True Answers to Anything, From a Real Man Posted: 05-17-05 15:54pm
Ladies,
my name is jason and I have studied
sexual psychology, abnormal psychology,
marriage sexual relations, kama sutra,
tantric sex, human emotional theory,
practical sexual relation, sexual
dysfunctions, various hands-on teachings
and many many other aspects of the human
sexual experience. I have had many
partners (most experimental and all clean)
and am offering my expertise and
truthfulness. I will answer any
questions that you were too afraid,
embarrassed or didn't know how to ask that
special someone in your life. I can be
honest, straight forward, percise and kurt
about anything. Please post any
questions that you might have or pm me for
a discrete conversation. Feel free to
ask me anything...
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smile_of_aphrodite
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 May 2005 Posts: 4 Location: Louisiana
Question? Posted: 05-18-05 14:50pm
Since you have done all these studies, is
it normal for someone to want to be choked
during sex? I have never been abused in
any way, nor have I ever been into
anything like that. I have been sleeping
with someone for about 2 months now, he is
the only person I have ever had choke me.
What does this mean? Is it normal? Is
is safe? :?:
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worriedgf
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 May 2005 Posts: 3 Location: Cali.
Posted: 05-18-05 21:13pm
Since you have studied about sexual
dysfunctions, I need some advice or
information with a problem my bf is
having. We have been together for along
time and our sex life is great, but the
problem is that when we have sex he has ni
problem getting an erection and has no
problem performing, but when he is going
to cum he only gets the feeling of cumming
but nothing comes out. This just started
a few months ago. Can you give me any
idea what could be wrong?
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JasenG
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 May 2005 Posts: 99 Location: Virginia
Posted: 05-20-05 10:11am
worriedgf
wrote:
since you have studied about
sexual dysfunctions, I need some advice or
information with a problem my bf is
having. We have been together for along
time and our sex life is great, but the
problem is that when we have sex he has ni
problem getting an erection and has no
problem performing, but when he is going
to cum he only gets the feeling of cumming
but nothing comes out. This just
started a few months ago. Can you give
me any idea what could be
wrong?
the best way to help is to describe what
happens during ejaculation. An
ejaculation occurs when this fluid is
propelled out of the penis. This occurs
when there is a contraction of the
bulbocavernosus muscles, or more commonly
referred to as an orgasm. An orgasm is
the actual contraction of these muscles
expelling the fluid. It is possible to
have an orgasm without the expelling of
fluid. It is also possible to have the
fluid go backward into the bladder, which
is called a retrograde ejaculation.
This is most commonly seen in men who have
had prostate surgery or men who have had
surgery to damage the sympathetic nerves.
This may not be a cause for concern, but
to be safe I would schedule an appointment
with a urologist. They will run some
tests to see if there is nerve damage or a
possible blockage and "rerouting" to the
bladder. Make sure that he lists all
possible trauma to the area and any
occurances of pain durring sex or
urinating before going to see the
urologist. It can be un-nerving and he
might forget when put on the spot. Go
with him to his appointment if it will
help calm his nerves. Please let me
know how it goes.
Last edited by JasenG on 05-20-05 10:42am; edited 1 time in total
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JasenG
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 May 2005 Posts: 99 Location: Virginia
Re: Question? Posted: 05-20-05 10:38am
smile_of_aphrodite
wrote:
since you have done all
these studies, is it normal for someone to
want to be choked during sex? I have
never been abused in any way, nor have I
ever been into anything like that. I
have been sleeping with someone for about
2 months now, he is the only person I have
ever had choke me. What does this
mean? Is it normal? Is is safe?
:?:
what you are doing is called erotic
asphyxiation, or more commonly called
"breath control play." it is a sexual
activity that falls in the category of
paraphilia (read: kinky sexual acts),
which translates loosely to "erotic
attraction to activities on the edge."
there are many speculative explanations
for what causes a paraphilia, but not a
lot of agreement among professionals.
Some cite specific incidents or gradual
conditioning to alternative sexual
activities.
The physical pleasure occurs because
the brain's oxygen supply gets reduced.
This condition is called hypoxia and can
lead to a lucid semi-hallucinogenic state.
Couple that state with an orgasm and
some people find the sensation very
gripping (as i'm sure you do).
The problem is that there's no sure
way (or even a somewhat sure way) to know
when you are at the point of no return
from brain damage and death. The
potential for fatal accidents occurring is
always there with erotic asphyxiation and
great restraint must be taken to insure
that no accidents occour. Avoid having
him do this when he is near orgasm as he
may not let go due to his own muscle
spazms. The tracea is very fragile and
even if he lets go in time, it may be
damaged and airflow reduced.
The main point is to be cautious.
This can be a very rewarding act (i can
only assume since I have never tried it
myself) but just be very careful. The
pleasure that you may have derived from
strangulation during sex could be physical
or psychological or both. Each type of
pleasure can be quite compelling on its
own, but put them together and the
combination can create the motivation for
a dangerous habit. Have him read this
with you and discuss the limits together.
Create a "white flag" or some sorts.
Maybe an arm raise when enough is enough,
or try doing this in a position that
allows you to pull away if needed.
Just be careful and use common sense.
That extra few seconds at the end might be
a few too many! Good luck and enjoy.
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long viewer
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 May 2005 Posts: 17 Location: pa
Later In Life Posted: 05-22-05 16:22pm
My boyfriend and I have sex regularly, and
it is quite fantastic. I know that right
now he is at his sexual peak and he
constantly wants to have sex- but what
about later in life? I hear that men
lose a lot of interest in sex, but how
much... Would it go from like once a day
to once a week or what?
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trojanbaby
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 25 Dec 2004 Posts: 14
Posted: 05-22-05 19:35pm
So you have seen breasts of all sizes?
Which size is the best size for someone
petite
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trojanbaby
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 25 Dec 2004 Posts: 14
Posted: 05-22-05 19:38pm
Also how do men decide what is girlfriend
material and what is one night stand
material. I dont act slutty at all yet
all men seem to only want me for sex..
And if idont give it to them they lose
interest
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JasenG
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 May 2005 Posts: 99 Location: Virginia
Re: Later In Life Posted: 05-23-05 08:13am
long viewer
wrote:
my boyfriend and I have sex
regularly, and it is quite fantastic. I
know that right now he is at his sexual
peak and he constantly wants to have sex-
but what about later in life? I hear
that men lose a lot of interest in sex,
but how much... Would it go from like
once a day to once a week or
what?
women and men have different factors that
influence their desire. Men are usually
always on but their drive can be affected
by work stress, insecurity about the
future, or one of many other factors. We
as men never really lose interest in sex
(we can than god for that) but can put it
into the background of our mind. The
best way for you to not let his interest
fade is to keep it fresh. Even sex, if
always routine, can get boring. My wife
and I have been married for 3 years and
are both 23. We noticed a severe lack of
interest about six months ago and decided
to work on it. We bought a few books,
tried now positions, massages, etc and now
have a reinvigorate sex life. Just make
sure you can talk about it openly and be
up for new things.
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JasenG
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 May 2005 Posts: 99 Location: Virginia
Posted: 05-23-05 08:16am
trojanbaby
wrote:
so you have seen breasts of
all sizes? Which size is the best size
for someone
petite
interesting that you should ask. In
h.S. I dated a girl who was 17, 5'7",
110lbs, size 0 dress and a 'd' cup.
She was very top heavy. I have also
dated asian women that have little to
almost no breasts. The main factor is
not size, but proportion. While a size
0 and a 'd' cup might seem like the goal,
she was almost awquard looking, same way a
6'0", 180lbs woman would look with an 'a'
cup.
Let me know how "petite" you are and maybe
I can help better. The ideal
proportion (at least in my mind) would be
a size 'a-b' for dress sizes 0-4, 'b-c'
for 6-10 and 'c-d' for 12-up. That
keeps the porportions equal. Hope this
helped...
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JasenG
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 May 2005 Posts: 99 Location: Virginia
Posted: 05-23-05 08:28am
trojanbaby
wrote:
also how do men decide what
is girlfriend material and what is one
night stand material. I dont act slutty
at all yet all men seem to only want me
for sex.. And if idont give it to them
they lose
interest
haha lol... Men are inherently sexual
predators. Instead of stalking a gazelle
like a lion would, we are hunting our next
lay. As lions instinctively go for the
weak or old, men are more attracted to an
outfit that shows some skin, a provocative
dance, or even subtle touches or gestures.
Women, usually unknowingly, give off
certian vibes that our 'radar' will hone
in on when we are searching for an
enounter.
The best way to avoid these types of
advances is to not encourage them. Men
can take a simple flirt or even an act of
kindness as an advance on your part.
Unfortunately, men are stupid, and you
might not be able to avoid it. Learn to
let them know in advance that your actions
are not going to lead to a bedroom romp.
We actually respect a straight foward
woman and it should lead to a better night
with the sexual tension avoided.
Remeber, we men are controlled by our
little heads 90% of the time. Make your
intents know and you might actually have a
great time without the pressure of our
sexual expectations.
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Tamadrummer
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 15 Oct 2004 Posts: 710 Location: Zephyrhills,Fl
Re: Question? Posted: 05-23-05 10:25am
smile_of_aphrodite
wrote:
since you have done all
these studies, is it normal for someone to
want to be choked during sex? I have
never been abused in any way, nor have I
ever been into anything like that. I
have been sleeping with someone for about
2 months now, he is the only person I have
ever had choke me. What does this mean?
Is it normal? Is is safe?
:?:
i understand that jasen has given the
explaination in the terms of todays
society of "it is okay as long as you
don't bother someone else with it"
well this behavior is in no way healthy,
safe or recommended and if you die, your
family will in no way understand that this
was a sex act and your b/f will be placed
in jail for many years!
Think about what is happening and think
about the logic behind
"strangulation/choking" and then put
yourself in the picture and try to imagine
how your family will feel. Also imagine
how you will feel if your windpipe is
permanantly damaged but you live and have
to have a trache with an oxygen tube in
your neck/throat for the rest of your
life.
This makes no sense and you need to put a
stop to this as soon as possible. Don't
ever allow this weirdo ever choke you
again!!! Stop now.
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JasenG
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 May 2005 Posts: 99 Location: Virginia
Re: Question? Posted: 05-25-05 08:56am
tamadrummer
wrote:
smile_of_aphrodite
wrote:
since you have done all
these studies, is it normal for someone to
want to be choked during sex? I have
never been abused in any way, nor have I
ever been into anything like that. I
have been sleeping with someone for about
2 months now, he is the only person I have
ever had choke me. What does this
mean? Is it normal? Is is safe?
:?:
i understand that jasen has given the
explaination in the terms of todays
society of "it is okay as long as you
don't bother someone else with it"
well this behavior is in no way healthy,
safe or recommended and if you die, your
family will in no way understand that this
was a sex act and your b/f will be placed
in jail for many years!
Think about what is happening and think
about the logic behind
"strangulation/choking" and then put
yourself in the picture and try to imagine
how your family will feel. Also imagine
how you will feel if your windpipe is
permanently damaged but you live and have
to have a trachea with an oxygen tube in
your neck/throat for the rest of your
life.
This makes no sense and you need to put a
stop to this as soon as possible. Don't
ever allow this weirdo ever choke you
again!!! Stop
now.
tamadrummer,
you are wrong in your assumptions
from my post. I quote: the problem is
that there's no sure way (or even a
somewhat sure way) to know when you are at
the point of no return from brain damage
and death. The potential for fatal
accidents occurring is always there with
erotic asphyxiation and great restraint
must be taken to insure that no accidents
occur.
Where in this did you infer that I was
implying to "brush this aside?" I
implicitly stated the concerns and
dangers. I did, however, give the
medical reasons for the sense of pleasure
and try to explain what was really
happening. You and I are not sexual
police. All I did was give an unbiased
response. You should have done the same.
You are able to voice your own opinion
without attacking others. Reply to her,
not fight my reply.
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JasenG
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 May 2005 Posts: 99 Location: Virginia
Posted: 05-31-05 09:44am
Are there no more curious women that want
unbiased answers from a man? This thread
was going so well.
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JasenG
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 May 2005 Posts: 99 Location: Virginia
Posted: 06-10-05 09:25am
Everyone have a great weekend.
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vanessalouanne
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 31 May 2005 Posts: 2268 Location: ,
Thanks: 1
Thanked:0
Posted: 06-13-05 18:55pm
Can using a vibrator to reach an orgasim
later ruin your chances to reach one
without it??
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sandyallen
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Feb 2004 Posts: 4580
Posted: 06-13-05 20:35pm
This guy really sounds like a noodle head
or a wannabe sex therapist. Well said
tamadrummer, that person is sick. I
mean, I have an open mind on a lot of
things but, wholly-b-gollie.
Sincerely
sandy
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JasenG
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 May 2005 Posts: 99 Location: Virginia
Posted: 06-14-05 07:17am
vanessalouanne
wrote:
can using a vibrator to
reach an orgasim later ruin your chances
to reach one without
it??
vanessa,
I am not sure about it ruining future
chances, but I do know that most women are
not able to reach orgasm without clitoral
stimulation. My wife uses a small
vibrator to stimulate her clitoris during
intercourse and that is the only way that
she is able to achieve orgasm. It is not
because I am doing something wrong, or
because she has used on too much in the
past.
While most women find intercourse
extremely pleasurable, it alone provides
sensations that only very indirectly
stimulate the area of the clitoris. As
most men need direct stimulation to their
penis to reach orgasm, most women (about
70%) require direct clitoral stimulation
to reach orgasm. That's because the
clitoris and the penis are equivalent in
their capacity to receive sexual
stimulation. When most women use a
vibrator, they use it on the outside or
very near the entrance.
You might be asking yourself: did I
cause this dependence on my vibrator? Or
was something wrong with me to start with?
There's nothing "wrong" with getting
very accustomed to one particular path to
orgasm. Probably, you first learned to
reach orgasm with your vibrator and simply
got habituated to it. That does,
however, narrow the playing field for you
and a sexual partner -- for now, if you
want to reach orgasm the vibrator must be
in the picture.
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silver_tigress
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 15 Jun 2005 Posts: 15 Location: Australia
Strange Turn On Posted: 06-16-05 02:01am
I know this guy and there's something
really odd about him. I get the feeling
that he gets turned on by women of all
ages coming to him on health forums and
desperately seeking answers to their
sexual problems. :p
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JasenG
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 May 2005 Posts: 99 Location: Virginia
Re: Strange Turn On Posted: 06-16-05 08:15am
silver_tigress
wrote:
i know this guy and there's
something really odd about him. I get
the feeling that he gets turned on by
women of all ages coming to him on health
forums and desperately seeking answers to
their sexual problems.
:p
silver,
how do you know me? Some might
infer that there is a hidden motive,
possibly even arousal; however, I am just
a student of the sexual congress between
the sexes. I offer only unbiased advice
that is asked for. I do not presume to
judge or give my own opinions. I am
sorry if I come off as odd. My intent
was only to give women men's general
opinion and a clinical background on the
issue. Most women do not have an
anonymous man that they can ask these
deep, personal questions to without
embarrassment or fear of judgement. That
is why I started this thread, and
obviously a few have though it a good
idea.
