My Boyfriend Adimited to Me That He Binge Eats Posted: 04-09-05 19:08pm
Yesterday my boyfriend came home and told
me that he has an eating disorder and that
he wanted to stop. He said that everyday
before he goes to work he would stop at a
donut shop and buy a dozen donuts then eat
them all in the parking lot. I had no
idea whatsoever that he had been doing
this. He told me that he's been going to
the donut shop everyday for the past 3
months but that before he's binge ate just
not on such a regual basis. I can't
beilve I didn't know. He'd gained wieght
and I couldn't understand it because he
was eating just as much as I was when he
came home.
He said this was something he never wanted
to admit to anyone but yesterday he got
pushed over the edge and had to tell me.
He ran out of money on his bank card so he
asked if he could borrow mine to put gas
in his car. So he took out 20 dollars and
but then only put in 10 dollars so he
could go buy donuts with the rest. He
said he felt like he was stealing from me
and couldn't deal with it anymore. This
morning before he left for work he told me
he had the stong urge to go to get food
again but promised me he wasn't going
to.
I'm not really sure what to do to help
him. Should I tell him to leave his
wallet at home so he can't buy it? I told
him that he should go see a therapist to
get help but he told he that he's been to
one before a few years ago about his
depression and took medication and that it
didn't help. So he won't go see anyone
about it. He doen't want me to tell any
of his family about it because he's
sensitve about wieght issues. So i'm
alone to deal with this and help him.
What should I do?
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poetmcc
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 25 Mar 2005 Posts: 273
Posted: 04-09-05 20:52pm
Oh god, I know how hard it is to talk to
someone with an eating disorder. I've
never had to, but I have had people talk
to me about it. You boyfriend is probably
ashamed, frightened, lost and embarrassed
especially because of the stereotype that
only girls get eating disorders. Not
true. Try to help him but don't be angry
if he refuses to get help or acts
childish. Right now, he needs a friend,
someone to listen to, someone who doesn't
judge him because of his eating problem,
someone who loves him unconditionally.
Tell him you will give him that. Be
patient, I know what it feels to be in his
situation with an eating problem so I know
how I want people to talk to me. Just
talk for awhile, ask him what he wants to
do, what he wants for his life and let him
make some decisions. I'm not saying you
shouldn't take him to the dr, but like I
said, he probably will not want to. If he
is willing, that great. Keep me posted
and good luck.
