Hi, my gf and I are sexually active but we
always use protection and are fairly
careful. We have had no worries until a
couple of weeks ago. She is supposed to
get her period about the end/start of the
month. She is not real regular, but it is
10 days late and I am really really
scared! She just doesnt want to talk
about it cause it worries her. She has no
other symptoms of pregnancy. Also, if she
is pregnant, which I hope to god she is
not, can we get an abortion without her
parents finding out?. She is 16 and I am
19. I know it prob best to tell the
parents but they will freak and never let
me see her again, and she could get kicked
out of home. Plz help me, please give me
your advice.
|
Suzy
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Sep 2003 Posts: 530
Posted: 10-09-03 01:57am
Dear hambo,
unfortunately condoms do not give you 100%
protection. Your girlfriend really needs
to be on birth control pills or some other
form of contraception that is more
reliable. Condoms are ok for protecting
yourself from sexually transmitted
diseases, but I would not rely on it as
your only protection from an unwanted
pregnancy. If your girlfriend is 10 days
late on her period, then yes it is
possible you have used a condom that has
failed, it may have split or had a hole in
it, and she may be pregnant. However you
did mention it is not unusual for her to
be irregular, therefore it may just be
that, a late period. She is only 16 and
teenagers hormones are still adjusting
themselves, some women don't have regular
periods until they are in their 20's.
Birth control pills would actually keep
her periods regular aswell as protect her
from becoming pregnant, they are 97 -
99.9% reliable. A much better percentage
than condoms. Not all women get symptoms
in early pregnancy, but the most common
symtpoms are usually frequent urination,
sore or tender breasts, sensitive nipples
and nausea. You will need to take your
girlfriend to get a pregnancy test which
you can buy from the supermarket or
chemist. Otherwise there may a clinic
close by who offers free pregnancy tests.
Either way you need to be sure she is
actually pregnant before you worry
yourselves to death. As for an abortion
without her parents knowledge, it really
depends on the laws in your state, but i'm
sure there are places that could help you
if you were to decide on an abortion.
Have you given any thought to the
possibility of maybe keeping a baby and
raising it as a family ? I know you
mentioned that your girlfriends parents
would freak and never let you see her
again, but maybe they wouldn't freak.
They may be upset at first but i'm sure
they would come round after they realise
the child needs it's father, and i'm sure
they would want to be close to their
grandchild. Anyway, both you and your
girlfriend have a lot to think about, and
a very big decision to make. If it turns
out she is not pregnant, please try to
convince her that she needs to be on birth
control of some kind, her doctor would be
happy to talk to her and discuss
contraception options to suit her needs.
Good luck,
.::suzy::.
|
Farah
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 03 Oct 2003 Posts: 201
Posted: 10-09-03 02:22am
Like suzy said, she may just be
experiencing what most girls her age
experience, irregular cycles. Definately
buy a test and then you'll know. Don't
do anything rash in the moment of fear.
You may both end up regretting it. My
brother and his girlfriend were the age of
you and your girlfriend when they got
pregnant. Their son is a beautiful baby.
I'm not telling you not to do it, but you
do want to really consider all of your
options before making any concrete
decision.
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