Pregnancy Forum - Miscarriage??help?advice??

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Q: Miscarriage??help?advice??

asked by: ctpeach on August 23rd, 2005

New User

I found out that I was pregnant after two home tests last week. I know I had to be preg too because my breasts got larger and sore. My ob and I assume I was about 5-6 weeks along as of yesterday. But I woke up yesterday morning with a significant amount of blood coming out. It looked exactly like menstral blood. No cramping, but some small clotting. It slowed down after a few hours. I only saw a little bit of blood when urinating by the end of the day. This morning there was nothing but aa small small light amount of pink only when I wiped...It seemed very diluted. Still no real cramping. I took an hcg blood test yesterday and have to go again tomorrow to compare. I cried all day yesterday. My husband and I were so excited about having a baby. My ob says i'll have to wait three months until we can start trying for a baby if this turns out to be a miscarrige. Has anyone got any advice or have this happen? How does one cope? Why is it that a lot of women who want to get pregnant have these problems but then you get the irresponsible ones who don't care or don't want one get pregnant? Then they abort it or bring it into the world unwanted? It just doesn't seem fair.
What makes it worse is my husband's sister-in-law with whom I am very close to had to have her pregnancy terminated because the baby's brain was not developing. She and her husband have been trying to get pregnant for almost a year now, still nothing.

Replies(10)

Pocket Angel

replied on August 23rd, 2005

Experienced User

Oh no, I am so sorry =o( are they sure its a miscarriage?

I am a person who got an abortion back in march. Worst mistake I have ever made. I will regret it and live with it for the rest of my life. Now I am pregnant again (again with my fiance). And let me tell you, I don't go a day without feeling horribly guilty. I can still miscarry, I know that, but how is it fair that I can concieve so fast and easily, after an abortion, meanwhile all these woman are trying and trying, sometimes never conceiving at all, and other times losing their babies. I am terrified of a miscarriage, although a part of me feels like I will have one, as punishment for the abortion. Your right, it isn't fair, and I feel so sad and guilty for what you are going through!

ctpeach

replied on August 23rd, 2005

New User

My ob didn't confirm a miscarriage, but I know she thinks it most likely is. I will find out for sure most likely tomorrow after I take the second blood test. If my hcg levels are lower, then I miscarried. If not, then she is going to test for a eptopic pregnancy even though I don't have cramping. It was just a lot of blood. I just called my ob office actually to see if yesterday's levels were sent in from the lab. The lady on the phone was rude because I didn't give her my name right off and couldn't remember the lab I went to because there are a few labs on the same road. After that for some reason I started to cry again, not sure if I was crying about the baby or just hormonal...I feel like a basketcase today.

ctpeach

replied on August 23rd, 2005

New User

With the blood test I took yesterday, my hcg was only 130. I test again tomorrow. But, I started to bleed again today, and now I have mild cramping. It looks like a strange but heavy period, so I am not going to get my hopes up at all, I am pretty positive that I lost my baby...I think I have cried all my tears, all day yesterday and most of today. I don't want to cry anymore...But I am sure I will for a while. My husband and I will have to wait 3 months to start trying for another baby. If I had only waited 4 more days to take my pregnancy tests, I would have just thought I was having my first period off my birthcontrol...A month late. Too late for if onlys. I guess I just have to keep myself busy. Luckly I start a new job in a couple weeks, that should keep my mind off of things.
-ctpeach

Pocket Angel

replied on August 23rd, 2005

Experienced User

I am so sorry to hear about your baby =o(

you know, you never know whats going on with your body. Maybe there was something wrong with the baby and god took matters into his own hands.

As for waiting 3 months... I have never heard of that before? I dont think there would be any reason for you to wait if you and your partner feel like you are ready to try again. I found some articles for you on the subject... I only did research because I never heard of anyone having to wait to try again after a miscarriage...

Http://www.Providence.Org/oregon/health_re source_centers/pregnancy_center/askanexper t_pregnancy_tryingagain.Htm

http://www.Bellaonline.Com/articles/art323 81.Asp

http://www.Babyhopes.Com/articles/aftermis carriage.Html

the majority of the articles I have read, say that since you miscarried so early and like you said, if you hadnt taken that hpt, you would of never known you were pregnant... That your body will still be strong and ready to concieve again....

But if you are not emotionally ready to try again, then definitely don't... But for some people, trying again might help you heal.

Whatever your decision, good luck to you and keep us all updated!

ctpeach

replied on August 23rd, 2005

New User

Thank-you very much angel. That means a lot to me. I am feeling a bit better now...More at peach with the whole ordeal. My husband came home from work and even though I told myself not to cry, I did. And he cried too. The first time I have ever seen him cry since I met him 5 years ago.
Thanks again, I will let you know what happens. I probably will wait 3 months anyway because that is what we originally planned and it would work best for me starting a new job and getting a house. I will make a post with any updates...And even a new pregnancy. Thanks for your support and concern angel.
Barbara (ctpeach)

Pocket Angel

replied on August 23rd, 2005

Experienced User

I am glad to see you have a plan! I think you will get through this just fine, only time can heal. Life seems like its only getting better for you, with a new job and a new house, its only a matter of time you will have a baby to share it all with. Yes please keep us updated, you are in my thoughts and good luck to you!

kirztens_mummy

replied on August 23rd, 2005

New User

I know how you feel and it really hurts as I myself just had a miscarriage last night. I was on my 6th week and like you didnt feel any cramps or nothing:-( just started bleeding. I had hcg test and internal exam and the doctor confirmed that its miscarriage this is my second miscarriage within two years and me and my husband was both devastated :( coz we were really expecting for this baby as our first one's 5 year's old. Ill have my scan tomorrow just to check if I still nedd d&c. I cant really get enough sleep:( my husband took time off work to be with me so just trying to put a brave face in front of him coz he's got so much on his plate. I joined this forum because I feel like I need someone who would understand my situation like yourselves.

fatfamily02

replied on August 23rd, 2005

Extremely eHealthy

Bleeding is common in the first few weeks of pregnancy--doesnt sound like miscarriage bleeding. Usually really long and heavy--really dark red. And I do know from experience that it is extremely easy to get preg again after miscarriage--if you are interested in trying again right away.

15% of all pregnancies start out twins and 75% of those loose one of the babys in the first few weeks of pregnancy.

Not trying to fill you up with false hope--but it might not be a miscarriage and I think you deserve all the facts. I dont ever understand in these situations why they dont always do u/s to see baby or check heart rate or whatever. Why do they continue to keep all thse women just hanging there in limbo--pos reinforcement would be great--neg could make her miscarry if she hasnt yet.

One girl on here had levels go up and down then up again, within a few days and bled with in those days. Dont know why but that is what happened to her just recently. Still dont know if it was a twin or if she miscarried thoug, but with levels climbing again prolly still preg.

Good luck hon, we'll be awaiting your dr visit tomorrow

kirztens_mummy

replied on August 23rd, 2005

New User

Thanks for your reply dear ill let you know tomorrow what has happened but im not really banking on it or keeping my hopes high as this is the 2nd time I had a miscarriage:( but it feels good to speak my heart out to people who could understand what ive(or women thats been on my situation) had been going through. Your advise is much appreciated

ctpeach

replied on August 23rd, 2005

New User

Well, I am pretty positive I did miscarry. I am just going to follow up with the blood test tomorrow for my ob's sake. An hour ago, I had very sharp pains, as if someone was stabbing my belly. Worse than menstrual cramps. More blood too, and small clots. My breasts have shrunk almost to thier original size too and the tenderness is not so much anymore either.
But, as mentioned earlier, I am coming to peace with it and I owe it all to my husband who has been such wonderful emotional dumpster for me.
We are still very sad about it, but we are trying think positive. And it will make us appreciate having a healthy pregnancy that much more in the future.
We decided that god sometimes makes mistakes like everyone else and when he let me get pregnant, he said "whoops! I screwed up something" and he decided to start over again. So, we'll start trying in november as to our original plan.

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