Joined: 21 Jun 2007 Posts: 13936 Location: everythings better in, texas USA
a Dog Named Sex! Posted: 01-07-08 02:47am
HAHAHAHA
Everybody I know who has a dog usually
calls him "Rover" or "Spot".
I
> call mine Sex. Now, Sex has been very
embarrassing to me. When I
went
> to the City Hall to renew the dog's
license, I told the clerk that
I
> would like a license for Sex. He
said, "I would like to have one
> too!" Then I said, "But she is a
dog!" He said he didn't care what
> she looked like. I said, "You don't
understand. ... I have had Sex
> since I was nine years old." He
replied, "You must have been quite
a
> strong boy." When I decided to get
married, I told the minister
that
> I would like to have Sex at the
wedding. He told me to wait until
> after the wedding was over. I said,
"But Sex has played a big part
in
> my life and my whole world revolves
around Sex." He said he didn't
> want to hear about my personal life
and would not marry us in his
> church. I told him everyone would
enjoy having Sex at the wedding.
> The next day we were married at the
Justice of the Peace. My family
> is barred from the church from then
on.
>
> When my wife and I went on our
honeymoon, I took the dog with me.
> When we checked into the motel, I
told the clerk that I wanted a
room
> for me and my wife and a special room
for Sex. He said that every
> room in the motel is a place for sex.
I said, "You don't
> understand. ... Sex keeps me awake at
night." The clerk said, "Me
> too!"
>
> One day I entered Sex in a contest.
But before the competition
began,
> the dog ran away. Another contestant
asked me why I was just
looking
> around. I told him that I was going
to have Sex in the contest. He
> said that I should have sold my own
tickets. "You don't
understand,"
> I said, "I hoped to have Sex on TV."
He called me a show off.
>
> When my wife and I separated, we went
to court to fight for custody
> of the dog. I said, "Your Honor, I
had Sex before I was married but
> Sex left me after I was married." The
Judge said, "Me too!"
>
> Last night Sex ran off again. I spent
hours looking all over for
her.
> A cop came over and asked me what I
was doing in the alley at 4
> o'clock in the morning. I said, "I'm
looking for Sex." -- My case
> comes up next Thursday.
>
> Well now I've been thrown in jail,
been divorced and had more damn
> troubles with that dog than I ever
foresaw. Why just the other day
> when I went for my first session with
the psychiatrist, she asked
> me, "What seems to be the trouble?" I
replied, "Sex has been my
best
> friend all my life but now it has
left me for ever. I couldn't live
> any longer so lonely." and the doctor
said, "Look mister, you
should
> understand that sex isn't a man's
best friend
> so get yourself a dog."
|
fairytale007
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Jul 2007 Posts: 1379 Location: Denver, CO USA
Posted: 01-07-08 02:54am
LMAO That's awesome!
|
young Girl
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jun 2007 Posts: 13936 Location: everythings better in, texas USA
Posted: 01-07-08 02:55am
alright im switching penuts name to sex!
|
Electriceyes
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Nov 2007 Posts: 1061 Location: Monroe, Michigan United States
Posted: 01-07-08 02:57am
hahahahaha... wow.
|
Flurries in the air
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 07 Nov 2007 Posts: 388 Location: Chicago
Posted: 01-07-08 03:13am
lol wow
|
Becky
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Jan 2006 Posts: 6217 Location: London, England
Thanks: 0
Thanked:7
Posted: 01-07-08 03:23am
haha
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AMomOf3
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Jan 2008 Posts: 37 Location: San Diego, CA USA
Posted: 01-07-08 03:38am
Where do you come up with this stuff??
Funny..
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rosejackson
Supporter
Joined: 23 Dec 2005 Posts: 4312 Location: hertfordshire, england
Thanks: 3
Thanked:7
Posted: 01-07-08 05:18am
haha!
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Lilly Ivy
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Aug 2007 Posts: 1409 Location: Moorefield, WV
Thanks: 36
Thanked:63
Posted: 01-07-08 10:15am
haha! See, sex can get you into trouble!!
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mamaTT
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 03 Jan 2007 Posts: 1955 Location: Illinois, USA
Thanks: 8
Thanked:8
Posted: 01-07-08 10:40am
Ha ha!
|
young Girl
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jun 2007 Posts: 13936 Location: everythings better in, texas USA
Posted: 01-07-08 12:09pm
AMomOf3
wrote:
Where do you come up with
this stuff??
Funny..
LOl it was emailed to me by a friend that
does rottie rescue
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