Hello, I'm twenty-two years old and I am a
proud mother of beautiful 9 month old twin
daughters. To give you all some back
story, in the beginning of December my
husband and I re-located from Arizona to
Washington State, due to my husband losing
his job because of his alcoholism and
being consistently late to work for
months. My father welcomed our family into
his home temporarily as a fresh start
until my husband became employed once more
and we could afford an apartment on our
own.
I made it clear to my husband before we
came to WA that he was not to drink in my
fathers home. He agreed to not drink and
that it was a great new start for our
family to become whole again. Needless to
say, he began drinking in my fathers home
after three days of us living here. When
he would ask me if I minded him drinking I
would tell him every time that it made me
extremely uncomfortable and that I was not
happy about it. Which didn't make a
difference in his decision to drink.
My father pulled my husband aside on two
different occasions, making him aware that
he knew he was drinking and that it had to
stop or he was kicking him out of his
home. My husband ended up drinking for
the last time in my father's home last
Saturday and since then it has been an
absolute mess. I've heard everything
imaginable that could be negative about
myself.
Which hurts because he's blaming everyone
but himself for his own actions that
landed him where he is now. I've told him
that he has to spend some time away from
myself and the girls so that he can get
his priorities straight. Is it us or the
bottle? For a couple of years now my
husband has been unable to stop drinking,
unable to help me with our children in the
morning, since about two months after they
were born, and unable to get himself
together.
Am I doing the right thing by separating
from him and letting him get his head
together? I think I am. Ever since this
has happened he's had it set in his mind
that our marriage is over. Maybe to him it
is. I do hope that he loves myself and his
children enough to straighten his life
out. I miss the man I used to know years
ago...anyway, I've rambled on enough.
There's much more but I've already written
a book
Any advice or encouraging words would be
appreciated. I'm sorry this was so lengthy
but I've got a lot on my mind.
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mamaTT
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 03 Jan 2007 Posts: 2006 Location: Illinois, USA
Thanks: 15
Thanked:8
Posted: 01-14-08 14:37pm
I'm sorry you are going through this tough
time. I do think you are right in
separting from him. He needs to get his
priorities straight and put his family
before his alcohol. Has he tried any type
of rehab program? Maybe he could be
talked into that? I hope things get
better for you soon.
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Idony
Supporter
Joined: 23 Sep 2006 Posts: 1611 Location: virginia beach, va usa
Thanks: 11
Thanked:0
Posted: 01-14-08 14:55pm
in my opinion you did the right thing for
you and your babies, none of you deserve
to be with an alcaholic, and if he doesnt
get himself straightened at least you can
get out there and find someone who will be
there for you and your kids
and until then we are here if you need us
good luck
~alicia~
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yellow ribbon
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 07 Dec 2005 Posts: 5554 Location: FL
Posted: 01-15-08 01:34am
from the topic title i thought you ment
you twins were seperated lol.
I think you are 100% in the right to have
a seperation, your husband needs to come
to terms with the fact that hes an
alcoholic and get professional help. I
hope he does and realizes you and those
babies are the best thing in his life.
good luck
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insomanycolors
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Jan 2008 Posts: 4 Location: , US
Posted: 01-19-08 23:34pm
Thank you all for your kind words. I truly
appreciate it
