Hi I hope everybody is doing ok.I was just
wondering,does anybody else who suffers
from bulimia find themselves experiencing
terrible mood swings ? I can be ok for
the whole morning but suddenly if I think
about binging or how much weight I need to
lose I just sink into this really bad mood
and the only thing that will temporarily
release me from that mood is a binge.But
after I binge I feel even sh*tter so
really i'm just making myself worse and
although I know this,it does not stop me
from binging and purging.I have very few
people that know about this and only two
people that I talk to about this and even
then I don't tell them much.I feel very
alone and yet it is me that is pushing
people that want to help me away.So I was
just wondering if anyone goes through the
same thing or am I just a freak ?! Tell
me honestly !!!!
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BrokenButterfly
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Jun 2005 Posts: 28 Location: Ireland
Posted: 06-29-05 18:16pm
Of course your not a freak, I understand
exactly what you mean, its like its a
catch 22. Perhaps you could ask yourself
why do you feel the need to lose weight on
some days and not so much on other days?
Could it be that its when you are thinking
alot and consumed by alot of things that
you feel you need to lose weight?
I know on the surface its about food and
weight but it goes alot deeper then that
and I think that its more got to do with
how you feel about yourself or a certain
situation that can cause your mood to go
up and down so much.
Perhaps you could try to focus more on
what is happening at that time or what are
you thinking about at that time( other
than food) when you want to binge or feel
down. Maybe it would be better if you
focused more on whats going on in that
moment that gets you down.
I hope i'm making sense here but I really
think that there is so much more to it
then wanting to lose weight because
although you asked people who are bulimic
about their moods,there is no big
difference between people who are anorexic
or bulimic because its the same
destructive thinking and feeling behind
the food.
But you are not mad or a freak, you are
just going through something which is very
difficult but you will get there, you will
recover,i know it.
I hope your mood is ok now, there are
people that are there for you, there
always will be but you have to take there
hand and let them lead you along the right
path.
The best of luck to you and write anytime
you need to talk.
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bianca
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Jul 2005 Posts: 7 Location: Toronto
Posted: 07-29-05 23:58pm
I feel exactly the way you do. My bulimia
goes like hand in hand with mood swings.
Like today I just got picked up from work
and I felt shitty for eating some licorice
candy in my store(i work at a candy store
*ughhh * aha) that the second my dad was
like 'why are you wearing your glasses'
all I could think was angryangryangry I
have to barf now but by the time I go home
the calories will have been absorbed so I
was just like what why cant I wear my
glasses whats wrong with them why are you
so annoying and I just kept going on in
such a cold tone. I was being selfish
that I couldnt get my way and took it out
on him. And then ill be like thinking
while binging that hey im gonna barf it up
so I might as well eat more so that next
time I wont feel tempted to eat that thing
but it never works out... Lol
