I know everyone is fighting this horrible
disease and you are all such an
inspiration but I am not like any of you.
I cannot fight anymore, i'm too tired and
very lonely. There is just so much
sadness in the world and it doesn't seem
to be getting any better. Over this past
week I lost a very close and special
friend and then another frind killed
himself only hours after I was with him.
I cannot live in a world where people hurt
so much and everyone dies. I refuse to
be apart of the hatred and pain that
people feel everyday.
I am not like any of you, I am not strong
and I can't make it though this. Today
we buried my friend and she was only 21, I
have never experinced such sadness and
numbness as this and its just too much, I
don't want to do it anymore.
I mightn't die tomorrow but I won't be
around for long, its just not what I want.
This world is too mad for me, I don't
understand why so many people hurt and so
little people are truely happy, its not
fair and its not right.
People make too many mistakes and as a
result others die, like my friend and I
cannot deal with it, not now, not anymore.
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ladymarmalade99
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 31 Jul 2004 Posts: 42
Posted: 05-25-05 16:46pm
I felt suicidal too sometimes. Remember:
your problems and troubles are temporary
but death is permanent!
You're just going through a rough time.
There was a time when I thought I would
never cure myself but it happened :)
good luck to you
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waterbaby3214
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 12 May 2005 Posts: 31 Location: Michigan
This Is the Final Time I'll Write This Posted: 05-25-05 17:10pm
For feck's sake,i have written this reply
about three times and I have managed to
delete it three times !! So here goes:
you cannot give up.You have to beat this
and I know that you can.And when you
do,you will become a wonderful counsellor
in marino and help people who are in
similar positions to you and i.Please do
not give up.Look how far you have come.And
you have ome far.I am not going to deny
that you had a sh*t week but don'tmake it
sh*tter by giving in.The world is a sad
sad place since it lost those two beatiful
people,and the five girls from navan.Can
you imagine how much sadder it would be if
you lost your battle too ? I have never
met you,ony emailed you and I love your
personality !! You have such a great
sense of humour and to be honest,it sends
a shiver down my spine to think that you
might not make.Please don't give in.You
are too brilliant to die from this.Think
of what you want to do in life.Travel,move
in with me(hehe),become a counsellor.Your
talents and the possibilities are
endless.Never ever doubt that you can beat
this.You are a beautifully,brilliant
person and i'll be so p*ssed at you if you
die and we never get to do yoga or our
volunteer work or move in.Please don't
give up.
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sandyallen
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Feb 2004 Posts: 4580
Posted: 05-25-05 18:15pm
Come on now! You are stronger then that!
You need to talk to a professional.
You need some help and there is nothing
wrong with that as we all need help
sometime in our lives, just go to mental
health and ask and I am not trying to say
that you are crazy.
Good luck!
Keep us posted, please!
Sincerely,
sandy
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lilo
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 May 2005 Posts: 21 Location: london
Please Have a Hope Posted: 05-26-05 03:25am
I have been in similar situation. My
family was in war situation and I had no
contact with any of them for 3 years.
Only news I would get is when someone got
injured and when someone died. But you
have to have a hope. Hope for the better
life. I remember when I was younger I did
so many silly things and wanted to end my
life- but I am soo grateful I am still
here so I can tell people about my lovely
once so they don't get forgotten. And
that is your purpose in life: to protect
yourself from the pain they have been
through and to tell people and children
about your friends inner beauty and
kindness- who will otherwise.
Life is amazing.
Give it a chance to feel it. You have to
be open for it.
You see how this is affected you- with you
feeling bad it would affect even many
more. Please be strong and give life a
chance. You have to. Everyone deserves
it.
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damsel
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 May 2005 Posts: 69 Location: Melbourne, Australia
Be Strong! :) Posted: 05-26-05 09:06am
I don't know if this will help, but i'm
going to post the lyrics of one of my
favorite singers delta goodrems songs and
maybe it will make sense to you, because
we are all here for you, even if that
doens't mean much now. I am no stronger
than you, no one is, it just takes time I
guess.
'be strong'
are you swimming upstream in oceans of
blue?
Do you feel like your sinking?
Are you sick of the rain after all you've
been through?
Well I know what you're thinking
when you can't take it
you can make it
sometime soon I know you'll see
'cause when your in you're darkest hour
and all of the light just fades away
when you're like a single flower whose
colours have turned to shades of gray
well hang on and be strong
where taking each step one day at a time
you can't loose your spirit
let live and let live forget and forgive
it's all how you see it
and just remember keep it together
don't you know you're never alone
'cause when you're in your darkest hour
and all of the light just fades away
when you're like a single flower whose
colours have turned to shades of gray
well hang on, and be strong
no you're not defeated
and soon you'll be smiling once again
then you won't have to feel it
let it go with the wind
time passes us by
and know that you're aloud to cry
'cause when you're in your darkest hour
and all of the light just fades away
when you're like a single flower whose
colours have turned to shades of gray
well hang on and be strong
