Help!!!! Misery On Account of My Labia Minora :'( Posted: 10-27-04 20:57pm
Okay, i'm not sure if this is an
appropriate topic but for a very long time
i've been struggling with severe low
self-esteem on account of this problem and
this is the only place I could think to
go. I'm a little embarassed by this post
but hungry for some advice, consolation,
etc etc
ever since hitting puberty i've had the
notion in my head that I am ugly and
deformed. This is because my labia minora
is significantly larger than my labia
majora and protrudes out.
Only a month ago did I find out that I
wasn't a "freak" or "disfigured" or
something to that extent. I've been under
the impression that I am "ugly down there"
since fifth grade. While I should be
relieved that there are other women with
vaginas like my own, i'm not.
I have felt terribly repressed in more
ways than one. I restricted how intimate
I could get with a significant other and
inevitably stunted relationships. It's
not that I didn't want to be closer to
this person, it's just that I didn't want
them to see me. . .Also, it's
uncomfortable and occasionally embarassing
to wear certain clothes and swimsuits.
I have read articles claiming that some
men prefer larger labia minoras, finding
them more erotic. In some cultures, it is
a superior sign of beauty to small labias
that stay tucked within. But even this
doesn't help me.
I'm a girl, I actually have a vagina and I
still had little concept of what a
"normal" vagina was. How could I expect
a guy to know any different, especially
seeing as how this one in particular is a
virgin. If anything, he's been exposed to
a million perfect airbrushed porno
pictures. And that certainly won't help
me. If i, myself, thought I was shameful
and ugly---what's to keep him from
thinking so? I know that you probably
want to say that he'll love me for me, not
my vagina, but that's a hard thing to
hear....It's not really as comforting as
one would think.
Is there anyone out here how has a similar
labia minora to my own? Have sexual
partners ever commented on it? Do men
actually find it attractive or are they
repelled by it? Also, has anyone had a
labiaplasty? That procedure sounds like
an extreme, but I have been so miserable
on account of myself down there, as vain
as this sounds. . .If so, was the
labiaplasty as satisfactory as some claim?
Was the recovery inordinately painful?
What's the minimum age or price for a
labiaplasty?
The idea of surgery scares me. But so
does that website to which I linked
above...
I guess i'm just looking for some
reassurance, seeing as i've found it
nowhere else. . .
Any response would be greatly appreciated
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fighter12389
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Oct 2004 Posts: 32 Location: minnesota
Posted: 10-27-04 23:34pm
Hi! Well actually this is a question
foryou. Now I don't want to sound stupid
or anything but what are the labia minora
and the labia majora? Where exactly are
they? I this sounds stupid but i'm tring
to understand the situation.
Thankyou
|
darkV
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 26 Oct 2004 Posts: 43
Feel Beautiful! Posted: 10-28-04 12:47pm
You poor thing, I know what you feel like.
I thought the sam thing about myself for
a long time. It took a fair ammount of
reading, femminist books mostly, to
realize two things: one, vaginas are as
different as breasts, area as different as
hair types. This is really true. Ive
actually looked at a picture book (not
porn, since porn is all faky aribrushed bs
and you should never compair yourself to
it!) of vaginas and realized they are all
different, and have different sized
labyas. Number 2: all vaginas are
beautiful! They are all wonderful life
giving flowers. I pormise you that once
you accept these things you will view
yourself as bautiful, with more confidence
and your lover will see that confidence
and see the beauty of your vagina! I went
through the same years of torture for
nothing. My boyfriend loves it caus I
love it too.
Darkv
|
catch22
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 27 Oct 2004 Posts: 3 Location: tuscaloosa
Posted: 10-28-04 16:07pm
But a guy has never said anything about
it? I can't imagine how hurtful it'd be
to get to the point of being able to
expose myself for a guy I care about so
much and then have him....Disgusted isnt
the right word but its the only one that
comes to mind :-/
oh, and fighter12389----there are two sets
of "lips" on the vagina, one is external
and the other pair (labia minora) stays
tucked inside the external one (labia
majora). However, some women are
different and their labia minora is
larger/longer than that of the labia
majora. For a long time I thought I was
just messed up down there, and that
feeling of being 'ugly' was so deep and
lasted for so long that the knowledge that
i'm not the only female with this still
falls short of consoling me. It's been
kind of drilled into my brain ever since
puberty. :-/ more and more i'm realizing
that vaginas really are unique to each
person, just as the rest of the body is.
Some have internal labia minoras, some
don't, some even have assymetrical lips.
The thing that bothers me is its taking so
much effort on my part to come to love my
vagina (or at least stop hating it), how
can I expect a guy to accept me? And
articles like the one I linked to above
certainly don't help. . .There is a
procedure called labiaplasty that reduces
the labia minora's size/length/whatever.
Surgery is a big extent for vanity, seeing
as how I haven't had any health problems
insofar on account of it. . .The real
fear is being labeled a freak or
something, it's a kind of juvenile fear I
guess, but it's pretty real. I was just
hoping someone could clue me in on the
reactions of males to vaginas like my own
:-/ i've never told anyone about this
because i'm too timid and besides, when
does that come up in casual conversation
lol? Just looking for a few answers. If
i'm lucky, the answers wont hurt too
terribly bad.
|
juniper
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Oct 2004 Posts: 65 Location: Southern California
Posted: 10-28-04 22:19pm
I have one of those strangely formed inner
labia. The right one is much longer than
the right and can stick out from the outer
(like i'm sticking out my tongue or
someting). Both are long, just one is
longer.
I've never, ever, had a guy comment on it.
Never. I've never had any man say that a
vagina is disgusting. I've never had my
guy friends say that they ever thought
that any woman's vagina was unappealing.
Guys love vaginas. Period, there's no way
around it. They associate the look of
them with the feeling of pure pleasure
they get and they can look a hundred
different ways and they're gonna like them
no matter what.
My current partner loves to look at my
vagina and play with my labia. I've got
no complaints either.
The only thing I have to caution is to
make sure that it doesn't get folded
against the penis when he enters you, it's
not very comfortable to get it caught up
inside the vagina during intercourse.
Don't make a problem where there is no
problem. You're getting worried about
something that isn't any deal at all.
Go read the vagina monologues. You'll
feel amazing afterwards.
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JanetBee
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 28 Apr 2004 Posts: 332
Posted: 10-29-04 12:47pm
Ohmigod, that is the most reprehensible
website I have ever seen -- trying to make
women as paranoid about their genitals as
they are about the breasts!
Anyway, it's not even accurate - the
vagina is the bit inside, and the labia
(or "lips") are the outside bits. Just
like penises and testicles, these come in
all different sizes. I have never heard
of men caring much at all about what they
look like -- mine really does like to kiss
them and they are quite obvious, real
lips!
I really wish they would educate young
girls a bit more about their bodies. We
are all so worried that men won't like us
the way they are. But in fact they do --
and part of what is interesting is the
great variety.
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darkV
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 26 Oct 2004 Posts: 43
Posted: 10-29-04 13:19pm
That websight is some nazi patriarchal
caca if ive ever seen it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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2ferano
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Dec 2003 Posts: 3717
Posted: 10-31-04 17:39pm
I didn't look at the website because I
don't particularly care to look at
vaginas.
But honestly, love yourself! Seriously
unless you get with a gynecologist the guy
really isn't even going to notice. (and
if you were with a gyno then he would
already know about it!) yeah, they might
notice that it doesn't look like big tit
betty on their little porno, but then what
woman does? Honestly, I don't really
think a guy will care as long as he has a
place to stick it. Sorry to be blunt,
but really. We are all different and it
is okay.
Personally, I think surgery is extreme.
But, then it is your body, not mine so
that is up to you. Do you really want to
risk having complications and such? Good
luck to you! Love yourself!
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1sttimemama
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 24 Oct 2004 Posts: 198
Posted: 11-13-04 15:11pm
That website is so doing it horrible....I
cant believe they actually have like the
perfect vagina recipe...Thats disgusting
"helping women boost their selfesteem" no
namers
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sarahcarr_1980
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Jul 2007 Posts: 2 Location: rotherham
Hope This Helps Catch 22 Posted: 07-04-07 10:48am
Hiya i have the same problem and have been
too embarreced to even tell my partner of
10 yrs am 26 and just feel ugly un
natural, so i wrote a letter to the docter
as i just could not face him he wrote back
with a request to c him so i went as i now
did not have to explain my self to him he
refered me to see a gyno at the hospital i
went we talked and he could see how upset
it was making me i asked if you could have
labia reduction sergury on the NHS as i
have looked in to having it done privetley
and it costs £4000 i posibley could never
afford that. He wrote aletter to the PTA
asking for funding and they agreed to fund
me the opperation on the NHS so i go and
have the opp in a few weeks. I just felt
the same as you too embarreced to talk but
if you write a letter expressing you
emotions and how it makes you feel am sure
they will refer you if thats what you want
of course.
Hope this information as helped
s
arahcarr_1980@yahoo.co.uk
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bjmcfarland
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Aug 2007 Posts: 19 Location: ,
Labia's Posted: 08-04-07 20:19pm
catch22:
I hope you don't get down on
yourself,Having labia's larger than others
is not a bad thing, you just have to get
used to them and be happy. You will find
out that yours are more sensitive and
having a boyfriend that likes to go down
on you and give you pleasure will be to
your advantage, If when you are older and
you find that they get in the way of you
being a women than think about having
labioplasty, this is where the doctor
size's your labia Minora to your liking.
Don't be too hasty live and have a good
time first, There is nothing wrong with
you. If you need to talk to some one see
your doctor ,if you can't talk to your
mother.
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Tylanas
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 Jul 2005 Posts: 12985
Thanks: 3
Thanked:0
Posted: 08-04-07 22:30pm
I want to kill that website!! I shall
respond with a different website!! Here:!
Catch22:
Here are some web sites to go to and
research information
Use the Mayo Clinic's web site, this is
associated with the Mayo Clinic in
Minnesota, Another one to check out is
webmd.com. this is also a good sitre to go
too.
Be careful about goggling certain words
because you never know where it will bring
you. I'm working in the Health care field
and will help you as much as I can and not
cross the illegal limits of the law for
your safety as well as mine I hope this
helps you
|
jakii
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 10 Aug 2007 Posts: 59 Location: ,
Does It Even Matter That Much So Long As It's There? Posted: 08-11-07 15:22pm
i didn't even know having
large/small/uneven labia was a good thing
or a bad thing i just thought it was just
a thing like ... wait is it a good thing
or a bad thing?... isn't it like having
freckls and not having freckles ... i
don't think it really matters that much
...ur gonna be fine
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so_ima_man
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Oct 2007 Posts: 1
I Find Large Labias Very Erotic And Sexy Posted: 10-23-07 17:19pm
probably the same as a woman that finds a
large penis erotic and sexy. I love the
way a large labia looks in bathingsuits or
bikinis. don't be ashamed of it, flaunt it
I say. You only live once, no use cowering
inside the house. I wish I had a 8 inch
penis but 6 1/2 seems to be enough for the
woman in my life. I make up for it in
width though. No one is ever satisfied
completly with their sex organs or bodies
in particular. just my 2 cents.
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orthogirl
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Sep 2006 Posts: 69 Location: NC
Posted: 10-26-07 17:37pm
sweetie, i have pretty large labia minora
and for a long time i didn't want to have
sex. i lost my virginity late but, when i
finally did.. i noticed that GUYS DONT
CARE. one day you'll realize that for
yourself hehe.. and no guys penis is
perfect, either..
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Colie9706
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 03 Nov 2007 Posts: 12 Location: Twin Cities, MN USA
Hi! Posted: 11-03-07 01:34am
I have a freak vagina too. Big labia
minora, one larger than the other.
I convinced myself I would get surgery.
My first and current boyfriend scared me
because I was very embarrassed of how I
looked.
I remember when he begged to see it and I
was terrified. But I finally gave in and
showed him and guess what...
He dumped me.
..JK!! He loved it!
Guys don't care and neither should you
because it's NORMAL.
The only reason to consider labioplasty is
if your "lips" are getting painfully
pulled in during sex. Which has happened
to me. Other than that, once you get a guy
and realize he doesn't care and he LOVES
your vag, you won't even care what it
looks like anymore!
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Schizophreniahealth
This page was last updated on June 11, 2008
He loved it!
Guys don't care and neither should you
because it's NORMAL.
