Aw sweetie.... You're not a bad mom, actually you are oding what's best for your little girl. Were you not getting any help??? Why don't you go stay with garry and his mum??? It's hard being a mum, especially when you're young... :hugs and kisses to you:

Having ppd must be difficult. I think you did the right thing letting your daughter stay with her father. You need to get treatment for ppd. If you aren't able to cope with things and if you have mood swings alot then you can't be the best mom you can be. You know I always hear people say that the best gift you can give your child is to take care of yourself. You need to be healthy so you can be the best mom you can be. You are not a bad mother. I'm sure everything will turn out great! Good luck!

Thanx lil. Garry said it will be better for jay and for me if I didnt have to worry about her for a little while, and could get some decent sleep for once.
But she's only 15 days old... If I cant cope after 15 days how am I going to cope with 18 years?

No, I dont get any help at home. Actualyl its worse than not getting any help.
Because not only do I have to put up with the mess that me and jay make, and the washing up and laundry and feeding.. I have to put up with all my nans crap that gets left around the house, and finish off her half "started" tasks.
Not only that, I barely have time to feed myself. And I expect her to at least make dinner for me once a day, at least all while im living here with her. But she dosent, so I end up going without food, which is probaly another reason why my milk is drying up rather fast.

I cant go and stay with garry and his mum, well I might be able to in 2 weeks, but garrys mum is having problems with her partner at the moment, and she's on the verge of kicking him out, and I think he's mentioned that he's leaving, but he's takign his son with him. Which garrys mum dosent realyl want. But she's wanted to get rid of her partner for years, just her guys kid hasnt been old enough for it to be fair on him.
So me beign there aswell, I would just get in the way.

My life seems so screwed to me right now!

I soooo hope that I get given a house/flat soon, because I know it will all be better when its just me garry and jay.

we have places here in quebec called clsc's that can offer help. I'm not too sure what they have in the uk but find out asap!!!!!! Get some help for everything!!! Thing's will be fine i'm sure of it.

Im under social services in the uk. And im getting all the outside help available.
The only thing I can do is wait until im offered a place, because emergancy housing, I cant say no to a place that id be offered, and the chances are they would place me outside the area where im living at the moment, which would be harder on me because I need all the help that garrys family can offer me right now.. Since my family isnt much help.

I mean I know there are more than likley people in a worse situation than me, but its hard for me to say to myself that its not all that bad, because I feel it is.

They have to house me legaly before jay is 3 months old, so only 2 and a half months to wait out at the most.

Hey max. I'm so sorry you're going through all that. I'm glad you're getting help now. I am also suffering with ppd and my daughter is 11 mos!!! I just went to the doc for it. I know how you're feeling. You're not a bad mother. I was 'bad' not getting help for months and just letting it get worse and worse. I hope you can use this little break from jay to get yourself back together. Take care. You can always talk to me if you want. *****big hugs*****

lana

I know post partum is a very serious thing but hun honestly you need that bond with her you need to be with her

I agree that they need to bond but really it would be better for jay to have her mummy back healthy and stable. What jays mummy has done is the most sensible thing the bond can be acheived even if mummy and jay live in seperate houses for the time being just like baby's in scbu.

Jays mummy you are very brave and I hope that you feel better soon

oh yes try getting in touch with your local mp or newspaper they usualy help to push the council and such good luck.

I think you are doing the right thing. You are putting your child over you.
And as for bonding... Do you think you could visit her, still?

Thankyou for all your positive replys. They have made me feel suprisingly better this morning.

Yes I can see jay when ever I want, what ever time of day I like. (i have my own key to garrys mums place)
im going to see her as soon as I get dressed and see if I can find some breakfast.

I just wish things wernt this hard. Why does having a baby make you feel liek this? I thought having a baby was spossed to be the best thing in the world for a mother.
To be able to look at the little person that "you" created, and was living inside you for nine months. Its the one miracle that women actualy do.

So why am I so depressed? I have the most beautiful baby girl that ive ever seen, and she's mine, because I made her.

(obviously we dont forget that the fathers little guys played a part in the creation of babies)

There are many, many reasons that a lot of us have a little ppd. Hormones, lack of sleep, body's still healing, there has just been a major change in your life for the rest of your life. And many more. You will get through this. And you are def doing the right thing. Jay will be better off with a refreshed momma. Take care girl.