I Think I (and My Family) Have Hiv????

I will try to keep this condensed, it is pretty heavy stuff though. Please read. Thanks.
To keep this short, about 2 years ago (december 2001), I had a very, very severe illness reaction that occured after a sexual encounter. In short, I had every hiv symptom in the book, only at that time I did not know that my symptoms matched hiv. I had this deadly, severe reaction about a couple weeks after the sexual exposure. Like I said it will be hard to keep this short because of everything that has happened since the end of 2001, til the present 2004. But intially I had a mild case of diahrrea. Then I had the usual flu symptoms and I felt like I was getting better. Then a few days after that, all heck broke loose(and that is putting it mildly). I begin having symptoms that were foreign to me, never had anything like this before. I still didn't think hiv because I didn't even much know what that was or what that involved. The symptoms that I had(and I will do my best at remembering all of them)were so severe, that I had to go to the e-room because I did not know what was going on in my body. Believe me, the symptoms are burned into my mind. I will the name them to the best of my memory. I had severe(and I do mean severe)burning in my chest and mouth. The when I went to the e-room, they looked at my mouth and said that it looked like thrush and a immune response(this was the e-room doctor). Other symptoms that I experienced were rash on my arms, severe breathing problems(almost like pneumonia), severe body crippling body pain(at times I could not even get up or walk), blurred vision and white speckles in front of my eyes(which I still experience to this day, they haven't gone away), severe lymph node pain(under arm, etc.), and you know what I am forgetting some because it has been a couple of years ago. Let's just put it this way, the symptoms that you read for symptematic hiv response, I had all of them. I seriously(and I do mean seriously)wanted to die to rid myself of this pain! Oh, I did also have 2 grandmaul seizures(and as I think more symptoms will come back to me but). It was a sickness that I wouldn't want my worst enemy to have to go through this!!(an I do mean that). So, I finally a doctor asked me if I had any sexual exposure. Thats when the gates blew open. So hang with me here(i know this is long but all important). So from that time I had an hiv antibody test, about a month after. This test was negative and with all that had transpired was unbelievable. So, I did take a hiv test even as late as 2003 of august, from the blood bank center. Back in 2002, I did also have a pcr test. These tests have been negative. So I guess(and you can imagine hard to believe from all of the sickness I went through that was after the sexual exposure), even though I was continued sick(with lighter symptoms, and by the way ongoing til this present day. I struggle with mouth yeast problem, body pain, etc. Some days I feel normal and think I am out of the woods and then the symptoms come back again(it is so hard to live with this pain and weird symptoms). So, even then, I just excepted that I have hiv(because what else matches?)and I am going to live the best way I can. The problem has come in, in that back in 2003 january, my wife and I had unprotected sex(because my hiv tests were negative), but I was so unsure, and you will see why now. So, my wife was nursing at the time, so I was doubly concerned. Well, to close this out, my wife didn't really get weird sick but has broken out and had face problems(which she never had before in her 28 years-she had a perfect face). She also has a continued white tongue, like I have had since I got intially sick, til this present day. She also had skin peeling in the cheek, which I also had and have occasionally. Lately, she has had body itching all over her body and a little bit of welting in some area's(looks like hives or raised red bumps). Also, when my wife was breastfeeding, at one point my 1 1/2 year old daugter got so severely sick one time, we took her to 'urgent care" at a doctor's clinic. At that time when she got so sick she had thrush in her mouth(thats what the doctor said it was). Since that time, my daughter has been pretty healthy, except for(like my wife and i)she has a white tongue also. So, I will shut-up now, but doctor salveson, does my family have hiv and just not been detected yet(from the sound of all of this)? I know you are a great hiv professional and work with hiv and patients everyday. Does my experience sound like hiv or is all a coincidence? And if it is, why is this sickness ongoing and my wife and daughter have weird symptoms til the present? Also, my wife wanted me to ask if the itching over the body(just started and bad for 1 day)is resemblance of an hiv symptom? I will close with this and then covet your wisdom. The hiv tests would be easier(and remember this is from my heart because I experienced all of this sickness,first-hand)to believe if I would not had all of the symptoms that go along with hiv and also they happened after a sexual encounter(not my wife unfortunately, much to my wrongdoing). And even then, I thought, oh well, I have a sickness whatever it is but as long as it just affects me, I can live with it. But seeing my wife and daughter have some weird symptoms(that match some of my lighter symptoms), now that is my only concern and fear! I came to the point where I don't care about me, but after my wife and i's one-time unprotected sex since all of this, she and my daughter have experienced symptoms that I recognize, that matched or match mine to the present day. Well, I am done(i know unbelievable), but this is my life now, and my wife is so upset because she wants another baby(and I do too, more than anything), but I will not have unprotected sex because I still am afraid, and as you can imagine, this severely hurts or relationship. Please read and with all of your years of dealing with hiv and patients, does it sound like my wife, daughter and I have hiv??? I hate myself for all of this that I have brought on my family. And I am not making any of this up, it is and has been all true. Thanks.
Now, it is critical, because we want to have a baby and I am afraid and my wife wants to so bad.