I've Been Seeing Things, Help Posted: 07-06-05 16:01pm
All right, i'll get right down to it.
What i'm asking for is possibly some.. I
don't know, insight? I'm definately not
asking for a diagnosis, just maybe a
little "yeah, it kinda sounds like it" or
a "no, don't worry."
the other night I was fighting with
my girlfriend, we were just sitting on the
floor and I saw a figure sitting on the
couch next to us. When I would turn my
head to see he wouldn't be there anymore,
so I thought nothing was going on and just
looked back at her. I peered over a
couple times to make sure and then forgot
about it. A few minutes later I saw the
figure again, just sitting there and I
felt a presence and started to freak out.
I yelled in broken speech, cried, and
didn't know what was going on.
A couple nights later I was in
bed and talking to her, we were sitting up
on opposite sides, facing each other.
She moved her head down and as that
happened I saw a door in the wall open and
dissappear. And just today I was on hold
on the phone lying down and heard this
weird wooshing sound that sounded a little
like a nervous, quivery laugh.
Is this anything to worry
about? Please help me.
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hunkirg
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Jul 2005 Posts: 50 Location: manitoba
Posted: 07-09-05 00:49am
This may sound silly but, do you sometimes
like me, try to figure out what has
happened in past conversations with
people?
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Miles
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Jul 2005 Posts: 11 Location: Somewhere
Posted: 07-10-05 22:31pm
Constantly. Sometimes I forget the
meaning of words, what I did two nights
ago, what i've said, etc. I mean, i've
come to a horrible alcohol problem in the
past year, which probably contributes to
it, but it's not just under the influence.
It happens all the time. I also have
extreme mood swings, not rapid or
anything, but just one extreme or the
other.
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hunkirg
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Jul 2005 Posts: 50 Location: manitoba
It Is Ok Posted: 07-10-05 23:41pm
Miles, do you find that when you do go
over those things that it always seems
like either everyone is mean, or that
everyone is blaming you for what seems
like thier mistakes?
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Miles
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Jul 2005 Posts: 11 Location: Somewhere
Posted: 07-11-05 08:31am
Yes, but I have a temper and can say
really mean things, so I always end up
apologizing.
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hunkirg
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Jul 2005 Posts: 50 Location: manitoba
Posted: 07-11-05 17:13pm
Miles I believe you do have schizophrenia,
the good news is it really is not what
they say it is here. It is 100% curable,
and it does not require hospitalization or
medicine.
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Miles
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Jul 2005 Posts: 11 Location: Somewhere
Posted: 07-12-05 08:48am
I don't know how much I believe one
opinion from two questions, I have so many
other symptoms that could attribute to
other conditions. I'd at least like a
second or third opinion, or some links
that explain you're correct in telling me
i'm schizophrenic. You could e-mail me--
sp
ainish_pirate@yahoo.Com
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hunkirg
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Jul 2005 Posts: 50 Location: manitoba
Posted: 07-12-05 10:51am
Hi, hope you got my e-mail with theory.
When you say that you say mean things , is
that your intent or is that how others say
it comes across ? Often times if others
misunderstand and respond to you in a
negative way that is logically "twisted"
it is because their is a misunderstanding
and people will try to create plausable
explanations by using an excuse (saying
you are the mean one, or you are drunk)
even if it is not a fact, to protect their
own "social value". This is where we
"normals" do use a "twisted logic" of
implied meanings which a linear thinking
schizophrenic brain does not understand
the social meaning with out a truthfull
(will correspond with real experience)
explanation of the "social meanings"
"normal" people infer &imply.The
schizophrenic brain when unable to
continue to cope under stress (it will be
when their is misunderstanding with a
"normal" person that unable to pick up
outside cues that are meaningful in
explaining the brain begins to look for
internal cues. This is when a
schizophrenic will believe that thier
blinking (one or two), or other physical
stimuli means yes or no, or truth or lie.
When this fails to create rules of logic
that correspond with reality (real world
experience), the schizophrenic brain has
only one option. To create a reality that
matches personal perception of experience.
The thalamus begins to atrophy as the
brain switches from logical (coresponds
with "real"world stimuli) left brain
thinking, to fantasy right brain thinking.
As the thalamus sends less external
input to the brain the schizophrenics
experience becomes increasingly made of
right brain fantasy, which is also where
dreams are created. That is why
schizophrenics as they get older have more
difficulty discerning dreams from reality.
This continues until the mind is "seeing
reality" as it is emotionally experiencing
it. Does that sound like the course the
"illness" has run?
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Miles
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Jul 2005 Posts: 11 Location: Somewhere
Posted: 07-13-05 12:43pm
Before I start, I don't think i've
mentioned this, but i'm only 17. And the
saying mean things part, it's kind of hard
to put in a black and white opinion.
Sometimes i'm just being emotional,
sometimes I say things out of anger, and
at the time I don't really realize i'm
being mean but when they cry or tell me
what I said later I feel bad.
It does sound similar, maybe to a smaller
degree. What I gathered from it is that
I don't understand all the implied social
meanings that come up between people in
interraction, which could very well be
true. I do occasionally have trouble
discerning dreams from reality, but it's
not immediately after it happens, it's
more remembering it (i.E. I'll look back
and won't remember the difference,
thinking that it could be either, and
either dismiss it or choose which it seems
more like, I could be labeling the
memories and the dreams completely wrong.)
I do have logical explanations that
people can't follow, especially when i'm
trying to explain something--and I do find
that it gets worse when i'm under stress,
especially being put under stress because
I can't get someone to understand
something. I'd much like you to explain
more on the internal cues and external
cues, plus the"this is when a
schizophrenic will believe that thier
blinking (one or two), or other physical
stimuli means yes or no, or truth or lie,"
I didn't quite understand that. I could
research it if you don't want to explain,
it just seemed easier to ask.
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hunkirg
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Jul 2005 Posts: 50 Location: manitoba
Posted: 07-13-05 13:43pm
Miles, I would be happy to help. What
happens is as other people get older they
take the start talking with "social
graces". It is a way normal people talk
because we have all been taught to "be
good", yet because all people also have a
personal interest (what would benifit them
most), they will with those "social
graces" mask their intent in a way that
they will make it souind like they are
doing you a favor, or if they have
mistreated you they will either deny it,
or give a reason why (sometimes truth,
sometimes not). Other people understand
they are making excuses, but will act as
if it is what happened, that is not to be
mean but like everyone, we all have
trouble admitting our faults, because we
want people to like us. Other normal
people recognize the decietfull speech, or
action, but they recognize they do it
themselves, so act as if they believe,
they understnd by doing that other people
will allow them to do that (as long as its
not to "far fetched"). The schizophrenic
really is a person who does not understand
the deciet going on, and why. That is
what makes the world seem so cold, and
negative, right now for you. You have
had a lot of negative experiences, but
because other people say "they didn't mean
that" , you have begun to feel it must be
your fault, it is not with some simple
explanations that are honest, you will
understand, and when you understand, your
mind won't have to create things to
exploain why it's so bad and you won't
feel bad about yourself. When you are
under stress and those things start
happening, what are you thinking about?
That is where you are missing a rule of
logic to understand. If you don't feel
you can ask anyone, start asking me.
Explain where you are having problems as
honestly as you can from your perspective,
and I will give you the logical
understanding you need to understand. If
I explain things in to complicated of a
way, tell me and I will try a different
way until you feel you really understand.
I want to help, and that is the only
thing that will help. The problem really
is not with you, it is that these things
just arn't explained. Hang in thier and
one little piece of logic at a time you
will see that life will make sense, and it
does not have to be more than picking up a
few rules of logic now.
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Miles
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Jul 2005 Posts: 11 Location: Somewhere
Posted: 07-13-05 14:22pm
I don't know, I never really came to a
conclusion on whether I wanted to stop
this or let things run their course. I
don't see the glory in being false and
deceitful, and i'm almost glad I don't
understand it much, though that can be a
disadvantage. I enjoy having a different
thought pattern, I enjoy seeming abstract,
i'm just trying to weigh out the pros and
cons. And i'm still not sure i'm even
schizophrenic, it's hard to come to terms
with. You describe it as something
pretty close to me, but there are posts on
this board that are titled "i saw a child
at the end of my bed" and have to do with
seeing your aborted baby crawl around the
room, and people saying they would have no
regrets killing someone, just a sorry
feeling.
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hunkirg
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Jul 2005 Posts: 50 Location: manitoba
Posted: 07-13-05 14:44pm
You arn't thier now, but miles that is
schizophrenia, and that is where it will
end up. It is not a choice, if your mind
doesnt decipher what is really happening
then it is smart and creative enough to
"create" a reality that will match how you
feel, and although it my build you up for
a while it will end in a bad place. It
is about understandig the way other people
are behaving for your well being. Still
be the same smart creative person, still
feel the same way bout that decietfull
behaviour that is who you are and that is
who you should be, but no one can see
those qualities if you slip further into
fantasy left brain thinking, you wont be
able to express it in a way that will be
understood. That is when society will go
from saying your unique to your "crazy",
which I dont believe for a minute. I am
involved in theoreticl physics and I will
be honest, I don't like most other normal
people because I think they waste thier
time & energy with social games, but I
understand the rules of how it is done so
when I need to interact I know I am being
understood as I intend, and I am hearing
the message they intend for me. That is
what will allow you to have a meaningfull
life.
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Miles
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Jul 2005 Posts: 11 Location: Somewhere
Posted: 07-14-05 09:18am
Okay, thank you for all of your help,
especially offering to help me further by
listening and talking about problems of
understanding I could be having. I have
your e-mail, if you have an aim screen
name that would be more ideal. Are you
schizophrenic, or do you just understand
schizophrenics very well? You mentioned
yourself in relation to the questions you
were asking me, but I know some people do
that to make others more comfortable.
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hunkirg
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Jul 2005 Posts: 50 Location: manitoba
Posted: 07-14-05 11:59am
Yeah, feel free any time you need to talk
or something is up. I am a very logical
thinker, and I really do understand that
people really do talk in ways where what
they are meaning does not match what their
words say. Recently (in may) my partner
was diagnosed with schizophrenia. I do
theoretical physics, but our life has
become this. She was put on medication,
no proffesional understood, so she really
started opening up. I just applied
scientific logic and it seemed very clear
what the problem was. I have been
spending most time developing real world
logic, that has helped her. When on meds
she still had delusions, because her brain
had no logical way of accepting what was
real. She has been of meds and is doing
much better than before. In learning
about how difficult it has been for her to
carry that for years afraid to tell.
This is something that their is real help
for and afflicted people need the real
help society sys it wnts to give. Peace.
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hunkirg
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Jul 2005 Posts: 50 Location: manitoba
Posted: 07-14-05 18:11pm
A quick ps, that was insightfull, the
observation that people do sometimes make
stuff up to help someone open up. That
is one of those social tools people use.
Honestly though miles, I really do
understand though the way we use language
as if it did not have definite meaning,
and for people who use definite meanings,
like a schizophrenic, or a scientist, it
can be hard to see what they are really
saying, and that is why I told you I to
think people can speak in ways that can be
misunderstood.
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JoshGSchizophreniaNIN
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Aug 2005 Posts: 13 Location: Henderson, NV
I Kinda Disagree Posted: 08-05-05 04:14am
Hunkrig,
how can you say miles has schizophrenia?
You seem to be 100% certain, but have you
met him in person? Maybe your "partner"
has sz, but that does not necessarily mean
you can tell if someone has it the way
have here.
Also, are you sure there is a cure? I
thought I read there really isn't and that
they are still researching the causes.
Miles,
in my opinion, you simply do not have
schizophrenia. But that is my opinion.
If you seriously think you are mentally
ill, then I advise you do seek a
therapist.
I believe you mentioned something about
drinking alcohol? Well, maybe you just
have an alcohol problem. Not
schizophrenia.
Judging from just your posts (from what
little I know), there's just no way.
Schizophrenia is not just about
delusions/halluciations. There a lot of
good web sites that enforce this!
for instance, social isolation is a common
feature associated with schizophrenia.
You mentioned you have a girlfriend? And
that you get in verbal arguments and stuff
with her? This all purely normal. You
have a social life. Schizophrenics, I
think, are typically isolated and socially
withdrawn. To the point of probably
having "no life" so to speak.
Schizophrenics are typically withdrawn
emotionally and have difficulty with
everyday conversations.
I just want to help you out here.
Because I have recently been diagnosed
with schizophrenia by qualified doctors.
I have also read a little about it. All
in all, I don't think you have
schizophrenia.
Also, be aware of how severe schizophrenia
can be and normally is. It is not like a
minor personality disorder.
Josh
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Miles
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Jul 2005 Posts: 11 Location: Somewhere
Posted: 08-10-05 17:10pm
I do have an alcohol problem - but that
has to do with my problem with addiction
in general, not me drinking and thinking
i'm seeing things. I only really listed
the hallucinations because they seemed
like the biggest cause of concern, i'd
been reading about schizotypic personality
traits recently and it described me
accurately.
I really do have a problem socializing,
when I was 13 I shut myself in my room for
a good couple years and no one would talk
to me at school. I didn't have any
friends because I couldn't figure out how
to socialize. I talked to a girl on the
internet and it helped me a lot to learn
to make people laugh, and I took babysteps
until in two to three years I had a pretty
stable social life. I still have a lot
of trouble talking to people and I still
have extreme mood swings and occasional
anti-social tendencies. A lot of social
problems have gone away, i'm not scared of
people any more, I have confidence.
Other things come up though, more severe
mental problems.
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yfguitarist
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Apr 2005 Posts: 44
Posted: 08-10-05 20:18pm
hunkirg
wrote:
this may sound silly but, do
you sometimes like me, try to figure out
what has happened in past conversations
with people?
yes! I do that all the time! I don't
know if there's anything wrong with me,
though.
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sandyallen
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Feb 2004 Posts: 4580
Posted: 08-10-05 21:52pm
Hi there! You are not a Dr., so please
do not diagnose, you haven't even met the
person.
Miles, you need to see a professional.
People that drink do have hallucinations,
regular people, drs., all sorts of people
have drinking problems, maybe if you go to
aa or mental health they can start you in
the right direction and please do not get
me wrong, I am not saying you are crazy,
it is just that we all need a little help
in our lives sometimes and maybe that
sometimes is now for you, before it gets
worse.
Good luck to you and keep us posted on
what you find out.
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Miles
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Jul 2005 Posts: 11 Location: Somewhere
Posted: 08-11-05 13:21pm
Can we please stop focusing on the
drinking problem? I used to drink every
night, now it's strictly social and has
been for nearly a month. That's not the
problem I wanted help with, I have will
power, I just like drinking and smoking a
lot. I don't believe in aa and I don't
believe the people in aa are happy,
they're always going to want to get drunk
and they're always going to feel deprived
for not drinking. I don't want help if I
have a problem. I just wanted to know if
it sounded like a problem, maybe early
stages of schizophrenia.