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Not Sure What to Say And Nobody to Talk to

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medic2288p

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Nov 2004
Posts: 4
Location: ky
Not Sure What to Say And Nobody to Talk to
Posted: 11-20-04 16:51pm

My husband and I have been together for 10 years. We have been married for 3. We have never discussed children. He is 30 and I am 28 soon to be 29. I have always wanted kids and I am only assuming that he does. But, we never talk about it. All of our friends have kids. We are both paramedic/firefighters and our jobs take alot of our time. I have almost came to the idea that I will not be having a child. I figured that if we were going to have one, we would have already started discussing it. The rest of my problem is that my brother in law is proposing to his girlfriend on xmas. She wants to have a baby as soon as possible. That is all she talks about. The inlaws will be so happy about that, they want grandkids soon. I don't know what to do. I know that I am rambling, I was just wondering if anybody had any advice or input.
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mommax3

Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Nov 2004
Posts: 1134
Location: Virginia

Posted: 11-20-04 16:57pm

Hi sweetie
all I can say is you should talk to your husband
if you have been together thislong I am sure there is nothing you can't talk to him about, and you probably already know the best way to go about it
good luck, babies r truly a blessing and I hope you have that blessing if it what you really want
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medic2288p

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Nov 2004
Posts: 4
Location: ky

Posted: 11-20-04 17:03pm

Thank you for a reply so fast. I know that I could probably talk to him about it, it is just I am always the one to talk about all of our troubles. He never just comes out and puts for the effort. This is not like buying a new car, it is a life altering thing and I just wish that it could be a mutual thing instead of me having to bring it up. This should be something that married people talk about and I am not getting any younger. I am afraid that if I don't suck it up and say something now, it will be too late before I do. Thanks again for listening!
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mommax3

Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Nov 2004
Posts: 1134
Location: Virginia

Posted: 11-20-04 17:11pm

Well, maybe he is thinking about it too and doesn;t want to make you feel like you have to be in that role, y aknow what I mean? But I say go for it, put it out there, at least then if he isn;t already he will be thinking on it and you could be surprised by his reasction
how is he around babies and children?
Lots of luck
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medic2288p

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Nov 2004
Posts: 4
Location: ky

Posted: 11-20-04 17:31pm

Oh, he is wonderful around kids. I used to be a nanny, along time ago, he had more to do with the kids than I did. I think he would be a good dad, but my worry is that if it is this hard to talk about this now, how hard will it be if it happens. Md appts, names, all the stuff that comes along with it you know?
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Tazzy D

Advanced Support Team
Joined: 30 Oct 2004
Posts: 3718
Location: , va

Posted: 11-20-04 17:38pm

medic2288p wrote:
oh, he is wonderful around kids. I used to be a nanny, along time ago, he had more to do with the kids than I did. I think he would be a good dad, but my worry is that if it is this hard to talk about this now, how hard will it be if it happens. Md appts, names, all the stuff that comes along with it you know?



you seem to love your husband and vice versa. If you are scared to talk or dont want to spark the converstion by him a card or write him a letter telling him your feelings.. He will reply to you.. Give it a shot come forward or do it with the card or letter. Good luck hun you seem to have you mind set here is your push/shove good luck
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medic2288p

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Nov 2004
Posts: 4
Location: ky

Posted: 11-20-04 17:40pm

Thank you ladies so much for your help. It is something that has been bothering me for awhile and I know it will not get better if not talked about. I will think about how I will go about it and I will let you all know what happens. Thanks again, you have both been great, aw
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Tazzy D

Advanced Support Team
Joined: 30 Oct 2004
Posts: 3718
Location: , va

Posted: 11-20-04 17:44pm

medic2288p wrote:
thank you ladies so much for your help. It is something that has been bothering me for awhile and I know it will not get better if not talked about. I will think about how I will go about it and I will let you all know what happens. Thanks again, you have both been great, aw



ive got even a better idea... If you have cable turn on the baby channel when both of you are home, and make a commit like that would be nice hun awh look
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mommax3

Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Nov 2004
Posts: 1134
Location: Virginia

Posted: 11-20-04 17:51pm

Yeah, there you go
good idea tazzy

and if you go with the letter/card, at least you can get all of your feelings out there at once without having to stop

if he is excited as you are about it all of that other stuff just comes along with the package and is exciting too..... Besides the most appts for normal preg are at the end of the preg anyway. Other than that it is once a month
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Tazzy D

Advanced Support Team
Joined: 30 Oct 2004
Posts: 3718
Location: , va

Posted: 11-20-04 18:02pm

Unless you are a high risk like me having a doc appt ever 2 wks

im 13 weeks and 5 days today
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mommax3

Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Nov 2004
Posts: 1134
Location: Virginia

Posted: 11-20-04 18:03pm

Shhh!!
Don;t scare her!!!
J/k lol
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