Joined: 31 May 2004 Posts: 852 Location: grand blanc michigan
Guy Problem* Advise Please Posted: 06-13-04 21:56pm
Ok sorry its a little long but advice
would be appreciated..On friday I went out
to the movies with shawn. Shawn is my
ex boyfriend and I was with him when I
found out I was pregnant. But we were
only dating for 3 weeks b4 I found out
that I was (and I had only known him a
month all together) anyhow I really liked
him.. Hes soo cute and he was real nice
to me etc.. (kinda a bit of a partier
tho. But hes definitly improved sence
then) but once I found out I was pregnant,
not too long after, we broke up because he
felt too 'awkward' that it wasnt his and
that he hadnt known me long either and
then dating me while im pregnant with
someone elses kid.....Well we broke it off
on good terms. .But I did resent him
somewhat for not wanting to be with me
because I was pregnant. But at the same
time I kinda understood from his view.
Anyhow, weve still talked on and off
through out my pregnancy, and hes called
every month etc. Just to catch up.
And hes been calling me a little more.
Well anyhow, friday he called as asked me
to the movies and we went. It was fun,
and innocent.....But we never have been
just friends b4 ya know? We just went
right to the dating part. Well saturday
he was gone to the races all day, but he
called me today (sunday) and we talked for
like 40 minutes. I feel like I still
kinda like him tho..But at the same time I
still sort of resent him. Im wondering
if hes just wanting to hang out and talk
as friends or if maybe he still likes me
or something because I was surprised that
hes been calling me so much lately, and
then wanted to hang out and then called so
soon after. But I dont wanna get my
hopes up.. Plus. ..He didnt think he
could be with me then,..And I still am
pregnant..So im wondering if I should just
drop him and not think about him like
that. I mean, maybe he does just want
to be friends. What do u think? O
yeah, hes 22 by the way~
Last edited by KariM1804 on 06-13-04 22:03pm; edited 2 times in total
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little_woman
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Mar 2004 Posts: 765
Posted: 06-13-04 22:00pm
Hey kari,
i think that you should hang out with him
and see where it goes, what do you want to
happen? Dont heighten your expectations
too much so you wont be disappointed but
take it slowly and see what happens, who
knows, you might either get a b.F or a
good friend, either way you will be ok
What do you want? A relationship or would
just friendship be good for you? Know
what you want before you continue talking
to him. Maybe you want more but would you
settle for friendship, then continue on
and see how it goes. But if you'll only
settle for a relationship and you don't
think you can be friends with him if it's
not a relationship then try and find out
what exactly it is with you two. Either
way, you gotta let it play out! But he
would be a fool to let you go! I'd say
give it a shot and see!
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Julymommy72504
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 08 Jun 2004 Posts: 225 Location: Cincinnati, Oh
Posted: 06-14-04 00:50am
I would have to agree with the girls on
this one kari! I mena go for it if you
think you can. Maybe just look at is as
really good friends and see what happens.
I mean you never know could turn out that
he is not feeling to "weird" about it
anymore. Good luck girl you deserve
it!
Lots of love,
heather and hayley
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KariM1804
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 31 May 2004 Posts: 852 Location: grand blanc michigan
Posted: 06-15-04 21:39pm
Hey girls~ well I still dont know.. He
called me sunday after seeing him friday..
Then he didnt call me monday.. But he
called me today again and we talked for an
hour. And b4 he never called me as
frequently at all, maybe every few weeks.
But the past 2 weeks hes been callin alot.
But... Each time we talk (i dont want to
seem like im trying hard or anything) each
time we talk, we dont say 'i'll call u
tomorrow'' or anything.. We just say, ok
well i'll talk to ya later. . . And we
havent made plans to hang out or anything.
But I refuse to ask him or start calling
him. I was going to call him thursday if
I hadnt heard from him after sunday. I
just dont wanna come on strong. But when
we talk, it seems more like just friends..
But like I said b4, we never have been
just friends and I wonder y hes calling
more all the sudden.........Ah I dont
know. .I still kinda like him, but at the
same time he still has alot of growing up
to do..I wish if somethin was going to
happen I could tell!
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newlife
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 Jun 2004 Posts: 874
Posted: 06-16-04 00:40am
Well, I say the next time he calls just
ask him what he really wants. I know that
girls have a hard time doing this but men
do it all of the time. I think that it is
the best way to avoid high hopes or
wasting time. And if he really does want
a relationship ,just take if from there.
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PregnaJordan
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Oct 2003 Posts: 2908
Posted: 06-16-04 09:04am
Hey! My exboyfriends been calling lately
too! Lol, I feel like you--dont wanna get
my hopes up...So im just taking it easy
and seeing how things go...I dont have too
much time to think about it anymore! Im
gettng prepared for lil jaydyn!~...I say
take it slow...If somethings supposed to
happen it will~
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KariM1804
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 31 May 2004 Posts: 852 Location: grand blanc michigan
Posted: 06-16-04 14:33pm
Thanks again girls! Lol I hate guys tho
so I shouldn’t even worry! And jordan ,
same here, I wonder how I will have time
anyhow because I have my baby to worry
about. Buttttttttt I also hate how
stubborn I am! I don’t wanna get my hopes
up either, so I don’t call him, I leave it
up to him, but then I think, maybe he will
think im not interested sence hes doing
the calling?
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linuxChique
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 05 May 2004 Posts: 4535
Posted: 06-16-04 14:39pm
Frankly, I think guessing is for the
birds. Talk to him. Tell him that you
have enjoyed spending time with him and
that you are confused about his motivation
and his intentions. Don't let him
misunderstand you, because that would be
much worse than being embarrased for a
couple of minutes while you try to figure
each other out.
You've never been in this situation
before! You won't find many women who
have experience dating other men during
their pregnancies or shortly after that
aren't the baby's father. He'll
understand. And he'll talk to you.
