did you feel any different?

Nope, felt the same - what decisions others make about what age to have children doesn't effect me, so I don't care.

You must be psychic, then, because every mother, regardless of age, feels differently about motherhood in general after she's actually had a baby than before.

I wasn't a teen mother and after having my baby I thought, "How the hell do these kids do it?!" I find it hard enough now and I am 27 and happily married. I think I'd have resented the changes I'd have had to have made to my life if I'd had a baby as a teen.

Ok, I guess I misunderstood her question. Thanks for the explanation.

I never really thought about it before I had my son. I guess I didn't have an opinion on teen mothers before,now that I am a teen mother I have so much respect for them.
I know what they go through because I am going through it myself.
I don't think that many girls will have an opinion on teenage mothers til they become one.

I don't think anyone thinks being a teen mother is easy or that it doesn't take a lot of work. If anything it is just the opposite.

sweet_mom thank you1 thats exactly how i feel about the whole thing
i was just wondering if anyone else felt the same way

Suzy, you honestly never thought about it beforehand? I didn't realize that. I got the opposite impression, that you had it all thought out in advance, etc., etc.

Maybe I'm just misunderstanding this whole thread. It's very possible.

I didn't think about it much before hand. What I did think went something along the lines of having someone to love and someone to love me forever, unconditionally. I wasn't aware of the reality of being a mom.

I think, having a grown child now, I have a completely different perspective on it. Would it be something I wished on anyone? NO. I certainly would not wish it on my children because there is so much time to become a parent and so little time to actually be a kid. Going from barbies to babies in a few short years... there should be more to life.

Sure, I'll be 'young' when my kids are gone, but that is different. I won't be a kid. I'll not have the prom (who knows if I would have liked it!) or a high school graduation, no college dorm living for me, no kicking it around Europe for a summer, no living on the edge of my seat - I just got to be a mom.

You can say that you don't want those things, and thats great - but not ever having had the opportunity to experience them is something entirely different than choosing not to do them.

Plus, it totally sucks when EVERY weekend when all your friends are out on dates and doing movies and stuff - you are stuck at home with a baby. I love my son, but I also would have enjoyed those things as well.

I never thought I'd get pregnant either. Jacob's got low sperm count, we used a condom, and I was on the damn pill.

Fate was pretty damned determined to give me Jayden, I guess XD

I was 18 when I had my daughter. I love her with all of my heart and I wouldn't give her up for the world, but there are lots of things I would change if I could.
For example:
Being flat broke all the time. Not even having enough money left over at the end of some weeks for a Happy Meal.
I wished I could have been around more, but due to having to work to put myself through college I had little options. The welfare route was never for me.
There were so many things I missed. Dance recitals, T-ball games, daycare parties, I could go on and on. It seems I was either at work or school. I regret that my daughter spent more time with my mother than me.
I would have never never let her have any contact with her deadbeat jerk of a sperm donor ever!!! She never would have sat on the steps or by the phone crying over someone she never knew.
And I will admit there were times that I really wanted to go to a concert or a party that my friends were going to and I couldn't. It made me sad

I don't think teen parents are bad. There are quite a few that are wonderful and responsible parents. They think they know what to expect and they are doing what they can to make it work out.
I just think some teens don't realize that kids are a huge huge responsibility. They are not like that baby alive doll that can sit in a closet when you are tired of playing with it. They take so much time, energy, and tons and tons of love, and they are there forever.

before i found out i was pregnant, i thought of teen pregnancy as an irresponsible thing teen girls did or let happen. babies are expensive, how could a teen who is basically still a child themselves raise a new born?
i've always been against abortions, but never in a million years thought i would get pregnant as an 18 year old. i have some friends who are teen parents and they say it is a joy but also a struggle, as is anything really in life...but my views on teen pregnancy deffinately did a 360 when i found out im expecting.

krystine how did your mind change so fast? if you felt it was irresponsiblte then what made you choose to go through with pregnancy?

not trying to pick on ya or anything im just curious to know how you feel about it all; since its so different from my perspective