Im so sick of life right now and I dont
know why im bothering since most have
decided my whole life is fake. So here
goes the whole weekend.
Saturday was the 15th anni of my rents
death, I take shrooms and have bad
flashbacks
today im sh*tting profusely from the
shrooms and found out my fiances 15 y/o
mistress is expecting, and has chlymydia
which I better not have. Cutting is just
nothign anymore, I can barely feel it
anymore.
This is how my life is liek it or not
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1stTimeMom2Be
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Dec 2004 Posts: 466 Location: milwaukee, wi
Posted: 01-17-05 01:15am
Listen sweetie....I dont know that well or
ur whole life story, but from what ive
heard from you so far is not good....U
have two beautiful children that need you,
one especially right now....Look at all
the hurt and depression ur in right now
from not having ur parents around....Now
do u want ur children to end up like
that....Having no parents and doing all
kinds of drugs and tryin to kill
themselves....Thats not something u want
to happen, im sure of it....Just becuz
people on here think ur fake, who
cares...This is a damn internet
site....Dont get me wrong, I love this
site and the people on it but if ur going
to stress urself out becuz of what people
say to you that dont even know you, then u
have a serious problem....U have a life
outside of this forum which is very
real...U have a son that is growing and
needs his mommy and a daughter that is in
critical condition the especilly needs
you....Think about it hun....Have more
respect and love for urself and ur
children...
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l2at24
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Nov 2004 Posts: 1509
Posted: 01-17-05 08:29am
Hey hil. I never knew this other side of
you. I only knew the good mommy side.
I only say that b/c i'm sure you're going
through all this b/c suni was born so
early. She's still in the hospital and I
know what it's like to leave the hospital
w/o your baby. It's probably the worst
feeling i've ever had. She is in good
hands and safe and you don't need to worry
about her. Take care of yourself before
she comes home. And you also have too
many hormones raging.
Please stick with your plan of getting
help. Think about how much you miss your
parents and how much your children will
miss you if anything would ever happen.
Go get the help you want and need. You
can always vent to us. Take care.
Lana
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SamiNSunisMa
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 27 Nov 2004 Posts: 1528
Posted: 01-17-05 11:02am
Its sooo not about beign called fake,
honestly I am hurt, but really not
something to cry over.
I did rehab and I was clean for 2 years
almost.
Idk sami is well sami. He's 4 he lives in
lala land most of the time, I know if I
keep doing it he eventually will remember.
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Tazzy D
Advanced Support Team
Joined: 30 Oct 2004 Posts: 3718 Location: , va
Posted: 01-17-05 11:45am
saminsunisma
wrote:
its sooo not about beign
called fake, honestly I am hurt, but
really not something to cry over.
I did rehab and I was clean for 2 years
almost.
Idk sami is well sami. He's 4 he lives
in lala land most of the time, I know if I
keep doing it he eventually will
remember.
sami im not one to judge anyone or say
that you are wrong. I grew up with a
screwed up life as well. My father was a
drug dealer and user, and he turned my mom
into a user. My father was in and out of
prison and my mom just spent 3 yrs there.
I guess what im trying to get at is I
understand your hurt and pain, and I had 2
sons that where born early and preterm and
I dint know if they where going to make it
from day to day. I took each day one at a
time. Im thankful that I have been strong
enough not to turn to drugs or drinking.
I guess to say I have been scared to try
or do anything because I dont want to turn
out like them or have my children go
through or see the things that I saw. I
hope you try to get some help again for
yourself. Its hard being a mom and it is
very stressful, but our children didnt ask
to be brought here. We brung them here
and now it is up to us to take care of
them and protect them. I seen what you
said about your fiance, and if he is
messing with a 15yr old and got her
pregnant just imagine what else he could
do to someone else. I wouldnt and couldnt
trust him nor would I want to be with him.
You have a daughter now to that you have
to protect from all harm. I hope and pray
that your angel is there for you to help
guide you through all of this. And help
you get back to the person that you really
are and the person that you want to be
again. Im not calling you fake nor will I
ever I dont know your life or you in
person, but what I do know is that you are
human, and we all make mistakes, but in
order to go on we have to learn from our
mistakes. I wish you luck and I am here
if you ever need to vent or talk. Like I
said I have grown up with this all my
life. My parents didnt die , but I didnt
have them either. Again im here if you
need me........
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SamiNSunisMa
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 27 Nov 2004 Posts: 1528
Posted: 01-17-05 11:50am
Ahhh I know he cheated, but really idk
we;ve been together through letters and
person for 8 years now, thats a long time,
idk I cant throw it away yet. Not yet, I
was concerned that he'd forget about our
kids, but he hasnt and straight up told
her (the other girl) that he'd be glad to
pay cs and have vistation if it was his.
Idk he has a thing for damsels in
distress.
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Tazzy D
Advanced Support Team
Joined: 30 Oct 2004 Posts: 3718 Location: , va
Posted: 01-17-05 11:54am
saminsunisma
wrote:
ahhh I know he cheated, but
really idk we;ve been together through
letters and person for 8 years now, thats
a long time, idk I cant throw it away yet.
Not yet, I was concerned that he'd
forget about our kids, but he hasnt and
straight up told her (the other girl) that
he'd be glad to pay cs and have vistation
if it was his. Idk he has a thing for
damsels in
distress.
and that is thing
if it happens once it will happen again.
My dad cheated on my mom all the time.
She finally divorced him when I was 19.
And now he married the younger girl that
he cheated on my mom with plus he just had
a son and he is 50. All I can say is good
luck hun
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Health Angel
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 14 Nov 2004 Posts: 141 Location: Australia
Posted: 01-18-05 01:35am
Goodluck saminsunisma. Guys who do that
arnt worth it. You deserve much better .
My dad also cheated on my mum when I was
young, its not something you want your
kids to grow up seeing happen.......I hope
everything works out.
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~*klo*~
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 19 Nov 2004 Posts: 353 Location: eng
Posted: 01-18-05 12:05pm
I dont know the story here, but my mum
cheated on my dad when I was 13. They
adventually devorced. Honistly just keep
strong, do it for your babies and your
self. Remember the best time of your life
and try to repeat that feeling over and
over, but make new memorys do not repeat
old ones. Gud luk hun
