Today I have really been trying. As I
mentioned earlier I have no problems
during the day with binge eating and
throwing up. I am really good at work and
I do eat normal. But I just transform to
some kind of monster on my way back home.
I was sooo good today and I really though
I could make it...But I have just spent
whole night just eating and eating and I
just can't take it anymore. It is so
painful and nothing works. How do I
stop!! It is my only hobby, my only life
after work is to stuff my face with
disgusting stuff and throw up and do the
same again for hours and hours. Why!?? I
have absolutely no control over it. I
hate it and I really don't want to damage
myself anymore. I really love who I am
and I love my looks...But I just can't
stop this.
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sandyallen
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Feb 2004 Posts: 4580
Posted: 05-26-05 17:19pm
This is something that most people cannot
handle on their own. O.K., you admitted
that you have a problem, that is the 1st
step now for the next step is to get help
and there is help out there. I do not
knowwhere you are frm but there is help
everywhere you go and with pretty much
every problem you might have and I am sure
that it is not too late for you. Contact
mental health and no, I am not trying to
say that you are crazy, you just have a
nasty disease that you need help with and
you need to do this a.S.A.P.
Sincerely,
sandy
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poetmcc
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 25 Mar 2005 Posts: 273
Posted: 05-27-05 12:02pm
Hey lilo, I am sorry to hear you are going
through such a rough time right now. You
know, I am goin gthrough some of the same
things you are. As soona s I get home
from school, I just eat and throw up, I
feel like I am disgusting...You are right
it is very painful and uncontrollable like
you said.
I wish there was some way I could help
you, but I can't because I am suffering
just like you are. Please pm if me if you
want to talk.
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waterbaby3214
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 12 May 2005 Posts: 31 Location: Michigan
Take That Step Posted: 05-27-05 13:08pm
Hey lilo.Hope all's good.At the moment I
am going through the same sh*t as you.I'm
praying that one day I will wake up and
somehow find the strength to beat this.For
the past four weeks I have been on a non
stop binge.I feel and look terrible,i've
put on weight and my confidence is at an
all time low.I'm supposed to be studying
for really big exams and at the moment i'm
not too sure if i'm going to pass them.
Anyway that's enough of my moaning ! You
have the strength to beat this.It is just
buried at the moment but believe me it is
there.It's bad now but it can get
better.It's just a series of little steps
which will one day add up to one giant
step and you won't even realise how far
you have come !Are you seeing a counsellor
? It may be a good idea to do that.They
are never shocked by what they hear and
they are there to listen and to help
you.I'm kinda waffling now so i'll leave
you with a thought that my counsellor
always says to me :
a journey of a thousands miles starts with
a single step.
