Advice For a Broken Heart Posted: 07-13-05 15:10pm
Hello,
I am 26 and my now ex gf is 24. We
have been going out for a year and 7
months. We did share a shore house with
a bunch of her friends and a few freinds
of theirs. At the bar this past weekend
she broke up with me. Everything was
fine and I was dancing and I noticed that
a guy bought her a drink and she seemed to
smile when he did. I have seen this
before because my gf was a flirt and
outgoing, I always ignored it because she
always came home with me. She had never
cheated on me. I was just having fun
dancing and she came over with a pout on
her face, I asked her if she would liek to
dance and she declined and said that we
need to talk. We went outside the bar
ad she said she needs time for herself
right now.
She wanted o go back inside immediatly,
but I thought we would leave and talk some
more. I waited at the front but she
did't show up. When I went to where she
was she was crying with some friends but
managed a smile when that guy quickly said
something in her ear.
I told her that I was drunk and didnt know
how to get back she said to take a cab.
I then took a cab back to the shore house
and preceeded to drive 2 hours back to my
house, she did not call and I called and
she had went to another bar.
Anyway the next morning I got up early and
drove back down to see if it is all for
real, it was.
She said that she was scared that we were
to serious, she wants to be single, she is
only 24. Most importantly she said that
it wasnt the same and she needs time to be
by herself and think.
Well I was completely shocked by this and
I am devastated. It came out of no where
and she was very callous to do it like
that at a bar.
She says she has lsot feeling and that a
break is needed to think things through.
Well this was 5 days ago and I am still
shocked, depressed.
Not only did she break up with me but
ruined my summer, I would not want to go
back there.
I really treated her like gold, and took
care of here after she has double hip
replacement surgery. I would see her all
the time.
Is this relationship over?
When someone says they need time, do they
ever come back.
Another thing to mention is one freind is
single and the gf and her are bfs. I
think she pressures her to be single so
they can pick up guys together.
All other friend in the house adore me and
have written me nice lettters saying to
give her time and she will hopefully come
to her senses.
|
KrissyGirl
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 Jul 2005 Posts: 2
I'm Sorry Posted: 07-13-05 15:27pm
Hi paragon-
i'm sorry to hear what happened. These
are never easy situations! I think you
hit it on point when you said all of her
friends are single. I've had this happen
so many times , my girlfriends will be
single and i'll have a bf and they make me
feel bad for not being the same person and
being "married". It can take its toll on
a person. Her gals were probably putting
a little pressure on her and then she
started to stress out and overanalyze
everything.
The best advice I can give is to give her
the space she needs and hopefully she will
come around. That is the hardest part,
but what other choice do you have?
Please don't let it ruin your summer. I
know that its only been 5 days so you
will probably be sad for a while yet, just
try to keep yourself busy by hanging wtih
friends, working, gym time... Ect.
If you really love her and believe shes'
the one...Wait it out, she'll come to her
senses on day.
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Paragon
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 Jul 2005 Posts: 2 Location: New Jersey
Posted: 07-13-05 15:36pm
Thanks krissy girl,
I really do love her and do hope she
comes to her senses. Till then I think it
will take some time to get over her. It
is tough at night and I have been trying
to set other things up with my friends.
I just worry that she will be going crazy
down the shore with other guys, etc.
Especially when I gave so much to this
relationship.
Thanks for the advice
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Jordan H
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Jun 2005 Posts: 74 Location: Calgary, AB, Canada
Posted: 07-13-05 17:18pm
The exact same thing happened to me quite
a few years back, by then boyfriend just
came up to me one day and told me that he
thought that we should take a break. It
totally tore me up inside, I just didn't
know what way was up. I was totally
confused, but I gave him the time that he
had asked for. We were separated for
about 2 weeks before I got the phone call
telling me that he was sorry, and couldn't
live without me. That was 9 years ago,
and now we are happily married, and trying
for our first baby. It turned out that he
was also pressured by his friends to break
up with me.
Just give her the space that she desires,
and have faith in her, some stories do
have a happy ending. :wink:
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Badhlth
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 27 Aug 2006 Posts: 8
Posted: 08-27-06 13:31pm
Im only 18, but I had a gf of 4 years
leave me over money... I know how you
feel man, but i've found me someone else,
if she left you for that guy then she isnt
worth it, get away, talk to other people,
and wither wait it out of find someone
new, I suggest finding someone new, it
worked wonders for me
|
mostly_afraid
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 26 Jun 2006 Posts: 16
Posted: 08-29-06 13:54pm
badhlth
wrote:
im only 18, but I had a gf
of 4 years leave me over money... I know
how you feel man, but i've found me
someone else, if she left you for that guy
then she isnt worth it, get away, talk to
other people, and wither wait it out of
find someone new, I suggest finding
someone new, it worked wonders for
me
i agree with you more than everyone else's
advice to give her time. I think that if
the girl broke up with you, then you
should definitely consider yourself
totally single. Try and meet lots of new
people and pray for your broken heart to
heal. In time, if you and your ex are
still both single and decide to get back
together, then fine, but for the time
being, to hell with her. She's not into
you anymore. That's the cold hard truth.
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sandyallen
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Feb 2004 Posts: 4580
Posted: 08-29-06 14:58pm
Give her her space but remember, you have
a life too and you might meet meet someone
that will treat you with more respect!
Good luck!
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pauly boy
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 28 Aug 2006 Posts: 85 Location: florida
Let It Go Bro... Posted: 08-29-06 15:06pm
Big world,.Lots of caca happens,youll be
ok.
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Badhlth
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 27 Aug 2006 Posts: 8
Posted: 09-02-06 12:48pm
Indeed, mostly_afriad, it took me forever
to get over her. I bet ifyou found out
your ex has screwed 4 guys in the last
week youd turn off of her quick... Oh
well, like I said, just look around, if
you and her work out, thats great, if it
dosent move on, it can be more rewarding,
I now have a woman who is 10x better than
my ex
