Joined: 31 May 2004 Posts: 1 Location: Shreveport, LA
Worried Husband In Need of Advice Posted: 05-31-04 19:55pm
My wife is depressed constantly. I feel
it is all my fault. Its almost as if I
cant do anything right at all. Weve been
married about 3 months now and things have
gotten worse. All she wants to do is lay
on the couch all the time and not go out.
She doesnt like going out with friends
and now that shes pregnant I think things
have gotten even worse. We started
arguing alot more and things have left us
both upset quite often over little things.
Ive tried asking what she wants to do
and we could go do it but her answer is
always I dont know or I dont care. When
I ask if we can go do this or do you want
this its always I dont care. Even when
it comes to me asking if I can lay next to
her or just tonight I asked if she wanted
me to change my work schedule to be on the
same shift as her. I feel like im
loosing my wife. Im at all losses as to
what I should do. She refuses to go seek
any kind of help. She even says shes
knows shes depressed but she doesnt want a
fake happy from a pill or go let anyone
get invlovled in our personal life, and
telling us how to run it. She doesnt
give me hugs anymore and she rarely even
says I love you unless I say it to her.
My only glimmer of life is that at night
she always wants me there with her in
bed.....To hold her or rub her stomach.
Im afraid for our baby as well. Ive been
told that depression can cause a
miscarraige and ive even expressed that to
her. She knows everything thats going on
but just doesnt seem to be doing anything
about it. Please help........I need all
the help I can get right now.
Lilstez17 on aim
scott_stesney on yahoo
|
kd
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 31 May 2004 Posts: 9 Location: North Carolina
to Worried Husband Posted: 05-31-04 20:22pm
Hi. I'm a new user, but I hope my advice
might help a bit. When I was pregnant
years ago, I got rather depressed,
although not to the extent that i'm
reading here.
I can appreciate your wife not wanting to
take some happy pill especially when she's
pregnant.
Have you thought of going along on your
wife's next visit to the gynocologist and
telling the doctor what you've written
here? If it seems more urgent, how about
calling your wife's doctor right away and
telling her of your concerns?
I wouldn't wait for someone who's
depressed to take the initiative and call,
often it's hard to get motivated to do
anything in that condition.
Hope this helps.
Also, if you can get your work schedule
changed so that you are with her more
often, it couldn't hurt.
|
Haley
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Feb 2004 Posts: 122
Posted: 06-01-04 21:07pm
I like kd's advice about getting your
ob/gyn involved. I just finished a
12-week group using cbt and it has
eliminated most of my depression and panic
disorder. The two books we used in my
group are really good and I would
recommend them both highly: been there,
done that? Do this! By sam obitz for
anxiety and depression and mastery of your
anxiety and panic-third edition by
michelle craske and david barlow for panic
disorder. The sooner you get your wife
some help the better for her, you and your
baby! Hopefully your ob will play an
active role in getting her the help she
needs.
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