Back In the Saddle Or Not Posted: 10-31-03 11:30am
Having a problem maybe someone can help me
with. I'm a single mother of 3 and have
not been on the dating scene for quite
sometime. I met a great man and have
been spending time getting to know him and
just hanging out. I feel i'm physically
ready for an intimate relationship but
mentally I pull away from him. I also
start arguments just for him to leave. I
really like this man alot but is not quite
sure if i'm ready for any sexual contact.
My husband passed away quite some time
ago and I have not been intimate since
then. Can anyone help me with some
feedback.
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Suzy
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Sep 2003 Posts: 530
Posted: 11-01-03 00:06am
Hi odessa, i'm terribly sorry to hear
that you lost your husband. It really
does sound as though you are not ready to
commit to a relationship just yet. You
may still be grieving for your hubby.
Sometimes it takes years for someone to
move on after losing their partner.
Physically you may be ready, but
emotionally it is probably more difficult
to accept another man into your life. It
would be great if you could keep a close
friendship with this man until you are
ready to start a relationship, but at the
same time you will need to take his
emotional needs into consideration as
well. He may be ready to move into a
committed relationship now, and waiting
may not be something he is able to do.
You really need to be able to sit down
together and talk openly and honestly with
each other about what you both expect from
one another, once you have both talked and
it is out in the open, take both your
wants and needs into consideration and use
this information to make a decision on
whether or not it is possible to either
become a committed couple or keep it on a
friendship level. I sympathyse with your
situation and wish you lots of luck in
finding a solution.
