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JeNNy985
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Oct 2004
Posts: 295
Location: INDIANA!!!
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Why Do I Want Him Back? I'm Soo Stupid!
Posted: 11-09-04 14:33pm
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I don't know if this is normal but I hate
it. Ok, so...Me and the ex boyfriend were
on and off for 4 years. All through high
school. When we met ..He was sooo sweet!
We were in love before we saw eachother
and met face to face! We fell in love
with eachother based on personality alone.
When we met I was 14 and he was 15 but we
were still in the same grade at school.
Our sophmore year he started to become
well known for football. It changed him
completely. He started lying to me and
cheating and all kinds of stuff. He has
screwed me over sooo many times it's
unbelievable..Lie after lie ...And girl
after girl that he messed with behind my
back. Everytime we would break up or get
in a fight he would say things like.." i'm
in love with you jennifer, I don't know
why I do the things I do." "i promise I
will never hurt you again." "i need
you..Life without you just would not be
right..I want to marry you one day
jennifer!!" "you are my first love...I
want to be together when we go to college
because ..I don't want you to have the
opportunity to meet somebody better than
me" (who isn't better than him?!?) he also
said mean things to me..He was very
verbally and emotionally abusive. Why do
I miss him??? Why why why????? I don't
understand! I'm sooo stupid for wanting
to talk to him. I know it's impossible
for him to be the way he used to be! I
know him changing and settling down and
not lying to me..Just isn't going to
happen ever! He was my first kiss, my
first love, my first everything! But he
was so mean to me..Why do I want him back
in my life?? Any advice would be great!
Sorry for venting girls..But it's been
bugging me
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Michelle1337
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Aug 2004
Posts: 1739
Location: Houston, Texas
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Posted: 11-09-04 14:39pm
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Wow...I totally know how you feel!
Everything you just said (except the
abusive stuff) is so totally my ex
boyfriend too!
All I can say is that you just have to
force yourself to stay away...And
eventually, with time, you will get over
him. Atleast I hope...Lol seeing as i'm
in the same place as you I wouldnt really
know now would i?
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JeNNy985
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Oct 2004
Posts: 295
Location: INDIANA!!!
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Posted: 11-09-04 14:41pm
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Don't you hate it? Don't you hate knowing
that he is the problem and the one that's
wrong but you want to talk to him sooo
bad?? My ex goes to uk and he's away..But
still! I miss him sooo much. I miss the
way we used to be and the way we used to
be happy with eachother...
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Michelle1337
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Aug 2004
Posts: 1739
Location: Houston, Texas
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Posted: 11-09-04 14:43pm
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Yup, it sux ass! I want him back sooo
bad but at the same time I remember how
much of a jerk he is...Its like mixed
feelings. Its so annoying!
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JeNNy985
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Oct 2004
Posts: 295
Location: INDIANA!!!
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Posted: 11-09-04 14:47pm
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I just wish I would meet somebody else
already ya know? Like i'm not in love
still ...I think I just feel weird w/o the
feeling that I can call him or talk to him
..Or just that attention that I once got
from him! I mean he lied to me about soo
much stuff! He's like a manwhore...A
liar...An problem...There's nothing that
would benefit me..It would just hurt me
more but for some reason I wanna talk to
him! I just wish he would say sorry and
mean it..And act like he used to! ....You
are right..It is annoying!
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Michelle1337
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Aug 2004
Posts: 1739
Location: Houston, Texas
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Posted: 11-09-04 14:50pm
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I know exactly how you feel. Chris was a
lying, cheating, health questions...But
yet I still want to talk to him. Its
craziness I tell you! I just wanna move
on!!
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JeNNy985
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Oct 2004
Posts: 295
Location: INDIANA!!!
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Posted: 11-09-04 14:52pm
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You are soooo right about wanting to move
on! I'm ready to just be with the guy
that i'm going to marry ya know? That way
I dont have to deal with all the other
lying cheating no namers out there!!! I
just want the perfect guy for me already
and i'll be happy for the rest of my
life!!!!!
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Michelle1337
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Aug 2004
Posts: 1739
Location: Houston, Texas
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brittany34
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Nov 2004
Posts: 33
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Posted: 11-09-04 15:07pm
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Sorry, I don't really know you or your
situation, but maybe it's just the thought
of "what if" I know when I was pregnant,
my ex called me and wanted me back. Even
though he hit me and ruined a good 2 years
of my life and scarred me for the rest.
I always wonder "what if" we would have
stayed together? I probably wouldn't
have had my beautiful baby girl then. I
probably wouldn't have gone back to my bf
before him and figured out that he was the
one for me. But what helps me is to
think of all the fun and happy times we
did have and know that they will never
happen again with him, but better times
will happen with other people.
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JeNNy985
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Oct 2004
Posts: 295
Location: INDIANA!!!
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Posted: 11-09-04 15:10pm
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Aww thanks! That is good advice! I'm
jenny by the way! 19 and not preggo or
ttc! I'm from indiana...And i'm a
freshman in college!
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hm_03
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 30 Apr 2004
Posts: 483
Location: Massachusett
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Posted: 11-09-04 15:13pm
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Girl it's really hard to get over your
first love but when you meet someone
better than him you'll realize that your
happiness means more
he has been abusive and a liar how could
you want to be with someone like that.
Love is painful but it is also suppose to
be happy too. You should not want to be
with someone who hurts you emotionally you
are worth more than that.
I know it's hard and but pain can heal
itself within time your wounds and hurt
will go away and you will be fine with out
him believe me it happens to everyone.
Sorry you have to go through and I really
hope that you can be strong enough to
overcome this and you have to believe in
yourself and know that you don't deserve
that
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brittany34
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Nov 2004
Posts: 33
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Posted: 11-09-04 15:15pm
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You're welcome. Now I need to add a
picture to my posts 
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JeNNy985
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Oct 2004
Posts: 295
Location: INDIANA!!!
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Posted: 11-09-04 15:18pm
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I know I can do it..But it's just I feel
stupid for thinking about him sometimes
and wanting to talk to him sometimes or
thinking about "what if" situations! I've
always been the strong female that doesn't
need a boyfriend to have fun and be happy
and I feel like he took that away from me.
Me going back to him so many times just
made my self confidence and self respect
decrease more and more and I don't feel as
strong as I did before we met. I really
thought he was the one I was going to
marry. I couldn't see my future without
him and he's the only person I could
picture myself growing old with. Oh
well..I just gotta focus more on other
things besides him I guess...It just sucks
because it could be perfect if he didn't
choose to do the things he does...
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smith8500
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 Sep 2003
Posts: 6623
Location: Louisiana
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IDABABY
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 12 Mar 2004
Posts: 2236
Location: ***Wisconsin Baby***
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Posted: 11-10-04 00:28am
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Think about you you you and do what is
best for you you you!! I know its hard,
but you have to put yourself first...And
really think things through with things
like this.
Kristin
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CAMAROGIRL82
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Aug 2004
Posts: 96
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Posted: 11-10-04 11:31am
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Hey girlie I know how you feel I am going
through something similar right know.
Except when my boyfriend or ex ( not sure
what we are cuz he wont tell me a direct
answer) he will say ignorant things and
when I try to leave he becomes so sweet
and my dumd a** always falls for it. I
am trying to figure out what to do. I
would say is do what your heart tells you.
If you ever need someone to chat you can
im me on aol xcamarogirl82x or yahoo at
camarogirl82 hope things get better for
you. Lots of love
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JeNNy985
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Oct 2004
Posts: 295
Location: INDIANA!!!
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Posted: 11-10-04 15:14pm
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Thanks girls!! My aim is jenybeny13 and
i'm glad i'm going through this with other
girls!
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Daile
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Oct 2004
Posts: 319
Location: Missouri
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Posted: 11-11-04 03:52am
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I understand how you're feeling. My ex
did pretty much everything your's did, and
I kept taking him back. Now, two years
after I finally left him, he's started
calling me again. And it's good! Even
though he hurt me so much and everything,
and I hated him for sooo long, I think
talking to him now is helping me. I
mean, I have the perfect guy and would
never go back, but finally knowing why he
did what he did is sooo wonderful. Like,
now I don't wonder all the time if I just
wasn't good enough or whatever...It's
helping in my new relationship, too, cause
my selfesteem is going up again.
Daile
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JeNNy985
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Oct 2004
Posts: 295
Location: INDIANA!!!
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Posted: 11-11-04 11:57am
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Did he tell you why he did the things he
did?
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forever_in_love811
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 08 Nov 2004
Posts: 141
Location: Statesville NC
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Posted: 11-11-04 13:15pm
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Hey jenny!! I'm so sorry to hear that you
are hurting because of this guy who treats
you like caca!!! It's a very good thing
that you realize he treats you bad and you
want to get over him. I have many friends
whos boyfriends treat them the same way
yours does yet they continue to let it
happen. I'm very fortunate when it comes
to guys.. I'v never had one mis treat
me...I just never have put up with the
caca!!! I did go through a very bad
breakup that screwed up my whole life
though. I dated this guy for two years
(age 15-17) and I guess he just realized
before I did that we weren't meant to be.
So, we broke up about a year ago. It took
me 10 months to get over him completly!!
I got so depressed that I quit school,
started smoking weed (alllll the time) and
got very sezually active  I
wanted him back so bad, but he just didn't
want to be with me anymore, he had found
a new girlfriend. I dated lots of guys
after him but it seemed like i'd never
find the love I had with him in another
guy!! I did though!!! Three months ago
(today) I met and feel in love with the
man i'm going to marry. I'm 18 and he is
19. What I had with my ex was special and
always will be because he was my first
love (my first everything) but it was
nothing compared to what I have with my
boyfriend now. I said all that to say
this: nobody can help you get over him,
you'll get over him when your heart is
ready to. Just be strong sweetie you'll
make it through this...I promise you
will!!! It'll probably be the hardest
thing you have ever done but you'll be
sooo much stronger in the end!!! You'll
also find that guy that you are suppose to
spend the rest of your life with, and when
you do, you'll know it, and this guy you
are talking about will only be a memory.
Good luck hun!!! You're such a
sweetheart...Hang in there!!! Please
don't waste anymore of your time on this
problem!!! It's time you started looking
for the man of your dreams!!!
 teresa
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