Joined: 01 Dec 2007 Posts: 8 Location: , England, UK
Not Myself after breakup Posted: 12-02-07 15:07pm
I'm going to apologize now for this being
long!... I'd appreciate any replies
I have been single now for just over two
months, after a three year relationship.
I'm 19 now, and my ex is the only person
I've ever 'been with'. The break up wasnt
my idea and I took it really bad but now
I'm used to being single I am enjoying the
space. I just want to look after myself
for a bit and enjoy the freedom.
But I'm embarrassed to say I'm a bit stuck
when it comes to 'what next?' For now I'm
okay on my own, I've sorted myself out
with my own place. But the main reason I'm
finding this easy-ish is because I'm so
self-conscious of my body, and scared of
doing anything with anyone else after
being with the same guy for so long, that
I know I wont take that step anytime soon.
Without meaning to sound big-headed (as i
honestly dont rate myself much at all)
when I go out I do get a lot of male
attention which makes me feel good, but I
dont know how to deal with it. I'm not
really up for one-night stands... but I'm
definitely not ready for a relationship
yet. I get on better with guys than I do
girls and have a lot of male friends, but
I seem to get stuck in tricky situations
where when I explain to guys how I feel at
the moment, I couple have said that they'd
be willing to wait till I'm ready for more
(relationship wise) which totally freaks
me out as this is not what I want. I'm
quite social and enjoy meeting new people
but some guys that I know/meet seem to be
pretty keen already which pushes me away.
I dont want people getting jealous of me
meeting up with other people if I want to.
I just want space and I want to enjoy it.
But I dont want to get so used to it that
I get beyond scared of taking that next
step...
I'm sorry if this hasnt made any sense at
all. I'm not even sure what I'm expecting
out of it, I'm just feeling pretty down
(which is unusual as I really have been
feeling happier recently) so needed to get
my feelings out... x
Well if you do not want a relationship or
one night stands, maybe date around? Go
out with no expectations but with enough
self esteem not to let yourself get taken
advantage of. Go and try to have fun with
whatever you do. Maybe pick up a new
hobby, hang out with friends, and maybe
volunteer somewhere... there's no joy like
putting a smile on someone else's face.
Just try to go and do what makes you
happy. Because life's too short to not
enjoy the time you have here
