Hello, I am only 15 almost 16 and I really
really want a baby. I know its crazy but
I do. I have had many scares about being
pregnant but now they arent even scares.
I pretty much raised my sister when I was
13 by myself and so I know I could handle
one. Its hard cause my boyfriend also
really wants a baby. Am I crazy for
wanting one? At times its easy to just
forget about it but at times its really
hard, its like I get baby fever. Does
anyone have any help for me? Thanks alot,
melissa
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kitty2luv
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Oct 2004 Posts: 1089 Location: with my love
Posted: 02-01-05 22:56pm
Trying to get preg hmm.. I would wait
being young and a mother isnt easy ! Just
ask some teen moms on here just think hard
bout it!
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cherriegurl
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Jul 2004 Posts: 1218 Location: Washington state
Posted: 02-01-05 22:57pm
Questions to ask ur self,
are u financially stable? Are u married?
Do you live on ur own? If u answered
no to any of these questions u probably
should not try to have a baby and to be
totally honest u should be protecting ur
self big time!
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Jocelyne
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Nov 2003 Posts: 121
Posted: 02-02-05 08:55am
I would really rethink your decision you
are young! You deserve to be young and
have fun. How old is your boyfriend???
He may say he wants a baby now but its not
uncommon for boys to bail when they
realize they don't want a baby after all.
Can you take care or a baby alone if he
changes his mind? Have you ever taken
care of a small child? A newborn who
cries constantly? Its not fun or a game
or something you can play with then put
away when you don't want it anymore. You
have so much to do why not wait a couple
of years then if you want a baby think
about it. Just because you think your
clocks ticking doesn't mean at the moment
you need a baby. This might sound funny
but why not get a puppy or something you
can baby its a good idea so that you can
give your love to something else before
crossing the boundary into motherhood.
Thats what I did i'm mom but to a
chihuahua. Lol. Have fun while you can!
Having a baby won't always be fun!
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SamiNSunisMa
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 27 Nov 2004 Posts: 1528
Posted: 02-02-05 09:02am
Okay, im sick of I raised myself or
siblings excuse. It's not the same. This
is harsh but go get a dog, they love too.
Sorry im in a bad bad mood. Why? Because
I have a 4 y/o who wont stay in bed. My
daughter has been in the hospital for 4
weeks now. And this is also stressing my
relationship with theeir father. Is this
what you want?
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a2ck418
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Sep 2004 Posts: 146
Posted: 02-02-05 09:10am
saminsunisma
wrote:
okay, im sick of I raised
myself or siblings excuse. It's not the
same. This is harsh but go get a dog,
they love too.
Sorry im in a bad bad mood. Why?
Because I have a 4 y/o who wont stay in
bed. My daughter has been in the
hospital for 4 weeks now. And this is
also stressing my relationship with theeir
father. Is this what you
want?
dianna kicking the caca out of me all
night until 5:45 this morning(when I got
up), I feel your frustrations to a degree.
Hope suni is getting bigger and stronger!
As for the poster, raising a sibiling is
easier, you are not finacially responsible
for them. Baby-sitting them is much
easier. Honestly how many times did you
have to run to your parents and say so and
so is doing this? Or when they go to the
doctors? Or school functions? Its alot
harder then you think! Just wait until
you are a little older sweetie!
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pinkbaby
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Dec 2004 Posts: 618 Location: Arizona
Posted: 02-02-05 14:20pm
The subject of your post kind of threw me
off...
"do I want one now?" one?...No comment on
that :roll:
i dont think you should try and "get one"
or "have one" just because you "want one"
...Try a puppy or something.
You should pm sacredxbluexeyes (i think
thats it) you seem like your in the same
situation, kinda?
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pinkbaby
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Dec 2004 Posts: 618 Location: Arizona
Posted: 02-02-05 14:24pm
I didnt intend for my post to be mean. Im
not trying to judge you or anything, so
dont come to me with that, saying "you
dont even know me!"
it just struck me the wrong way...
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bd1012
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 31 May 2004 Posts: 1998
Posted: 02-02-05 14:46pm
Don't do it..
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manytravels
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 16 Nov 2004 Posts: 159 Location: TN
Re Posted: 02-02-05 15:23pm
"basically raising" a brother or sister
isn't the same as having your own. Yeh I
know its redundent to say that, but there
is a reason we emphasize it so much. It
isnt the same.
I was 15 when I got pregnant with my
daughter and 16 when I had her. I was
married and me and my husband lived
together in our own place. I remember
some nights when she was a newborn I would
be so exhausted I would just hold her and
cry and sometimes I felt like a baby
myself and just wanted to go home to my
mom. Pregnancy isn't a walk in the park,
medical bills aren't a joy to sort
through, get behind in, and make dents in
your (or in your case most likely your
parents) bank account. Newborns aren't
all cute and cuddly all the time and
aren't cherubic little creatures to just
show off to your friends. Newborns get
bigger, and become toddlers who become
children who become teenagers who become
adults. My daughter is now 16 months old
and I won't lie, some days she makes me
want to pull my hair out.
Anyways, don't do it. Wait.
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BrianBaby
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 19 Jan 2005 Posts: 1383
Posted: 02-02-05 16:03pm
Who will pay for insurance for you and the
baby? Are you committed to the father,
or will he at least help and support you?
Do you have a car and a liscense to drive
yourself to Dr. Appt's and such? Will
you be relying on others to drive you
places? Will your mom and dad approve of
you having a child? Will you be relying
on them for full support?? Who will pay
for a crib, car seat, clothes, diapers,
etc...? Who will watch the baby when you
want to be alone or have other plans? Do
you have a job that will support the
child? Have you finished high school?
How will you finish high school? Do you
want to go to college? Do you want to
have a carrer? Do you have a house? Do
you pay for all of your food and such?
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vaughn6606
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 30 Jan 2005 Posts: 29 Location: missouri
Posted: 02-03-05 00:02am
Raising your sisters or brothers it waaay
different. Yeah my two older sisters
raised me, with their kids, one at which
had her first kid at 16, and my other
sister had her first at 21, I was barley
18. I moved out of my house when I was 15
to live with my sisters, because my mother
and I didnt get along. It was hard then,
I had to get a job, go to school then go
home to a house with my sisters and a
baby. And at night you wake up to crying
at all hours of the night. Dont get me
wrong, you will want a baby one day, I
didnt plan on gettin preg, when I did, and
I wouldnt give my baby girl up for
anything in the world. Sorry if I sound
like im being mean, but here it is, having
and being around babies is hard, sometimes
fun, most of the time tiring. You have to
have money all the time, diapers, food,
fourlma, clothes, Dr. Appt's. And you
have to have money for your self too.
Dont just take it from me, having a baby
at a younge age is hard.
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Kourtney08
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 08 May 2004 Posts: 937 Location: Alaska
Posted: 02-03-05 00:16am
Quote:
tr>
i pretty much
raised my sister when I was 13 by myself
and so I know I could handle
one.
oh you did? You bought her clothes,
diapers, wipes, formula, baby food, you
took her to her doctors appointments? I
doubt that.
Ask yourself this... Am I still living
with my mom and dad? Do I have a job? Do
I have a car to get to and from my
appointments?
Your parents took care of you, don't bring
a baby into this world that they didn't
plan, and they have to take care of.
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Ducky
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Oct 2004 Posts: 31 Location: foley
Posted: 02-04-05 18:51pm
Thanks everyone for your opinions, some I
took pretty offensively but others really
made me think. When I said I rasied my
sister pretty much by my self all I meant
was that I know I could handle one as in
knowing how to care for her, and stuff
like I didnt mean that I bought everything
for her. And yes there are 2 reasons that
stop me from goin to get pregnant. That
im not out of school yet and that I most
likely cant finacially take care of one
yet. But I have a question....Could it be
that im not fertal yet? Cause I have had
many times (by accident, breakage mostly
of the condom) that I thought forsurely I
would be pregnant. Thanks alot for
everyones help
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Ducky
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Oct 2004 Posts: 31 Location: foley
Posted: 02-04-05 18:51pm
Thanks everyone for your opinions, some I
took pretty offensively but others really
made me think. When I said I rasied my
sister pretty much by my self all I meant
was that I know I could handle one as in
knowing how to care for her, and stuff
like I didnt mean that I bought everything
for her. And yes there are 2 reasons that
stop me from goin to get pregnant. That
im not out of school yet and that I most
likely cant finacially take care of one
yet. But I have a question....Could it be
that im not fertal yet? Cause I have had
many times (by accident, breakage mostly
of the condom) that I thought forsurely I
would be pregnant. Thanks alot for
everyones help
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l2at24
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Nov 2004 Posts: 1509
Posted: 02-04-05 18:56pm
ducky
wrote:
thanks everyone for your
opinions, some I took pretty offensively
but others really made me think. When I
said I rasied my sister pretty much by my
self all I meant was that I know I could
handle one as in knowing how to care for
her, and stuff like I didnt mean that I
bought everything for her. And yes there
are 2 reasons that stop me from goin to
get pregnant. That im not out of school
yet and that I most likely cant finacially
take care of one yet. But I have a
question....Could it be that im not fertal
yet? Cause I have had many times (by
accident, breakage mostly of the condom)
that I thought forsurely I would be
pregnant. Thanks alot for everyones
help
no, I highly doubt your infertile.
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littlered
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 03 Jan 2005 Posts: 268
Posted: 02-04-05 20:25pm
I don't think that you are infertile. So
I wouldn't worry to much about that. I am
telling you just like everybody else. No
I don't have kids yet but I got plenty of
niece and newphs. I am not saying that it
is the same as raiseing a baby. But I
know how to change a daiper, fix a bottle
and put clothes on a baby. So basically I
know how to care for a baby. But I knew
to wait until I was ready to have baby
before I started trying for one. And I
also waited until I got married before I
started trying to have a baby. No it
didn't stop me from having sex. But I
waited for that until I knew I was ready.
So make sure that you are completely ready
to have a baby.
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pinkbaby
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Dec 2004 Posts: 618 Location: Arizona
Posted: 02-05-05 14:20pm
Sorry if you took my post offensively...
:(:(:(
look, I had unprotected sex for what... 3
years, and I never got pregnant, because I
thought "i couldent" (pretty stupid) it
took a long time, but guess what? I
did... Dont you ever watch maury? Some
young girls get pregnant on there first
time, and some married couples try for
years, its sad. So dont think you cant,
cause when your least expecting it, it
will happen.
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jessamyn
Moderator
Joined: 18 Aug 2004 Posts: 4101 Location: San Diego, CA
Thanks: 11
Thanked:3
Posted: 02-07-05 06:39am
Okay your gunna get offended by this one
too...
This is a child not a puppy! Yeah you can
handle babysitting your sister and looking
after her for you mom... But you probably
have no clue what it takes to raise a
child 24/7... I mean canyou even drive
yet? Your what a sophmore in
highschool... When I was a sophmore I
thought I was the caca that I knew
everything looking back on how much ive
grown up in just the past 2-3 years alone
is insane... Do you work? Could you even
work? I know in cali you have to be
atleast 16, when most places wont even
hire you till 18... Being pregnant alone
is expensive, the insurance, the doc
appts, the baby products... Your still a
child you dont need to have a child... I
know there are woman/girls who have had
babies while they were young and have
succeeded in doing an awesome job at
raising them... But trust me ask any of
them it was doing it hard!... Finish
school, grow up, fall in love get married,
then have a baby... Take your time hun...
And trust me even if you did get pregnant
its not like you have a baby the next day
its a whole other road from there... A
baby changes everything... A child and
baby doesnt stay a baby... Are you ready
to be a parent? You think your bf will be
there for you... Look up the averages on
how many young fathers stay with the
mothers... Think of whatyour parents
would say... Give yourself a chance
hun... I mean watch day time talk shows
for heavens sake look at all the paternity
testing going on there... Think of it
your young and I know the rumors alone
would kill you... Too many young mothers
give up on their children and their are
too many unwanted babies in this world...
Please please take your time and know it
is just a phase
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sftbllchika06
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 16 Dec 2004 Posts: 413 Location: St. Louis
Posted: 02-07-05 17:26pm
Think long and hard about it. You can't
make sure the father will always be with
you b/c you are a teens. I know I am 17
years old. The father is gone and now I
have a baby on the way that I will have to
take care of. You have your whole life
to have kids. Atleast wait til after
highschool I have quite a few friends who
have gotten pregnant and had kids. They
all have beautiful babies but if it wasn't
an accident their kids wouldn't be here.
I am happy about the fact I have a little
girl on the way but don't trap yourself
b/c you think it is a good decision now.
Also if you have to ask us if it the right
decision it probably isn't a good idea.