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young Girl

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Just to Let You Know
Posted: 12-02-07 23:09pm

for all the teenagers out there currently tryi9ng to get pregnant, or haveing unprotected sex without thinking of the consequences first:

i had my daughter on the 28th of november. shes just a few days old. you really dont know what its like
to have to wake up
and not sleep hardly.
you dont know
what its like to have someone else relying on YOU to feed them,change them,take care of them. make them feel safe
you really DONT KNOW how it is
to have your baby crying and crying
and not be able to figure out whats wrong. why they are upset.
you DONT KNOW what its like to feel so frusterated, and want to cry, but you cant because if YOU CRY...they cry even harder.

i love my daughter more than anything. but i just wanted to let you all know justb how hard it is. these are the first few days and its tough. being a mom is the most exausting,tiring job in the whole wide world.

please please be careful you girls (and guys)
if you DONT want a baby then get on some sort of birth control, even 2 forms of birth control. just to be safe.
and if your a 14,15,16,17 yr old however old you are teenager wanting a baby please listen to some of the ladies on here giving advice. they know what they are talking about. babies arent throw away when your tired of them playtoys. its not like playing house or like "babysitting"
this is something that will stick with YOU for the rest of your life
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rosejackson

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Posted: 12-03-07 04:09am

thats completely true. you dont know what it's truely like until you have a baby yourself. you get absolutely no sleep . your baby takes over your life.
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sweet_mom

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Posted: 12-03-07 12:05pm

I completely agree with EVERYTHING you said.You'll never know the frustration that a child can bring until you have one of your own.I was 17 when I had my son,he was an awesome newborn baby,hardly ever cried,hardly ever got gas,slept a lot.But the times he did cry he would cry for half an hour without stopping,he would have me in tears before he would stop.He has always been a sensitive child though and if he hurts me by headbutting or whatever and I pretend to cry to show him it hurts he will stop,look at me and then give me a hug and a kiss.Whenever I am frustrated with him crying and I start to cry he will stop and give me a hug.

There have been days when I just want to sleep in,I don't want to get up at 7 in the morning all the time but as soon as he wakes up I have to get up.There are days when I really just don't want to change a diaper,but I know I have to because if I don't my son could get a rash and then he would be in pain.Which is something I really don't want.
I hate the stares I get from people on the bus,that think I am too young to be a mother.I hate how some people feel it is there duty to give you advice that is totally uncalled for.
I rode a bus in another city one day and they have a rule where the child has to be out of the stroller.So my son was sitting on a normal seat and he decided he wanted to stand up,I told him a few times to sit down,finally I said in a really stern voice to sit down and a woman across the way from me gave me a dirty look and said 'that's not how you speak to children'.I nearly snapped on her,I know how to talk to my son,I know how he listens.
The point of all that was to tell you that if you are not ready for people to look down on you for being a young mom,then don't have a child.If you are not ready to have somebody depend on you for everything then don't have a child.If you are not ready to give up some of your friends and are not ready to give up going out to the movies whenever you want,then don't have a child.
A child forces you to grow up fast.A child is the greatest gift in the world when you are willing to sacrifice for it.I have made many sacrifices for my son,and I don't regret any of them.
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young Girl

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Posted: 12-03-07 13:02pm

sweet_mom wrote:
I completely agree with EVERYTHING you said.You'll never know the frustration that a child can bring until you have one of your own.I was 17 when I had my son,he was an awesome newborn baby,hardly ever cried,hardly ever got gas,slept a lot.But the times he did cry he would cry for half an hour without stopping,he would have me in tears before he would stop.He has always been a sensitive child though and if he hurts me by headbutting or whatever and I pretend to cry to show him it hurts he will stop,look at me and then give me a hug and a kiss.Whenever I am frustrated with him crying and I start to cry he will stop and give me a hug.

There have been days when I just want to sleep in,I don't want to get up at 7 in the morning all the time but as soon as he wakes up I have to get up.There are days when I really just don't want to change a diaper,but I know I have to because if I don't my son could get a rash and then he would be in pain.Which is something I really don't want.
I hate the stares I get from people on the bus,that think I am too young to be a mother.I hate how some people feel it is there duty to give you advice that is totally uncalled for.
I rode a bus in another city one day and they have a rule where the child has to be out of the stroller.So my son was sitting on a normal seat and he decided he wanted to stand up,I told him a few times to sit down,finally I said in a really stern voice to sit down and a woman across the way from me gave me a dirty look and said 'that's not how you speak to children'.I nearly snapped on her,I know how to talk to my son,I know how he listens.
The point of all that was to tell you that if you are not ready for people to look down on you for being a young mom,then don't have a child.If you are not ready to have somebody depend on you for everything then don't have a child.If you are not ready to give up some of your friends and are not ready to give up going out to the movies whenever you want,then don't have a child.
A child forces you to grow up fast.A child is the greatest gift in the world when you are willing to sacrifice for it.I have made many sacrifices for my son,and I don't regret any of them.


thank you so much for your story! you are an amazeing mother. dont let the stares and hurtful words from people bring you down! i know exactly what you mean about the stareing and the looks.
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jessamyn

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Posted: 12-03-07 14:09pm

OMG momma I was jussssssttt going to make a post about you and if you had her or not I completely missed that I LOVE YOU! how areyou feeling?
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Verizon-y

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Posted: 12-03-07 14:32pm

*bump*
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young Girl

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Posted: 12-03-07 14:48pm

jessamyn wrote:
OMG momma I was jussssssttt going to make a post about you and if you had her or not I completely missed that I LOVE YOU! how areyou feeling?


im doing great actually
shes a really good baby
she hardly ever cries except when shes hungry. its been an overwhelming pat few days
between all of the company, paperwork, trying to make phone calls, talk to everyone, and get rest is hard lol
but i thik we are doing great so far Smile
its hard work!
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Verizon-y

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Posted: 12-03-07 22:28pm

How is the baby's dad doing? How much time is he in charge of her?
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young Girl

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Posted: 12-04-07 00:07am

oh gosh hes up with her most of the night
he loves to hold her
he even watched the football game tonight and held her the whole time Smile
its adorable how proud he is
how he talks to her
its not the same travis i knew 6 months ago
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prettygirlygirl

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Joined: 28 Mar 2006
Posts: 213

Posted: 12-04-07 02:42am

The_girlfriend, thank you so much for posting what you did. I'm so glad that you and your boyfriend are enjoying parenthood, but it's so important for other teens to know that it's not all about the good stuff. I think you and Sweet_mom illustrated parenthood quite well. I made a post in another thread about my experience with parenthood, but I'm going to copy it here since I think it fits (it was in response to a teen TTC)

think sometimes it's hard for someone who's not a parent to really see what parenting is all about. Especially as a teenager. It's not all about missing dances and parties, friends, hanging out, college or whatever (you'll probably be too tired to even care), but realizing that parenting isn't as exactly as romantic and wonderful as you thought it would be.

I love my daughter, I would not give her up for the world, and she's certainly the most fantastic thing in my entire life. However, I remember pregnancy (which sucked) birth (which was so horiffically awful I have actually blocked out big chuncks of if), and the fun of early baby hood.

I remember not being able to sleep for more than 2 hours at a time, I remember breast feeding until I thought my nipples were going to fall off, were covered in scabs, and bleeding through every feed. I remember pumping bottles that looked like they were more blood than milk. I remember sitting up wtih inconsolable (even though she was warm, fed, dry, clean, and should have been perfectly happy!) baby at 3 am night after night while I cried harder than she did and there was no one to come and help me (even though I lived in my parents house). I remember toddler temper tantrums in public. I know that a pissed off toddler is a force to be reckoned wtih. I know that my three year old gets pissed off over things such as a food item that has not been wrapped/unwrapped properly, one loop is bigger than the other on her shoe laces, the sky is blue, grass is green, momma won't let her have candy for lunch and sometimes for absolutely no reason at all. The rage a toddler experiences for absolutely no reason is really unbelievable.


Quote: < /tr>
can not wait to have a child someone i can love and cherish somone i can spend time with someone i can share sad and happiness with.


This quote really struck me. I had the same feelings about having children when I found out I was pregnant. I said above that I love my daughter more than anything, but the last three years has been pretty thankless. Remember, they're not even verbal for the first few years. Your child is not going to be someone that will go through everything with you. You're going to have tough times, and you're going to have to do everything in your power to sheild your little one from it all and do your best to give them a real childhood. The relationship you're thinking of is one you have with an adult, not a child.
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