Addiction, Recovery Forum

Ok, listen 2 me, I know exactly how, you feel, before you skip what I have 2 say, I am in your shoes but I can help you. I know it feels good 2 talk 2 someone that has the same problems so hear it goes.

I am a 18 year old boy who has been manicly depressed sense I was 12. Ive been around many hard days, and believe me, they were bad. My girlfriend used 2 cut herself b4 she knew I existed (i never did, because I always saw it as the vagina way out and I can build up the courage 2 not do it). Instead of hurting myself, I would deal with my pain by taking pills (that were perscribed 2 me), smoking, or drinkin. Even though my pain would go away for that night, it would always come back.

Another problem that I have is anxiety, you know how your heart pounded uncontrolably? Well that happends 2 me when I smoke. My body shakes, everything is louder than it should be. And every thing feels like its lagging. For instance if you talked 2 me, I would only c your mouth move, and like 3 seconds later I would hear you.

As for the pills you are taking adderall, I used 2 take them myself (perscribed for me for school) they were only 10mg a pill and what you took was way 2 much. My mother would only give me half.

Recently, my friend told me about adderall, and he said it was another form of speed. I read the sideaffects and it can be serious if abused. I tried them anyway only 2. I can see why people do them, I can feel how good it can make you feel.

I can also feel the negative side affects such as the addiction, how it dwells on depression, and how your heart can increase the beats.

Now for your depression, I dont know if you have the same depression as me, but I have a chemical imbalance in my body (not severe) but enough to make me sad for a few weeks. Do not use anything to coop up with your depression. Its ok to smoke and drink every once in a while if you had a little of a bad day. But do not make it as a habbit. Pills for instance are highly addicting (i would know). And can lead to other drugs, and not to mention small balls.

Ok, now as for what you should do about this heart problem. The first thing you should do is tell your parents about your "heart problem", if you feel uncomforitable telling them it was from a drug you took, you can always tell that part later. Make them take you and get checked about this heart problem and who knows, it could be just anxiety (which I have). Second, before you experament with n e other drug (not that your should) you should read the side affects, make sure your not really alergic. And please make sure u know the proper dosage. Seriously, not to scare you or anything, if it was n e thing else like pain killers you and your friends could of over dosed.

Remember, your parents care much more about your own safety then just beating the caca out of you. Of course there gonna b mad, but its better than just keeping it in. The will help you more than punish you.

So lets recap here:

1. Tell your parents about your "heart problem"
2. Get a checkup from your doctor.

3. Tell your parents about your depression and how serious it is.

4. Never take a large dosage like that.

5. If you need to talk to someone personally, you can email me and I can help you dealing with depression and maybe get rid of it. :d

depressed boy