Hi,iam in a relationship with a guy that
cant let go of past relationships.His old
girlfriend moved away we live together and
I thought that we had a future together
the first time she came home he slept with
her twice. It was at the beging of our
relationship and he wasnt sure yet what he
wanted til the day she left to go back
then he wanted me. Her dad calls our
house all the time he is old and dont have
no family around so my boyfriend says he
feels bad for him. I am insecure alot of
it is to do with my childhood. So we
fight about this. This last weekend she
was in town I am almost 100 percent
positive he seen her even though he says
no. I know he didnt sleep with her cause
he was with me all weekend. But I could
tell he wanted to go see her. I dont know
what todo. He tells me its over between
them. I am to the point that I dont care.
Evey time this happens it just kills the
love I feel for him .
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sparklypixie12
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 Sep 2003 Posts: 3099
Posted: 10-21-03 13:48pm
No message
Last edited by sparklypixie12 on 11-03-03 20:46pm; edited 1 time in total
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barnes
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 24 Oct 2003 Posts: 8 Location: NE PA
Go Bye Your Gut Feeling Posted: 10-24-03 11:34am
My opinion is that you should leave the
relationship....If he truly loves you and
is not still messing around with this girl
all will work out. But the first and
foremost you have to have a partner you
can fully trust and not question..If you
dont get that feeling(sounds like you dont
to me)of trust your relationship will
always have problems. Sao maybe a step
back for you two and some therapy will
help. Good luck
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SimplyMe
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Oct 2003 Posts: 8 Location: Pennsylvania
Good Luck Posted: 10-27-03 14:57pm
It’s sounds like you have problems with
trusting him which I don’t blame you.
It’s hard enough building a relationship
when he seems unsure of what he wants, but
it’s a double whammy when there is no
trust within the relationship. Have you
sat down and discussed your feelings with
him? And I don’t mean arguing, but
talking about how you feel about him and
how he feels about you. Trust and
communication are very important aspects
of any relationship; if you don’t have
them, you’re in for a rocky road and a
dead end relationship. I’m not sure how
old you are or how long you have been in
this relationship, but if it’s truly meant
to be let him go and he will return.
From past experiences, I would tell you to
attempt to discuss your feelings without
arguing. If that doesn’t help, then you
both need space to figure out what you
both want in the relationship. Once you
opt for space, make sure you give him
space, don’t attempt to contact him. Let
him contact you. If your love is meant
to be, he will come back. Even though he
has caused the rift in the relationship
with his ex, you will also need to work on
your trust issues if the relationship is
to work. It’s very important that you
truly feel in your gut that he’s seeing
her and not being a little paranoid
yourself. When I was 18 years, I was in
a relationship that resulted in a child.
I tried my best to make the relationship
work for the sake of my child. Well, in
my gut I knew he had been messing with one
of my so-called friends. I hadn’t heard
anything about them through the grape
vine, but it was just the funny way they
acted around each other that gave me a
clue that something happened. I didn’t
know how far it went, but like I said, I
knew something happened. One day he
called me and going by my gut feeling, I
said, “i know about you and ***, how could
you do this to me.” I didn’t say when,
where, or what since of course I didn’t
know. He attempted to deny it at first,
but I was persistent about him lying, I
knew he messed around, and I couldn’t
believe he would do this to me. He
finally told me the truth. I ended the
call with, “you’re such an fool.”
remember, no matter how upset you get,
keep your cool. I hope all works out for
you, either way the wind blows; I wish you
all the happiness in the world. Take
care.
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nikki_caro
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Aug 2003 Posts: 4921 Location: Right here at work!
Posted: 11-07-03 12:23pm
What you see now is how its going to
always be. If he fights over it and then
he cheated on you, why are you with him?
How can you trust him knowing he had sex
with her twice, then came back to you?
Its like hes using you, and your ok with
it. You shouldnt have taken him back. It
can never get better because the dad is
invilved and she visits often. You should
really leave him, its not a healthy
relationsgip like that.
