I am 16 years old. I have been with my
b/f for 2 years and we did have
unprotected sex this month. He didnt
come, but im still worried that I am
pregnant. I haven't missed a period or
anything, but the day after the last time
that we had sex, I started having really
bad cramps. Thats was 2 days ago.
This morning, I woke up really sick to my
stomach and vomitting. I do have ulcers
and I am used to having stomach problems,
but I never throw up from them. I also
have back problems. My breasts aren't
sore. I cant tell if these are
pregnancy symptoms or not. I am on alot
of medication and do overdose alot, but
the night before I woke up sick, I took
alot to get to sleep. I dont do it on
purpose, but I never throw up from it.
The day that I started getting cramps, I
did eat alot of junk food. I havent
been able to eat at all today. I go to
a phychiatrist for depression and I get
worried very easily so my period is almost
always late by a few days. Its usually
on the 28th. My period isnt due for
another week. I can't tell my mom cuz
she will kick me out and I have no where
to go. I know cuz she kicked my sister
out. What should I do? Am I just
being paranoid? How can I tell if they
are signs that I am pregnant? I cant be
pregnant while im 16!! I am trying not
to worry about anything so my period isnt
delayed so any help at allwould be
appreciated. Thank you!
Last edited by alecia779 on 09-25-03 16:18pm; edited 2 times in total
|
Suzy
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Sep 2003 Posts: 530
Unprotected Sex Posted: 09-23-03 21:16pm
Alecia,
you are in a very big mess girl, you gotta
get some serious help, like now. Anyone
having unprotected sex can quite possibly
be pregnant. If you are, you must get
yourself sorted out with your medications
and depression. I have anxiety and
depression to, but I have it under
control, especially now i'm pregnant, my
doc put me on ciprimil which won't hurt
the baby, and I am feeling better than
ever. Taking cocktails of pills is
naturally going to make most of your
problems worse. Sleeping pills are nasty,
and overdosing on anything can possibly
eventually kill you, not to say if you are
pregnant, what it would do to the baby.
You really need to see a specialist about
your stomach problems, that sounds real
bad. As for your mum, I can understand
she will be upset, but as for actually
kicking you out, it doesn't sound like she
is a loving or supportive mother, so you
are going to have to seek help from a
pregnancy centre and get some help before
you actually tell your mum, so that you
aren't left homeless, unless you can move
in with your boyfriend?? You have lots to
think about alecia, and we are always here
to help you in any way we can. Good
luck!
.::suzy::.
|
alecia779
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Sep 2003 Posts: 25 Location: usa
Posted: 09-23-03 22:10pm
So what are the chances of me being
pregnant do you think? I havent missed
my period or anything, so I dont know.
Is it normal for signs to appear this
early, we only had sex about 4 days ago.
Also, my dad passed away 2 years ago, and
since then my mom and I havent gotten
along. She is supposed to be getting
married to a new guy so she will not put
up with me being pregnant.. I know. She
thinks that I take advantage of her and I
know that she will not support me cuz she
hates my b/f. My b/f is trying to tell
himself that i'm not pregnat, he doesnt
want at kid either. What can I do?
What should I say? I've never been in
this situation before, but I really can't
do this by myself. Thank you so much
for your help
|
Suzy
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Sep 2003 Posts: 530
More Help Tommorrow Posted: 09-23-03 22:32pm
Alecia,
if you come back online tommorrow, nikki,
tanya, jess and lots of other people will
be here, they will be able to give you
more info to help you to, one of them may
even live somewhere closer to you, or know
where specifically you can go to find
help. I'm in australia, so I not familiar
with clinics elsewhere in the world.
.::suzy::.
|
alecia779
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Sep 2003 Posts: 25 Location: usa
Posted: 09-23-03 22:46pm
Thank you so much for your help suzi. I
live in utah, in the united states. I am
really scared and I know that I need help,
and I know that there are places that I
can go, but I want support from my b/f and
my mom, I just dont knwo what to do. I
have 3 brothers and 3 sisters that would
tease me for the rest of my life if they
found out about it. My brothers wife
helps my sister when she needs the morning
after pill, but I dont know if she would
help me, cuz the main thing is I want to
keep it from ruining my moms life.. Cuz I
know thats what she will throw in my face.
I dont want to get more depressed than I
already am. I dont know I am so confused.
I dont know if I can take a test, I am
way too scared to. I will try tomorrow.
My best friend is there 100%, but I dotn
have a car and the only clinics that give
free tests are 40 miles away in salt lake
city. I have no money to go there or get
a test and my mom wouldnt ever give me
any. Thanks for all your help. I need as
much as I can get from anyone that knows
about it, cuz I dont! Thank you.
|
Suzy
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Sep 2003 Posts: 530
Baby Your Baby In Tooele, Utah Posted: 09-23-03 23:04pm
Alecia,
here is something that may interest you,
go to this site and check it out.
***
seems to be a financial assistance program
to help pregnant women in tooele with
their pregnancies if they have no money,
there is also an email address for a baby
nurse at the bottom of the page who is in
your town who I am sure would be willing
to talk to you confidentially through
email. Hope that helps a bit.
.::suzy::.
|
alecia779
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Sep 2003 Posts: 25 Location: usa
Posted: 09-24-03 17:53pm
I talked to my b/f and he is supposed to
go with me to get a pregnancy test. Will
the test still be acurate cuz my period
isnt due for another week? All the stuff
I told you about my meds... Could I be
mixing up the side effects of them with
the symptoms of pregnancy? Is it too
early to show symptoms? Thank you for
your help.
|
Suzy
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Sep 2003 Posts: 530
Test Results Posted: 09-24-03 18:05pm
Yeah i'm not sure alecia, if your period
isn't due for another week I doubt you are
going to get a very accurate result and
you will have to test again in a week if
your period doesn't come just to be sure.
Yeah you are taking a lot of medications
and I don't know if that could effect it,
but I take it your going to a health
clinic for your test ? So i'm sure they
can advise you on how accurate it will be
if you can discuss your medications with
them.
Take care,
.::suzy::.
|
Suzy
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Sep 2003 Posts: 530
Posted: 09-24-03 18:08pm
Alecia,
i am really glad you have the support of
your boyfriend, you are really going to
need it, just remember everyone here wants
to help you whenever we can, so don't
forget to let us know how everything is
going ok.
.::suzy::.
|
nikki_caro
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Aug 2003 Posts: 4922 Location: Right here at work!
Posted: 09-24-03 18:16pm
Id make a reply but suzy did such a good
job of responding!!! Good luck to you on
your test! Please do not keep up the
unportected sex, use condoms and birth
control to save future scares.
|
Suzy
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Sep 2003 Posts: 530
Prevention Posted: 09-24-03 18:29pm
Well said nikki,
the age old saying of "prevention is
better than cure" should up on billboards
with flashing neon lights.
.::suzy::.
|
alecia779
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Sep 2003 Posts: 25 Location: usa
More Advice Please!! Posted: 09-24-03 19:56pm
Is it too early for symptoms to show?
Thanks for all your help and if there is
any more advice you could give me about
anything, please, let me know. Trust me,
I will never have unprotected sex again!
Its too scary.
|
alecia779
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Sep 2003 Posts: 25 Location: usa
Abortion Posted: 09-25-03 15:33pm
Last night, I told my mom that I could
possibly be pregnant. We were joking
around before we started talking about it
so she thought I was kidding. I told
her that I was serious and she was really
mad. At first, she told me to pack my
stuff and get out, but she calmed down.
She kept asking me if I was serious and
asked me when my period was. I told her
its usually on the 28th and she told me
that if I miss it then she will take me to
the doctor. She just said, "i thought
you were smarter than that." she took it a
lot easier than I thought she would. She
will not let me have a baby at 16 (i don't
exactly want a baby at 16 either) so if I
am pregnant, she will make me get an
abortion. I am so scared. My b/f wants
me to get an abortion, too. Is there any
advice anyone who has had an abortion who
could give me advice on what an abortion
is like? Thank you so much.
|
nikki_caro
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Aug 2003 Posts: 4922 Location: Right here at work!
Think Clearly. Posted: 09-25-03 16:26pm
You need to be sure this is something you
want to do. Not what someone is forcing
you to do. You need to think of something
if you dont keep it. Can you ne ok with
this decision? Will you be able to get
over it emotionally. Is this something
you really want?
Now if you keep this baby, is this
something you can handle? Can you afford
the baby? What are you going to do about
school? Will you be ready to grow up
fast?
I saw this on Dr. Phil recently and a 15
year old was asked the same thing(more or
less) you need to be able to handle this.
Not because of what everyone is telling
you. Think about it. Its a baby. Can
you be ready to give it up like that? Ok
lets make a deal. Go for one week
pretending you are aborting it. Go
through the feelings of giving it up.
Then the next week I want you to act like
you are keeping it. What emotions will
you be feeling. Then decide about what
you want to do. This is a big jump
especially for someone whos 16. Please
think about it ok?
P.S. I encourage everyone to watch
Dr.Phil!!!
|
alecia779
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Sep 2003 Posts: 25 Location: usa
Posted: 09-25-03 17:26pm
I would want to keep it, but there is no
way I would be able to afford it. Not
even my mom could afford it. She told me
that she will not be the mother of any of
her kid's babys. I am already in a lot
of trouble for missing alot of school
because of my health problems. I can't
afford to miss anymore school if I want to
graduate. I already tried to talk to my
mom about home school, but she wont let me
do it. The main thing is, my mom doesn't
want me pregnant. I don't exactly want
to be pregnant either, but thats what I
get for having unprotected sex. My b/f
doesn't want me to be pregnant either.
This is a very hard decision. I don't
want a baby at 16, but I don't know if I
could live knowing that I "killed" that
baby. And I know that I am not ready to
have a baby either. My mom is very firm
on the idea of abortion. She doesn't
want my life to be harder than it is. So
I have no idea what to do. But I will
think about all those questions you asked
me. Thank you so much for all of your
help, but if there is anything else,
please, let me know!
|
nikki_caro
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Aug 2003 Posts: 4922 Location: Right here at work!
Posted: 09-25-03 17:42pm
Its not really about what everyone else
wants. You think about what you want.
This is a tough thing to think about.
Nobody in my family would ever think of
abortion. Its you tough it out and thats
that. Look, if you keep it, you cann
apply for medi-cal, wic, food stamps...You
name it. Anything to help you out. And
if your guy doesnt want to be there for
it, he still has to pay. You hit him with
child support and thats an extra 100-200 a
month. The system will make him get a job
or you can get....Whats it
called...Welfare if he doesnt pay. And
that helps alot. There are many programs
out there. Or if you cant keep it why not
give it up for adoption? There are so
many good families who cant have the
blessings you do and they want to adopt so
bad. I know of a lady in here who wants
to adopt but nothing ever falls through
and shes so sad about it. Please think
very hard about this. Its not just a "oh
I cant deal with it, I cant have it..."
you have to think of alternatives. Having
an abortions is one of the hardest things
to go through especially if you are forced
to have it. My sister did it at 16 and
she is on every program out there. Im
sure you can do this. Think hard though
and do what I said about one week, and the
other week.
|
alecia779
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Sep 2003 Posts: 25 Location: usa
Posted: 09-25-03 18:00pm
I do support the idea of adoption and
thats what I would do if I had to go
through the pregnancy, if I wasnt 16. I
have my mom and my b/f and my friends
telling me that I have my whole life ahead
of me and i'm not ready for a baby, or to
go through a pregnancy. I fear going
through the pregnancy and going through
abortion. Which one would be easier
physically? Which one would be easier
emotionally? I dont want to kill the
baby, but I do want what would be good for
myself also. Im not trying to just think
of myself, but I am really scared.
I will do the week thing you told me
about. Thank you so much for your help
nikki.
|
Suzy
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Sep 2003 Posts: 530
Posted: 09-25-03 19:54pm
Alecia,
I have just read all your last posts,
and I am really sorry you are in the
situation you are in. You have lot's to
think about and many decisions to make,
just remember you don't need to go and
have an abortion today. Take some time
out for yourself to think about what you
would like to do, and what will be the
best result for you. In this time maybe
you can talk to your mum and boyfriend,
over time their thoughts toward all this
may possibly change to, maybe you just
need a few weeks to decide what you want
to do. What ever you decide, take care of
yourself....
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