Multiple Sclerosis Forum - Ms And Marriage

Hi to all. This seems to be a very helpful site and I am hoping to gain some wisdom out of it.

I have not officially been diagnosed with ms but with possible ms, although I may be at the start of a relapse, as I am feeling a slight tingling sensation at my fingertips and toes and on my right leg (that watery numby feeling). But more on this in another post. (if this indeed is a relapse then it would lead me to believe that it is ms).

A little background about me - I am male, 32 and come from a society where inabilities of people are looked down upon. Sad, I know, but what to do, some people are like that.

Recently I fell for a girl that liked me as well. I did not tell her that I might have ms as I did not know for sure whether I did, and I wanted us to get to know each other better before I prematurely say something that I shouldn't. Well, we live a great distance away from each other and communicate by phone, chat and sms (although for a brief period when we were together we were meeting and going out having dinners, etc.). Then she started saying that she's heard some things about me, and that it is quite bad and she can't tell me what it is. A relative of mine knew I had 'possible ms' and may have squealed.

She has now stopped all contact with me and has pretty much told me that it wont work out, but hasn't said why.

This is where I need your help, friends.

I am at the stage where I am accepting that it may not have worked out due to my condition (i think she is referring to my possible ms), but what is bothering me even further is that, with this condition of ms I don't know if i'll ever get married. I know it sounds silly and even heartless of me to say, but I feel that I am stuck in a rut about this. I do not personally know of anyone who has ms, and due to my community it is not easy for me to acknowledge openly that I have ms.

I know there are a great majority of people who have ms and are happily married, but from the majority of posts I have read on the forums, they have been diagnosed after getting married.

But what if you are not married, and have ms, and are hoping for someone to accept you as you are, and you can't easily admit that you have ms? Lets face it, it's more difficult finding a bride when you have any kind of health condition than when you don't, and ms is a widely un-understood (misunderstood?) condition.

Sometimes I feel that I may have to hide my condition and marry someone, but sooner or later it will be known to my partner that I have ms, and then the question will come up as to how long have I had it. Then my conscience will force me to tell the truth, and all **** could break loose.

I would like to think that I am opening my heart here for answers, and I am hoping I receive some. I would especially like to hear from those who have had to go through a similar dilemma or are in the same boat as me, but of course, all responses convey some level of wisdom.

Thanks friends.