..how Should I React to This? Posted: 11-05-07 21:51pm
I've been cutting for a while, I stopped
and then recently started it up again and
the whole time I've had one friend who's
been my ray of sunshine.. he was always
the only person who could make me smile
when I felt like caca, the person who made
it worth it to stop and I loved him so
much so I trusted him and asked him to
help because I knew he could. Today he
sent me an email which said --
"I find this whole cutting business is
extremely unsettling and I wish that you
never speak of it to me again. It freaks
me out and is not something I can talk
about."
How do you react to something like that?
I feel like I can't even call him a friend
anymore, because what friend would ever
say something like that to another?
It makes me queasy.
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Winged_shadow_girl
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 14 Oct 2007 Posts: 6 Location: ,
Posted: 11-05-07 21:58pm
I know it's really hard to talk to people
sometimes, but explain to him that it's
something you really want help with and
that you should be able to talk to him
about it. Pretty much tell him what you
told us, and most importantly, be honest.
I'm sorry to say it, but if he can't
handle the truth and still accept you for
who you are, then I think you need to find
a better friend.
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azurete
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Oct 2007 Posts: 6
Posted: 11-05-07 22:10pm
I think I need to find a better friend
too. I don't get it -- he was the one who
got me to stop last time. I understand it
being hard to deal with, but saying
something like that isn't something I can
fathom.
I hate that its making me feel all cold
and empty inside again. When I'm cold and
empty I do the things that I shouldn't..
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Winged_shadow_girl
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 14 Oct 2007 Posts: 6 Location: ,
Posted: 11-05-07 22:15pm
I'm really sorry that happened to you. I
was like that. I had a friend that I
could talk to about it and she actually
made me stop for a while, but then she
told me it was all an act and I was only
doing it to get attention. If I was doing
it for attention, I would cut my wrists
and openly display it. But that's not how
it's done.
Anyways, *hugs* stay strong and try to
find another friend/outlet other than him.
Might I suggest music? That's what got
me to stop for a while...I found a band
that I'm really into and they changed my
life forever. I don't know your exact
taste, but if your interested, PM me and I
can recommend a few bands you might be
interested in.
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azurete
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Oct 2007 Posts: 6
Posted: 11-08-07 00:02am
update: I talked to him about it, and part
of me had hoped that maybe we could fix
it, but he just doesnt understand why what
he said was wrong and why I found it so
upsetting, and now I feel he's not someone
I can really count on as a friend anymore,
which makes me sad, but I think its for
the best.
I really loved him... sigh.
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mzLiLi
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Sep 2007 Posts: 60 Location: ,
Posted: 11-12-07 10:21am
i had a friend do that to me because he
didn't get that if he was enough to make
me stop before why wasn't he enough to
keep me that way. If you really want him
to understand let him know that cutting in
its own is an addiction. Just as addictive
as a drug. and maybe he'll understand
that. and that, thats the way that you
know to deal with things when they get to
be to much and thats the only way you know
and the first thing your going to turn to
when it gets rough. And maybe he'll be
interested in helping you get help or
helping you to find a different way to
deal with it. By the way i heard that a
rubber band helps
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azurete
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Oct 2007 Posts: 6
Posted: 11-13-07 00:28am
Final (?) Update: I talked to him today
about it, we've been doing this long dance
of avoiding each other, avoiding the
topic, pretending everything was okay when
we knew it wasn't and that our friendship
was in jeopardy, but I'd gone shopping
over the weekend and bought him a nice
sweater because I just felt compelled to,
and I dont know if that compelled him to
respond to the last email I sent him, but
I think we came to some sort of
understanding and I can understand where
he's coming from, though I wish he'd gone
about that better. He mentioned how every
time he thought about it his wrists
started to feel weird.
I've noticed that lately people have
started to treat me as if I was made of
porcelain and could break at any moment,
and I was wondering if there was anyone
here who'd gone through that? I dont know
what to say to them, or if theres anything
I could say that'd convince them that they
dont have to be scared of being a
trigger.
Oh, and its been two weeks, thats 7 times
what I've been able to do before, I'm
happy =)
Been thinking about going to talk to the
school's social worker about possible
depression
