me how he once had a bulimic girlfriend. I thought that was so interesting. He was attracted to women who were driven and intelligent and at an increased risk for eating disorders.

Well I want to eventually get pregnant but not at this moment.So I have been purgin/dieting for the past week now.I cant believe I am relapsing!!!!!!!!!!!I need to stop now,but it is taking over me again!!!!!!!!!!Help me girls!!!!!!!!I pretty much cheating on my boyfriend of 2 years and he forgave me but I think this is my way of punishing myself for it.I dont know why all of a sudden I want to starve myself again.I just did it tonight and I feel horrible.And your right about most of the girls who have this problem are such good people.Its like they treat everyone else so much better then they treat themselves.Liek I guss we dont think we deserve to be treated like we treat others.I feel so alone right now.Should I try and wait it out and see if I get better,or treat this problem right away?I cant afford to get help again.And I want to gete skinny so bad.I just have been feeling so fat and gross when I eat now.Its been two years since I have purged,why now do I feel like I need to do it?Advice please!!!!!<3

Hi, Sammy!
Look, you mustn't see yourself like that - you're not an object and your value is inside, not outside. Besides, you have nothing to worry about, because you're very nice and kind and beautiful!

Sam-
How are you doing? You can be ok, I believe in you.

Thank you guys for your support.I am slipping back into my old ways but for some odd reason it doesnt even bother me.I mean I hate when my bf gts upset when he find out that I have purged or what not,but other then that,Im pretty content.People are gettng concerned and I hate it.I wish everybody wuld just mind their own business and let me live my life the way I want to live it.Ugh.