Joined: 21 Nov 2007 Posts: 49 Location: Southern, United States
Young Love, Kinda Nervous Posted: 11-21-07 04:02am
I'm 19 and I've been seeing a girl for
just a little over a year. I am madly in
love with her, we both have talked about
how we sure we're not kidding ourselves or
caught up the fruits of young passion and
all that jazz, we are both believers in
abstinence as well so sex plays no role in
this, we can get right at each others
throats at times but who doesnt. My
question is, since we are so young and
have a veeeerry long way to go before we
can tie the knot or anything like that, Im
afraid we'll lose the love or get bored.
We've talked and theres no way we are even
close to marriage, that will have to wait
til were both out of college. Im just
kinda nervous because Ive never felt this
way about someone. Im 99% sure shes the
one. Is there anything I should b weary of
?
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rooted
Supporter
Joined: 22 Mar 2007 Posts: 392
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Posted: 11-21-07 15:00pm
Well, sexual compatibility is pretty
important to me and for creating a healthy
couple. Why is abstinence important to
you?
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samba88
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Nov 2007 Posts: 49 Location: Southern, United States
Posted: 11-21-07 15:35pm
Abstinence is important to me because i
know that decent strong relationships are
few and far these days and finding someone
youre not going to divorce in two years is
almost impossible this day in age, being
my age, i know that sex can really tack on
misguided feelings and such, we are not
totally unsexual, we actually have a very
healthy sexual relationship, sex excluded.
I dont believe in total abstinence just
until marriage for moral and religious
purposes and just plain bc i wanna make
sure that shes the right one.
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Maddie34
Supporter
Joined: 06 Oct 2007 Posts: 1167 Location: ,
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online
Posted: 11-22-07 00:42am
Nothing wrong with not having sex before
marriage-- it does have the possibility of
complicating things for some people. I
know what rooted meant, but you seem to
have that covered.
And my dear, you will have fights and your
relationship will be tested by arguments
and how you react to situations--they will
either weaken the relationship or make it
stronger-- either way you will learn what
you need to about your partner so you can
make the right decision when marriage does
come up. Just keep going the way you are
going, if you DO get bored and lose the
love then she's not the one.
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To0kxy
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 07 Nov 2007 Posts: 24 Location: ,
Posted: 12-04-07 18:01pm
Why don't you get engaged. You can be
engaged for aslong as you both like and
the extra commitment might stop the
worrying.
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Rosie H
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Jun 2007 Posts: 1082 Location: Phoenix, AZ, USA
Thanks: 13
Thanked:4
Posted: 12-04-07 18:38pm
I think you should just take it all in
stride. Do not rush into anything yet.
You are still young like me and there
should be no hurry to decide on anything,
whether its to have sex and get married or
not have sex and not get married. I just
turned 21 and my boyfriend just turned 20.
We have been together since we were 18
and we have decided to wait until I am
done with college to get married and talk
about children. We are living together
already and in a lot of ways married. Life
is good for us. I would not want to
change what we have now. I know that I am
not ready for marriage and children. To
me marriage is complete commitment to
someone and that involves kids. When he
asks me to marry him I want to say yes and
mean it, I dont want to be enagaged for
the heck of it. So yeah theres my story.
Just dont feel pressured by other people.
Oviously things are working for you right
now, there is no reason to change it.
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Maddie34
Supporter
Joined: 06 Oct 2007 Posts: 1167 Location: ,
Thanks: 43
Thanked:12
online
Posted: 12-04-07 20:01pm
Rosie, I agree completely.
Getting engaged would not solve any issues
these two might go through, if anything it
might put more preasure on the
relationship.
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