It Has to End.....please Help! Posted: 03-21-05 19:43pm
Im a 37 yr old man and my partner is 30,
we met 4 yrs ago on the internet, she
lived in wales (uk) and I live in the
midlands (uk) 120 miles apart. I have a
daughter 13 yrs old from my previous
marrage who lives with me, my partner has
a son 10. She moved in with me 3 and half
years ago. Not long after we'd met she
kept pestering me about wanting another
child but I made it clear I didn't want
any and she told me she was on the pill,
just before she moved in with me she fell
pregnant. I must admit I think she did it
on purpose, however we now have a
beautiful little girl of 3 who I adore and
love with all my heart, she is so sweet.
The main problem is my partner is bone
idle, I work full time and pay for
everything, she sometimes buys food thats
all, she buys nothing for the house. Most
of the time she sits on the computer or
her sons playstation all day and does very
little around the house, the washing piles
up the ironing piles up etc and I end up
doing most of the house chores myself, she
is also constantly shouting and balling at
the kids which creates a terrible
atmosphere all the time. The last few
weeks she has not been getting on with my
eldest daughter and hasn't really spoken a
civil word to her she just ignores her,
and my daughter keeps out of the way
spending most of her time in her room
which i'm not happy about. Although it
will break my heart to not see my 3 yr old
daughter all the time I cannot live like
this. We have already decided that we are
going to split up and she has been put on
the housing list since this house has been
mine for 10 years and everything is in my
sole name . The last few days she refuses
to cook a meal for me refuses to wash or
iron any of my clothes even though she is
living in my house and using the entire
contents of it, all of which I have paid
for. Don't know how much longer I can
take this , the worst part of it all is
how she treats the kids, on at them all
the time! I'm not even allowed to have a
say with my3 yr old, she always has to be
the boss with her. I don't want to be
without my 3 yr old, I love her so dearly
but cannot carry on like this anymore.
Basically I need her out of my house, what
can I do? Sorry it was so long. Any help
woult be appreciated, thank you for
listening.
|
planka
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 28 May 2005 Posts: 2
Posted: 05-28-05 11:13am
If you think you can be a better parent
than your partner, then you could try to
ask to have a custody of your little girl
? You already have a bigger child so she
could help you.
Do you know why your ex-partner behaves
like that ? Is she depressed ? Does she
need help ? Was she traumatised ?
Maybe you can't help her but have you
tried ?
Hope that things will get better for all
of you.
How does the situation evolve ?
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subie90
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 31 May 2005 Posts: 19 Location: Louisville,Ky.
Posted: 05-31-05 18:51pm
Sounds like your partner wanted a free
ride from the beginning. Do you know
anything about her patterns from the past?
She was probably lazy and sloppy all
along and has always needed someone to
support her financially. She may have
become pregnant like you said, on purpose
just because she knew you would be
responsible and take care of things. Alot
of women with those traits do that kind of
thing. About your daughter, I would get
an attorney even if it is through public
aid if you cannot afford one , to see
about getting joint legal custody of her.
Then your partner will have to share your
daughter with you and will not have all
the control. My own brother went through
a similar situation so I know. Prayer can
also be very helpful for all of you. You
can always throw her out if you aren't
married and if she has no means to care
for the child she would have to stay with
you. Doesn't she have any family or
friends she can go to? Call a legal help
line, they can advise you on these kind of
things also. As far as doing everything
at home yourself, I just wouldn't do it.
I feel for you, I had an x husband who
wouldn't work or help me either. That was
the worst time in my life. I just thank
god we didn't have any kids. I will pray
for you. Good luck.
|
ashtyn2005
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 31 May 2005 Posts: 25
Posted: 05-31-05 19:03pm
I'd say just flat out tell her to leave.
Give her a time limit in which she has to
get out. And if she has not enough income
to support the children and is harsh
towards them, take her to court for
custody.
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MatrixDweller
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 15 Jul 2005 Posts: 3
I Hate the health forum Posted: 07-16-05 00:00am
My wife is the same way. I'm in a little
deeper though.
I think you should talk to a lawyer the
change the locks and pack up all of her
crap so she can get the health question
out of your life.
I wish I could do the same but we bought
the house together, we have two kids and
one on the way, and she's a mean biotch
who'd rake me over the coals. I'm just
going to have to be a gimp and like it.
|
MatrixDweller
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 15 Jul 2005 Posts: 3
I'm An problem And a Coward!!! Please Help Me!! Posted: 07-16-05 02:20am
Hi, this is the hated wife, who didn't
know I was hated until I caught my husband
writing this. I have been pregnant, and
feeling ill for the last four years. I
have had five of his children in the last
four years, and two died. He lost his
job on christmas eve, and unemployed for
six months, while I was a stay at home
mom. He then was offered two jobs, one
paying more than the other. He took the
lower paying job, and got fired a year
late. I was 8 months pregnant. Our
son almost died at a week old, and I went
back to work full time when he was 9 weeks
old, and now work part time. I am
pregnant again, and feel very ill most of
the time. I get home from work, and
fall asleep on the couch becaue I am so
tired and ill with this pregnancy. Nice
to know that I have a supportive husband
at home. I thought I did until now.
He doesn't have to worry about ending it.
I just did!!!!! He is out of here.
I have more respect for myself than to
stay with a man who secretly hates me and
wants out. Now he is the one crying,
and saying that he didn't mean it, but I
don't give a damn. He can leave, or I
will take the kids and leave myself.
